Ras had spent his first time in Sirius utterly ignoring Mebsuta and only reading books at the manor's home library and ignoring her attempts to befriend him. He had particularly liked the astronomy books. He found it a shame that he couldn't read all of them as he only spent two weeks in Sirius as Stellar had to go to an event in the following month.
He was forcefully taken to Sirius again the following year. As an eleven-year-old, he decided that he'd try to befriend Mebsuta as long as she didn't do anything weird to him. When they met up at the manor again, she greeted him like how a lady would, which surprised him. She did this because she didn't want him to ignore her like how he did last year.
Fortunately, they were able to get along. When Ras opened up to her, he started admiring her endless energy and courage. She'd take him to her favorite cafes and restaurants. He enjoyed all of the food he had eaten. One day, they were in her room watching a television documentary about space. When it panned to a view of the starry sky, Ras was amazed. He really liked space and had dreamed of being an astronaut or an astronomer to study them. Stellar would even take him to a planetarium once a year.
He glanced over to look at Mebsuta who looked very intrigued. There was a glisten in her eyes when something caught her interest. He asked, "You haven't seen a starry sky before?"
"I've never left the city."
He was surprised. "Really?"
"Mother forbids me to leave. She says that the outside world is a dangerous place."
That's what Dad said to me before…
He noticed her intense gaze on the television screen. "Have you ever thought about leaving the city?"
"Plenty of times. Not only do I want to see a starry sky, but I want to know if Souhait exists."
Ras raised an eyebrow. "Souhait? As in the dragon from the fairy tale?"
A pout formed on her lips as she stared at him straight in the eye. "He's not a fairy tale! He's real!"
"How are you so sure?"
"My great-grandma met him long ago!"
"Great-grandma? Oh, you mean the founder of this city, Penelope Leonis?"
"Yes! She was there when he was living on the land, apparently! She described him as a lavender dragon with a long snake-like body and has heterochromatic eyes, apparently! One was lavender and the other was gold." She clasped her hands together and looked lovesick. "Oh, how I would love to meet him!"
Usually, compliments about him would make Souhait blush and a little flustered, but her words did not make him have those feelings. Instead, he felt anxious. Having met Mebsuta as an adult, her admiration for him was an unsettling one. It felt like fanaticism, like she was a cultist for him. He hated those types of admiration. That sort of excessive obsession was the worst feeling. It meant that she'd do whatever she wanted and preach it under his name, as if he was the reason she was like this. He never met her prior, yet her actions were all for him. She had denied her own self and gave everything to him when it wasn't warranted.
He then recalled Arcturus who looked at him with admiration as well. When he had first met Arcturus, he had been a bit skeptical of him due to his idolization. However, his admiration was completely different from Mebsuta's. His admiration for him did not cause him to lose his sense of self. He was still himself. Everything he did was by his own choice and he had never looked back at the harsh decisions he chose. Arcturus's admiration felt warm. He felt as if he could trust him with anything. That was why he wanted him by his and Nova's side.
However, in the case of young Ras, he liked that lovesick look on her. While she did like teasing him, it did feel like an act as she did it for reaction purposes and not out of genuine desire. This was the first time he saw an expression that made her feel alive to him. It made him want to see more of it. He wanted to know more about her.
"There hasn't been evidence that the dragon is still alive. Besides, if the dragon was that long and purple, it would've made news by now."
Mebsuta hummed. "That's where you're wrong, Ras. Souhait is still alive, but he doesn't take the form of a dragon anymore. I remember my great-grandmother telling me that he resides inside the body of a man with golden blond hair and lavender eyes."
Golden blond hair? That's an unusual shade of blond in itself…
"How is that even possible?"
She shrugged. "Regardless, my great-grandma told me how beautiful the man was. He looked like a woman at first glance, but his facial features do look masculine when looking up close. His golden blond hair looks as if it shines and his lavender eyes look like the sky in sunset."
"That's called twilight."
"I'd love to meet that person one day!" She remarked, ignoring his words.
"If he lived in your great-grandmother's era, that would be around four hundred years ago, right? We Ilacians don't start showing signs of aging until we're around two hundred years old. What if he's a wrinkly old man by then?"
"I don't care if he is a wrinkly old man. I just want to meet him!"
"Why do you want to meet him?"
"I have a wish, of course!"
"What is it?"
Mebsuta paused before replying back with a smile. "I can't tell you! My great-grandma said that wishes have to be kept secret, so I can't tell you."
He understood why his father had said humans were dangerous. Falling in love was a crazy, unsettling feeling. Once he fell for Mesbuta, he wanted to become everything to her. He was okay with being a convenient choice, even though he wasn't really accepting of it deep down. He just wanted to keep loving Mebsuta because she was someone he could never obtain. Even when they married and started a family together, his worries of being the convenient choice were still bottled up. He wondered if this is what his father felt when he fell for his mother.
Souhait saw a transition of this man's life. Taking in his worries only made him feel pity for this man. "How foolish."
Suddenly, his shirt's collar was grabbed and he was pulled towards Ras who looked at him with fury. With a stoic expression, Souhait continued, "I am not wrong. You are a fool. You have been blindly chasing after a man your wife was enamored with–a man she knew nothing about–with the utmost devotion as if you were idolizing her yourself. You neglected your own daughters just so you can make your wife happy by presenting us to her."
Souhait grabbed Ras's wrist and then pointed towards the memory. The scene had shown Ras, in his late twenties, sitting up on his bed and watching Mebsuta sleep. He stroked her hair.
All this searching for this lavender-eyed man you love so much is taking a toll on my body. Yet, I am still going with it because I want you to love me. I wish you would love me back…if you do, I wouldn't have to worry about being a convenient choice.
"Those are words only a foolish man like you would say."
With a hot glare, Ras yelled, "It's not foolish, because I did bring him here!"
"So, did you get a gold star from your wife as she praised you for your hard work while patting your head?"
Ras's grip loosened as he hung his head low. "No…she didn't really say anything to me other than 'Good job'."
"See?"
His grip became tight again as Ras stared at him straight in the eye. "Mebsuta loved and idolized you so much, yet how could you have the audacity to kill her?" He had an anguished expression that made him even more pitiful.
Souhait used his own strong grip to forcibly remove Ras off of him. "I never asked to be idolized fanatically. I never wanted her love! In fact, I hate it when people worship me like some kind of deity! Idolize? That is just an obsession! Blindly obsessing over someone only hurts others. I never wanted that, yet you did it! You hurt so many people and even Nova! All because you were obsessed with your wife who was obsessed with me…"
Souhait hated how he was losing his composure. He wanted to stay calm, but it was impossible. This man's very existence ignited fury within him. All he wanted was to get the task over and done with, but he knew it was futile. He couldn't hold back anymore as he took out another one of the medicinal tablets and bit into the fourth one.