November 2020
Ian's house was some blocks away from my apartment, hence I decided to personally go and talk to him. He could understand me better rather than over the phone. I couldn't talk to him though we were patrolling the city last night. Lara left us in the middle of the night to get to her boyfriend. Yet, I couldn't bring myself to ask for his help.
My fingers trembling, I rang the bell twice. In a while, Ian appeared in front of me swaying the door open. I glanced at him, perturbed. His house was well-kept and clean for a young man living alone. His parents were working in another country.
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"I hope you're not involving me in some kind of crazy girlfriend boyfriend arguments-"
"No... No... its serious"
I interrupted Ian.
He straightened himself, legs crossed, studying the text from my phone.
"No wonder you were acting so wierd... 11 October 2020... 5.13 pm."
He muttered to himself.
I had been off duty since my breakup which was unlike me until I resumed yesterday. Even on holidays, I worked my ass off.
"I'm really having a hard time with everything...it's so hopelessly messed up"
I was least bothered to wanting to brush off how miserable and helpless I've been feeling the past days. I was relieved to be able to talk to him openly.
"You can't report him missing since he clearly said he wants to be gone and... That means he is gone on his accord and not taken", a scowl visible on his face as he spoke.
My brain cells were really messed up, entangled with each other.
"He just embarrassed us man...dumping someone over a text. Coward" He mumbled, his eyebrows were knitted into frustration, he scratched his nape anxiously.
"Though this is wierd. Something about this is bugging me. Why did he leave you if he really loved you? Did you try to contact him?"He added, still pinning his eyes on the screen.
I nodded as if he could see me.
"That was the first thing I did but his phone has been switched off. I've been calling him since then. No answer."
"He just disappeared. Did you try to find him at his place?"
"Come on...I tried...I'm still trying very hard, searching up and down. From his friends to his colleagues but nothing. His car was gone. No results."
I inhaled deeply.
"We bought an apartment. We were staying together. We were happy"
I gulped at the happy and precious memories of us playing in my mind, now making me upset and in pain. Averting my gaze away, I tried not to cry again.
"Okay, tell me from the beginning!"
"The day before, we had a latte on our way back home...around 10 pm. The next day, he was not there...it was wierd. He would always tell me or text me...or even stick a note. When he finally replied, he sent me this..." I pointed my index finger to the phone.
"This so called break up text. I hurried back home to knock some sense into him when I realized his clothes were gone. In my own world of grief, it never dawned on me to ask his parents. Yesterday, when I mustered the courage and called his mother. Her talks made it seem that Anse was neither at her place. Nor his father had any idea."
I waited for him to absorb my blabbering.
"Anything strange with him or did you guys fight over something?"
"We hardly fought. There isn't any conversation that I haven't replayed with him the last few days...before he left. I searched for any likely reason he could just end up everything, every little thing I may have told him that could have led him to make this decision."
Tears flooded my eyes again.
"Are you sure?"
"I can't seem to find one" I nodded.
I ran my fingers through my hair.
"He could have at least given me some excuse. It may have been less awful. If something was wrong, we could have worked on it together. I've been so desperate since he's gone."
I least cared how pathetic this would make me look in front of Ian.
"I am sorry. I thought you wouldn't want to talk about what was bothering you. I should have been there a long time before-"
"It's fine"
I was not sure if I could sense a pain in his voice but I wouldn't have even let anyone close to me at that time, to see my pain. My pain is intimate and I'd prefer suffer alone.
"Did he pack his suitcase?"
"There are still some of his clothes and belongings left," I replied.
"He left in a hurry"
His statement was more like a question.
"Maybe, he wasn't sure about the date or whether to go or not!" he added.
As much as I thought I knew Anse, he was always sure of whatever he wanted to do.
"He left his work related documents and more important stuffs like his birth certificate. I thought he would be back to take them. He took his passport, license and his wallet, ID, though."
Does it make any sense?
I sighed, confused. He took his passport to leave the country. But how on earth could he be applied in any company without the necessary documents, certificates etc for a job?
"Sefa think really hard for a moment. It doesn't look like an ordinary break up to me"Ian said, with a concerned look.
"I don't know about you. But to me, it seemed like he loves you dearly and...and he was been forced to break up with you," he added.
He pointed at the text message.
"'Don't forget me.' such a daring jerk. Still this isn't the kind of thing a person does without thinking about it for a while at least. Though he had been planning to go... It may have been that he had been pushing the date to gain more time with you and reflect on what he should do. Finally, he left quickly so he wouldn't change his mind. And why did he put so much thought to dump someone?" he leaned on his chair.
"What are you trying to say?"
He sighed and handed me the phone.
"I can't pick it up yet but there's something behind this text!"
He took a sip of his coffee.
"Actually you can help me. A hacker can decode this shit. I know I'm asking much but please...All I want to know is that he is okay. I last heard about him since a...month. I don't wanna involve you in any other way in this."
Being a FBI agent, I was asking my colleague to assist me in an illegal job.
"Please, I've got to do this. I've no one else to ask for help" I was literally begging.
He wrinkled his forehead in deep thoughts. Both of us sat in silence.
Three days later
Sinking into my chair, I stared at the clock. 2.13 pm. Glancing over my report lazily, I handed it to my superior, Mr Hartley. I've been dealing with the pain of his perceptible absence for a while now. And since I've known about Anse's disappearance, I have been in constant fear.
His car had been spotted near the airport. As if it was left behind deliberately. Since then, he was not captured in any CCTV camera. He hid himself well. But I hadn't lose hope. Vibrations from my phone in my pocket snapped me out of my thoughts. Ian was calling. Maybe he has some news for me.
"Nearby Cafe. We're meeting a friend." He commanded and hung up.
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"Andrew, Sefa. Sefa-" Ian announced, his expression nonchalant.
"Andrew" he introduced as he shaked my hand.
"That car... the black 2019 edition... Oh my God... Is that yours?" he grinned cheerfully pointing towards my parked car, his eyes sparkling.
Andrew, a teen dressed in an oversized black shirt tucked in his blue shorts barely reaching his knees. A cap covering his eyes. Hideous.
"Yeah", I smiled at him.
Anse gifted me the car on my birthday. Cracking the knuckles of his fingers, he began typing something on the keyboard, with a casual and cool expression.
"This act won't be entertained again."I pressed my lips.
This was illegal without a warrant to access public details. He nodded a bit nervous while Ian held back his laughter.
I fidgeted nervously with the lace of my jacket. I never wanted to pry in Anse's privacy but his disappearance was creeping me out.
"Did you find anything?" I asked for the second time.
"The last text being the last one he sent you. After that, nothing" He replied blankly.
"No payments for his credit card. Inactive on social media. Dead silence after 11 October. I can say he wasn't cheating on you for sure. One woman man" he scoffed.
After a while, confused at first, he parted his lips.
"Were you aware of him having another apartment?" he asked me dryly.
Deciphering the confused look on my face, he turned to Ian.
"I'm texting you the address"
Turning back to me, his expressions softened a bit.
"I'm afraid I can't do anything more to help you. I can see that you really did like that dude."
I gave them a weak smile, trying to convey how I was grateful for their help. They stared at me, not sure what to say. Why do I see pity in their eyes?
"Thank you. I really appreciate your help. I guess...I really need to...go now. So yeah, bye" my voice cracked.
With that, I spun on my heels and rushed outside the Cafe, footsteps approaching me behind.
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My fingers glued to the wheel and my other hand gripping the changing gears tightly, I kept driving. My knuckles were pale. We were going to break into Anse's apartment. At first, I thought it was wrong but right now, nothing is deemed more correct than finding him. Ian kept looking at me every now and then. My body relaxed a bit at the thought of actually finding him just at home as I pulled up in front of Anse's address.
The receptionist told us that the room number 302 was on the 6th floor. We took the elevator, barely sharing glances. Still 3rd floor.
He exhaled quite audibly, breaking me from my trance. He had been quiet all this time.
"What is it?"
I arched my eyebrow at him.
"Why did you hurt yourself?"
In a relatively low voice, he asked as he pinned his gaze to the floor, a slight frown on his face. I realised he may have noticed the fresh cut marks on my wrist.
"Do you think he would come back if you cut yourself?"
I didn't feel like saying anything. Judging someone and keeping yourself in the other one shoes are a choice. We finally arrived on the 6th floor. The doors opened.
I stepped out of the elevator.
"Are you coming?"
I wasn't in the mood of any explanation or anything. Walking up to the door with a deep breath,...room number 302. As the camera went turned 180 degrees to the left. Ian attempted to open the door successfully. And when it returned back on us, we were done. He shoved his small and useful gadget into his pocket. An unpleasant feeling built up in my upper abdomen.
Should I really do this? Anse would hate me for this. He kept this apartment as his private matter though we've been together for so long. He didn't want me to know whatever was behind this door. I tried to contain all of my fears. My quivering hand reached the door handle and grabbed the knob. I took a few calming breaths though it wasn't really lulling my racing heart.
Whatever was awaiting for me behind that door would either give me hope or break it. I closed my eyes. Please be inside. I felt Ian's fingers encircling my idle hand. I looked at the door as he held my hand tighter. He is inside safe and sound. A glimpse of hope lighted up my mind, lifting the burden off my chest at once yet my heart picking up its pace.