Darkness is something that she has grown accustomed to. Whether her eyes are closed or open, all she sees is darkness. She lives in the midst of darkness and grows up in the midst of darkness, so it is natural for darkness to become her closest companion.
Unfortunately, even if she screams until her throat is hoarse, darkness will never answer her questions. Why does she have to be in the darkness? Why was she born in the midst of darkness? And why does she have to befriend darkness?
Unanswered questions and unexpressed feelings make her feel lonely. Loneliness envelops all of her senses, making her foolish heart feel constricted. She wants loneliness to be her friend, but unfortunately, loneliness has other plans for her.
A bright hole that allows her to see something she shouldn't see. The light that tells the story of someone very similar to her, that's what she imagines even though she has never seen her own appearance in this darkness. Nevertheless, the story of that person makes her unable to befriend loneliness.
It makes her feel a new feeling that ultimately only makes her suffer more. A feeling that arises from not being able to have something she should have. That feeling is envy.
Envy
Envy
Envy
Envy
Finally, loneliness gives her a reason to be jealous.
The woman opened her eyes. Seeing the unfamiliar ceiling of the room. She tried to get up from her bed, but the pain in her chest made her groan. She tried to squirm and fight the pain, but her body was so weak as if she had no bones to support her.
The woman knew she wasn't in a safe place. Not with the shape of the unfamiliar ceiling of the room. The story of how her fellow women were tortured by their enemies made her shudder. Death is not a bad thing for them, but being raped repeatedly until death is the worst way to die for her.
The commotion she made caught the attention of someone outside the room. The sound of footsteps getting closer made the woman's face turn pale. Her heart beats faster as the dark future approaches.
She didn't want to end up like that, dead with her legs splayed like a frog. She didn't want to imagine it even though she could. A very bad ending.
Although her job was nothing to be proud of and her hands were stained with the blood of both the guilty and the innocent, the woman didn't want to die without dignity. She had to end this before the dreadful future became a reality.
She began scanning the room for a sharp object that could end her suffering immediately. However, the room was so empty, with only a bed she was lying on and a chair beside it. How could she end it all?
Foolish plans started forming in her depressed mind.
She could bash her head hard against the wall. Her brain would be shattered by the impact, and she would end before realizing it. But the problem was that she had to sit up first to do it. Unfortunately, her body was too weak to move except for waving her arms.
She could also die by suffocating her face with a pillow. This method required her to stay conscious for a few minutes before running out of breath. But unfortunately, she had trained herself to hold her breath for half an hour, and she knew she would lose consciousness before she stopped breathing.
The footsteps were getting closer, and they were right in front of her room's door. She heard the sound of the latch being lifted and the key being turned with her sharp hearing. The time she had left was running out, and the very bad ending was getting closer.
The woman ran out of ideas. She couldn't find the quick death she wanted. She had no other choice but to hit her neck hard and hope her trachea bone would break. At least she only had to suffer for a few minutes, which was better than the bad ending she had imagined before.
The door opened, and the woman took the cue to punch her neck. She had only one chance before she could be stopped by her captor.
!
Her hand stretched out, her fist clenched, and with all her might she swung it towards her own neck. The woman was not afraid to die, but as her punch was halfway there, her little sister's face flashed through her mind. The fist that had been flying swiftly stopped, trembling with doubt.
Before she could strengthen her resolve, a strong hand held her fist back.
"What the hell are you doing?!"
"..." The woman didn't answer, only regret bloomed in her heart for hesitating to end her life.
Now she had to bear a terrifying future with a very bad ending.
"Lady! I don't know what's happened to you and what suffering you're going through, but suicide is not the way out! Life is beautiful and you have to cherish it! I'm sure you still have many things you can do in this world! Don't give up so easily, Lady!"
Never had she imagined that the man who had kidnapped her would be the one shouting out words of encouragement that confused her. His concerned and worried face was so genuine that it didn't seem like he was pretending.
The woman was confused. Although her captor certainly didn't want her to die before he could enjoy her warm body, she didn't have to hear words of encouragement to stay alive like this. It crossed her mind that what was really happening might not be as bad as she had imagined.
So with her still-dry throat, she said, "W..Wa…Wa..ter"
"You have to stay alive, think of your family—ah? Water? Ah.. yes.. yes.. wait a minute... I'll get it... but don't try to kill yourself again, okay?" Her sudden request caught the man off guard.
"..." She didn't answer, only staring at him with a forced expression.
"Do you promise?" The man insisted.
She had no choice but to nod.
"Okay… wait a minute." Quickly, he ran out to get some water.
The woman was alone again, this time trying to look more closely at her surroundings. The wooden walls and furniture and the floor are made only of dry cement without any ceramic coating. This house looked like the poor house where she used to live with her family.
There is only one window on the wall, and no painting or anything is decorating it. From outside the window, she can see the hot weather and the scorching sun. The air ventilation above the window brings the smell of sand and sea. The woman realizes that she is currently near the beach or in a fishing village.
After imagining her current location, the room door opens again. The man appears holding a glass of water in his hand. His hurried movements cause the water in the glass to spill, leaving only half a glass full.
He seems to not believe that she will keep her promise. The woman cannot say anything with the man's worried attitude. At this moment, she is confident that she is not being held captive by this man. He is too innocent and foolish to be someone who kidnaps a girl with the intention of raping her.
"Here, sorry for spilling it a bit," the man says while handing her the half-full glass.
She only nods in response, takes the glass, and smells the water in it. Her nose is trained to distinguish the scent of dangerous substances such as neurotoxins or aphrodisiacs. She just wants to be careful and not easily trust someone she just met, but it seems her worry is not needed once again.
After moistening her dry throat, she can now speak without stuttering, "Who are you?" she asks, looking at him with a scrutinizing gaze.
"Ah... My name is Agung, Agung Hanesman (pronounced Honestman)," Agung answers while scratching the back of his head. "Who is your na--?"
Before Agung can finish his question, the woman asks again, "What organization are you from?"
"Organization? Ah... I joined the fishermen association in Pasia village!"
"Fishermen association?" the woman squints her eyes.
"Yup, the fishermen association in Pasia village. I'm just a regular member hehehe but Sir Hartono said someday I could become an official if I work hard," Agung pats his chest proudly.
"..." Once again, the woman's worry is not needed. She breathes a sigh of relief and lowers her guard towards Agung a bit. This man is too innocent to be considered dangerous.
"Ah… Lady, Who is your na--?"
"Where am I right now?" the woman cut off Agung's question once again.
"We are currently in the village of Pasia, located on the outskirts of Mukomuko Regency," he replied.
"Mukomuko Regency?! Is that a regency in Bengkulu Province?" surprise could be heard in her voice.
"Oh, yes, Bengkulu Province... where are you from, lady?"
The woman did not answer, her mind filled with confusion and disbelief. She remembered being shot and falling into the sea. She was carrying out her mission at the dock in Padang City, West Sumatra Province. But she did not regain consciousness and was carried away by the currents to the neighboring province.
If she had traveled by land, it would have taken eight hours to cross two provinces, but she did not know how long she had been carried by the waves. How could she survive for that long in the water?
"Did you find me?" she asked.
Agung nodded and replied, "I found you being carried away by the waves with a bleeding back. I immediately took you to the local doctor's house, Mrs. Niem. After that, I took you to my house to rest. Ah... I swear I didn't do anything weird to you while you were unconscious," Agung quickly raised two fingers.
The woman ignored Agung's silly concern. If he had done anything to her while she was unconscious, she would have known. She was currently in a good condition with a bandaged chest, and if that were the case, Mrs. Niem would have known that her injury came from a gunshot.
"Thank you," she said flatly.
"Ah... you're welcome... hmm... Lady, you know... eehhh... can I know your name?" After being cut off twice, Agung became hesitant to ask.
The woman smiled at Agung's innocent demeanor and replied, "My name is Kylia."