After some time of just standing here Shaku and the Empress ended up finding me. They took me to a room where we could talk and touch base with each other. Once we were finished Shaku led me back to the deployment bay to meet with a team of mechanics.
From what I understood it was thanks to TOBOR being here that they could get the Gargoyle functional enough to do repairs now.
Which for me meant that our encounter with it woke it up from its slumber. Getting me involved with another thing that I have no idea about and have no need to be involved with.
Though there wasn't much time for me to even overthink since my hours were now filled with new responsibilities. Teaching the Empress and Shaku about human history and what are good traits for a leader to display. Then helping the mechanic crew in anyway that I can. Which usually ends up with me doing food and drink runs for them.
The only times of leisure that I get is when I'm eating and if I'm lucky enough to find larger pockets of time. I spend that time playing with Michael since he has been feeling a lot more energetic and healthy.
"Are you sure you aren't overworking yourself?" Shaku asked as she sat across the table eating lunch with me.
"I'm fine. This is the least I can do since you and your people are going out of your way to help me find my people." I said not lingering on the thought for too long.
"Hmmmmm."
"What?"
"Nothing, it just seems like you haven't given this enough thought." Shaku said putting her utensil down.
"What do you mean?"
"Finding your family could take a lot longer than anticipated. So over exerting yourself in periods that you can use for rest seems detrimental. What are you going to do if you are too exhausted to deploy when necessary? Have you considered what you'll do if you don't find your family? I mean you humans don't even have a strong grasp on just how large space is." Shaku said laying it all out in front of me.
"That decision will be made when I get there. If I waste energy overthinking it I'll never get anywhere."
"But if you don't have a plan then you don't have a path to follow or steps you can take."
"I'm a soldier Shaku, all I have to worry about is surviving and following orders."
"You don't need to be a soldier anymore." Shaku said slamming her hand on the table. Then realizing where she is she calmed herself down a little. "Tadao. You left the battlefield a long time ago. So, I think you should let us worry about helping you find your family. While you worry about letting go of the past." Shaku said before getting up and leaving me alone at the table.
The only thought I had floating around in my head after hearing those words were selfish and childish. Which was; why do you care? I knew it was wrong of me to be angry at someone who was only trying to show me they care.
Which is why I tried to ignore it as I went on but I couldn't. Even while helping the crew repairing the Gargoyle it was nagging at me.
"Hello, is Mr. Mishiki here?" The Empress called out.
"Is something wrong?" I asked walking towards her.
"No, not at all. I was just wondering if you would be able to assist me with something."
"He's all yours." Shouted one of the mechanic.
"I hope I'll be of more help to you than the others." I said with a weak smile.
She ended up taking me to her office which was an even bigger mess than when I first saw it. Though somehow her bookshelf and other shelvings were kept clean.
"I was wondering if you would be able to help me clean and organize this room." Empress Zu said with a smile.
We got straight to work. With me picking up all the papers off the floor and tables while she reorganized her glassware. Though just because I could now speak and understand her language didn't mean I could read her written language. So she ended up having to help me organize all the papers into piles.
"Is something the matter? It looks like you have something on your mind." The Empress asked while handing me a paper to be sorted.
"It's nothing. Just thinking about something Shaku and I talked about earlier." I responded as I pointed to something on a paper.
"That one will go over here. Well it's nice to see the two of you getting along. Shaku has always had a tendency to always appear standoffish and scary to new people. But once you really get to know her you'll learn that she's a very sweet and caring girl." Empress Zu said as she picked up a stack of papers and put them away.
"I'm starting to see that. Though I'd be lying if I said it didn't come as a shock that she opened up to me so quickly." I responded as I helped her with the other stacks of paper.
"Do humans usually keep to themselves?" Zu asked giving me her undivided attention.
"That's a bit of a difficult question. I'd say we were all born as open and trusting creatures but our world is too dangerous far all of us to stay that way. I guess you can say we were too good for the world we were born in but raised as something far too undeserving of it." I said waiting for her response.
"I'm sorry I don't think I quite understand.. However, I can see how your environment and upbringing has left you scared and hurt. More than just in the physical sense. But something I've come to notice is that you have a tendency to forget just how strong you are. I know that if it were me and I had something that big troubling me I would have just kept to myself. So to see you stand here in front of me and open up about your past. Shows that you have the strength to be vulnerable to people." Zu said as she held me in a hug.
I guess there are people like her in space as well. I know that if Haru was still here that these two would have been amazing friends.
Though being stood here in the arms of another person only reminded me of something I tried so very hard to ignore. I miss them. I miss my old squad mates. With the stupid banter we would always get into with Haru and Michael. I miss my wife and daughter. The amount of birthdays and Christmases I lost. The time and memories I'll never be able to get back.
Thinking about all of these things I could help myself but hug her back. Where I didn't even need to look to be able to know that she smiled when I did. Because if she is anything like Haru was then she would.
"Thank you… It would look like I needed that." I said as I pulled away from her.
"There's no need to thank me. It would be bad of me as an individual let alone a ruler to see someone in need and not do anything about it." The Empress said with an almost elegant aura to it.
"You are just too good." I said with a smile.
"Now if I were to make some bold assumptions I would say Shaku was worrying about you and you didn't know how to feel."
"Wow, spot on. How did you know?"
"She spoke to me in private saying that we shouldn't be sending you out to fight for us."
"Why would she worry herself over me like that?"
"I think that's a question that's better asked to someone else. So why don't you go ahead and find her. I'll finish up her myself."
Before I could get another word in she was pushing me out of the room. To where I now had no other choice but to find Shaku and ask her that question myself.