Watching the beautiful and familiar celling over me it left me with no question about where I am. A sigh left my lips thinking how I came back here once again but in a different situation when I thought I'll be never able to step inside this room. I sat up and roamed my eyes around the room. Indeed the room of the leader of White Wolf has a vibe. Black luxurious curtains with embroidery of golden threads, lavish types of furniture, a bookshelf filled with different books, and a large painting of a woman in the middle of the wall. I got down from my bed and walked toward that picture. No wonder the Emperor was so obsessed with her.
'' Isn't she beautiful?'' I heard Izaak's soft voice, only at times like this he sounds like any 19-year-old guy. I nodded. Izaak stood next to me and looked at the picture with eyes filled with yearning, pain, and regret.
'' My mother was named Lotous by His Majesty before my birth,'' Izaak said. I observed her picture and wondered if a person's picture is so beautiful than how beautiful she was in real life.
Indigo blue curly hair, light purple eyes, a small nose, and beautiful rosy cheeks, the soft smile on her lips made her look like a spring fairy. I blinked and mumbled,
'' delphinium, it suits her better.'' Izaak remained silent while gazing at me but I ignored his gaze. 1st Queen Elizabeth's real family origin is unknown to all including the Emperor and my eyes widen when the realization hit me. The power of Darkness is passed down in the family from generation.
'' 1st Queen could use the power of Darkness right?'' I asked Izaak. He seemed taken aback by my sudden question but replied eventually, '' Yeah, She could use the power of Darkness but that wasn't as powerful as mine.'' '' Till what extent she could use it?'' '' One shadow wolf was the highest level she could use.'' I closed my eyes trying to connect the sudden piece of information. '' And you can control over 100 shadow wolves?'' '' 777 to be exact.'' Izaak corrected me.
'' what? 777?'' I asked him in shock. That's crazy, even 100 shadow wolf is enough to defeat the whole Imperial Army. Facepalming myself I asked him again, '' Do you have any other information about 1st Queen?'' Izaak fell into a slump of deep thought. A thought rose in my mind, what if, just what if 1st Queen's background isn't an ordinary one, Izaak might gain a helpful aid that way.
'' Mother used to talk about 3 things continuously. One is how she saved her father in the deadland of the East. Second, how she lost her precious Peony and how cold yet warm the place is from where she is.'' I frowned at hearing about that. '' Nothing else?'' I asked. Izaak shook his head, '' Mother had so many secrets that only she knew about. I tried to find traces about her family but failed.'' That's understandable. Given what type of person Izaak is, he surely left no stone unturned. But I have to play it my way.
'' According to you the place she is from is a very cold place but filled with warm-hearted people, right?'' I asked him, Izaak nodded. A smirk appeared on my lips while thinking about the next step. '' What are you planning to do?'' I grinned and replied, '' I have the most useful information working for me, I will surely find out about 1st Queen's real origin.'' Izaak narrowed his eyes and asked, '' Do you think my Mother's family will be any help to me when they never come to help my mother?'' I sighed and smiled warmly, '' Your Highness, you never know. What if the Peony and description of her home was Queen's way to let you know that you will have people to help you in the future.''
Izaak blinked his eyes a few times and lowered his head, '' Just what is inside that head of yours?'' I giggled hearing him. For some reason, this morning seemed brighter than any other morning. We were having a serious conversation yet it sounded light. Then I suddenly remembered something,
'' How did you find last night? I mean I was inside that hidden garden?''
Izaak rose his eyes and replied, '' I couldn't find you anywhere and none saw you going out of the Imperial Palace. I was scared at first so I released Shadow Eyes to find your traces and found you inside that door but Princess, how could you open the door? None could ever open that door you know.''
How did it slip out of my mind? Even in my first life, I chanted those words almost unconsciously while looking at the carving of the sun and moon. How did I forget about that thing?
'' What about you?'' I asked Izaak. '' It opened on its own when I touched the Sun over it,'' He replied. Weird? I should investigate this after all of this. The first thing to be done right now is to find out about First Queen's origin.
'' Your Highness, I will contact you soon through the communicator. '' Izaak frowned and asked, '' Are you leaving?'' I chuckled softly at his question. Of course, I will be leaving and frankly, I hope I never step in this room again which reminds me of thousands of memories with him. I took a short glance at the room and shook my head a little, '' Your Highness shouldn't just bring anyone into your room.'' '' You aren't just anyone.'' He replied almost instantly. I observed his face trying to understand the emotions on his face and anxiety rose inside me seeing the familiar expression on his face. Izaak's eyes were filled with warmth and their face screamed about his inner thoughts. I know this expression better than anyone because, in my past life, he had this same expression on his face whenever he expressed his love and yearning for me.
I clenched my dress and turned around to speak the harsh words that might break his heart into thousands of pieces, '' Don't treat me as someone special and precious in your life Your Highness. This is the only thing I want in return for my loyalty to you.''
Izaak didn't say something and I couldn't bear to look at his face. I was neglectful about this, Izaak is someone who fell for me when he first saw me in the Garden and there is no guarantee he won't have some special feeling for me even after what I did for him. I was late to draw the line but not too late. Izaak can't love me in this life, he can't love the woman who caused the destruction and the death of his dear friends. I walked out of the room and to my surprise this place never changed even in my past life. Sophisticated and well-maintained. I was greeted by Izaak's most trusted man, Mark.
'' Good Morning My Lady.'' Mark greeted me with a warm smile. Watching his smile my heart throbbed remembering how he died while protecting me. I bite my lower lip and said softly, '' Can you arrange a carriage and some clothes for me? I want to go back to the Duchy.'' Mark nodded and ordered maids to take me to dress up. As always Mark didn't ask me any questions as if he trusted my words just like his Master. Tears started blaming in my eyes but I didn't let them fall. I have to leave this place as soon as possible or else I don't know how long I will be able to hold myself back.
Maids dressed me in a very normal yet elegant dress. Sky blue gown arms covered with beautiful white laces and a pair of white heels with it. Looking at my reflection in the mirror I saw the resemblance to Old Valentiara who was always pampered by Izaak yet decided to stab him in the back.
'' Lady has beautiful hair,'' One of the maids named Ella spoke while combing my hair into a braid. '' Is that so? I thought they looked dull next to my sibling's bright blue and crimson red hairs?'' I chuckled at my words. '' What are you saying my lady? Your hairs are really beautiful just like peonies even His Highness said the same?'' Ella said. I looked at her confused and I guess she understood. Her smile became softer as she took out something from the jewelry box and showed me. A beautiful pink jade hairpin shaped like Peony, I touched it softly and Ella said, '' His Highness asked the best Imperial Jeweler to carve this hairpin 3 days ago and said it would be worn by a lady who resembles the newly bloomed Peonies in the Imperial Garden. When we heard that we thought who is that lady who made the cold-blooded Prince think of the peonies of Imperial Garden which is praised for its it's rare beauty and fragrance? But after seeing you it left us with no question.'' Ella giggled and made me wear that hairpin. My heart was racing at an unusual speed after knowing about that thing. Izaak, he started having feeling for me?
Someone knocked on the door making me snap out of my thoughts. I saw the door opening and to my surprise it was Izaak. Maids bowed as Izaak walked inside the room. What is he doing here? I thought after what I said upstairs he won't see me for a while but here he was standing in front of me, staring at me eternally.
'' Leave us alone,'' He ordered the maids and they left closing the door behind us. I remained sitting in front of the mirror.
'' Mark said you asked for carriage?'' Izaak asked me while taking steps toward me. There was a small box in his hand which caught my eye.
'' I didn't go back the whole night. My family members must be worried-'' I stopped without finishing the sentence seeing Izaak's sympathetic gaze over me. '' None of them knew that you weren't at home in the middle of the night, Princess. '' I gulped and looked away. Izaak knows about my position in Grand Duke's family. Who was I fooling, him or myself? Izaak stood behind me and put something around my neck. I flinched at the sudden skinship of ours. Izaak's hot breath was touching my ears sending shivers through my spines. I felt something cold against my neck and when I looked at the mirror a bright diamond star pendant was hanging on my neck.
'' You told me not to treat you as someone special but what do I do? Your existence itself is a blessing sent by God himself.'' Izaak whispered in my ears. I would be lying if I say I didn't feel like crying when his deep husky voice sooth my ears with soft and sincere words. But I held it back. I can't break down. I have to push him away before it's too late.
'' I am an illegitimate child, trash of Grand Duke Casvoner's family Your Highness. Don't say things like this when they are nothing but some white lies.'' I said. Izaak held my shoulder and said, '' Wrong. Look at the mirror Princess. There is no way someone as brilliant as this person is trash or something insignificant.''
Seeing the reflection of mine and Izaak for a moment I had a thought.
'If I Didn't Choose To Stab This Man on His Back, Could I Think Of Accepting His Warm Heart?'