(Izumi)
I stare after Izuku with wide eyes, unable to react enough to chase after him and ask for answers. Not that I have any right to do that in the first place. But… Mom knew? She's known all this time that Izuku has been alive?
I swallow with a suddenly dry throat, closing my eyes as I take deep, slow breaths in an effort to stop the hallway from spinning. I let them out just as slowly, then repeat. After a few minutes of doing this in silence I open my eyes and try to… to think about this.
I won't make the same mistake as when I pushed Izuku away.
Yes, I want to believe him. Yes, I want to think that he wouldn't lie about something like this. But despite what I wish otherwise, he is a villain. He could be trying to drive a wedge between Mom and I. Except… he doesn't have to. What would he even get out of it? We already don't talk all that much, so there's really not anything he could accomplish by trying to worsen our relationships.
But… if he is telling the truth…
`~`
"Mom! Where's Izuku?" I ask my mom while she's making dinner. I'm so excited to tell him about the idea Katsuki and I came up with so that we can all still be heroes together! Even if other people won't call him a hero, I know that he will be!
When I ask my question though, Mom's face twitches. Not into a smile though, and it's kind of like she's trying to hide whatever her expression is. It's kind of… I don't think I like it. But then she gives me a smile and I tell myself that I was just imagining things.
"He's out with your father at the moment. You seem excited though, so why don't you share whatever it with me instead!"
I pout at her and cross my arms at her. "No! I need to tell Izuku how Katsuki and him and me can all be heroes together!"
Mom's mouth turns down into a frown, but it's a bit different from a frown. She's scowling? Why? "Well sweety, dinner is almost ready and then you'll have to go to bed. Toshi and Izuku won't be back until after you're asleep, so how about you tell me what you were thinking and I'll let him know when he gets here?"
I look up while I think. Because I do like going to bed at the same time every night… But I also want to be the one who tells him about our idea… But this is Mom…
I nod and give Mom a happy smile. "Ok! So, we decided that…"
`~`
Remembering it now, was she actually listening to me back then? After that night I never tried to bring it up to him, so did she ever actually tell him? And then he told me about those notebooks, which I told Bakugou about…
I frown as my brows furrow, another memory of my mother coming to me.
`~`
I fidget with the edge of the gold-colored sundress Mom is having me try on at the clothing store. She was very particular about it being gold instead of just yellow. I look up and see her coming back with even more clothes for me to try on and hold back a wince.
I don't like this. I don't like how she's so excited to get me new things to wear when she forgot to bring Izuku with us for our birthday. We left so early that day that I slept the whole drive there. Then Dad wandered off so it ended up being just Mom and I at the amusement park the whole day. I don't know why I didn't notice that Izuku wasn't with us the whole day, maybe I was just too excited about meeting All Might and having him shake my hand? Maybe until we got home, I just thought that he chose to spend our birthday with Dad because Katsuki and I had been ignoring him.
I don't think it really matters what the reason is that he wasn't there with us that day. What matters is that he wasn't. Just like he isn't with us now even though I'm pretty sure he would like new clothes too. Why isn't he here? Dad is busy with work today, so who's with Izuku?
"Izumi! You'll look adorable in this skirt!" Mom holds up a skirt the same shade of green as my hair, and I like it. I really do. But the smile I give her must not let her know that because she frowns and drops it into the pile before coming into the changing room with me, pulling the curtain closed to give us privacy. "Izumi, what's wrong? Do you not like any of the clothes? Do you want to go do something else?"
"Um…" I look at the ground, watching as my bare feet shuffle in place. "It's not that. It's just…" I trail off, not sure how to say it. Well, I do know. But something about Mom whenever I bring up Izuku makes me hesitate to do so.
Before long Mom wraps me in her arms, hugging me tightly against her. I let the side of my head lay against her chest, listening to the steady rhythm of her heartbeat. "Izumi. No matter what's wrong, you know you can always talk to me about it, right?" Her voice is sweet, kind, and I let myself melt into the hug, wrapping my own arms around her.
"Yeah… I do. Thanks Mom." I feel her nod before asking me again what the problem is. This time, I answer. "Well… Why isn't Izuku here?" I can feel her body tense and her heartbeat changes a bit but I continue on. After all, I can talk to her about anything.
She doesn't reply for a bit, and I start to wonder if she's not going to tell me. Is it a secret? Eventually she does speak, though, but with a question. "Why do you think your brother isn't here?"
I frown at the question she answers me with. Is it my fault? I wonder. And with that single thought, I know why he isn't here with us. And it is my fault. Mine and Katsuki's. "Is it because I've been ignoring him?"
I've been feeling bad about it ever since I started doing it, never seeing Izuku with anyone else. He's always alone whenever we're at school, writing in his quirk analysis notebook or drawing something in his sketchpad. I want to talk like we used to, but Katsuki is always reminding me about the plan and how it will never work if we can't keep it up.
Sometimes I wonder if I like being Katsuki's friend like when we were a trio instead of a duo. Izuku would always joke about us being a lettuce sandwich with Katsuki being a piece of chicken in the middle. His reaction to that was always funny. But without Izuku it doesn't work.
Mom hums without answering my question, responding with her own question instead. Again. "Why have you been ignoring him?"
I don't like that she won't answer me, but she's my mom so I answer her anyways. After telling her about Katsuki's plan and how I think it's stupid now she just hums again before pulling away. She gives me a small smile, but it doesn't feel like a nice smile. "It's important to keep your promises, Izumi."
I shiver and look down before glancing up again. "B-but what about-"
Her hands tighten on my shoulders and I wince. Her smile looks… mean now. "Keep. Your. Promises," she states in a clipped tone. I don't like it. I've never heard Mom talk like this. It's scary. So to get her back to normal as soon as possible I nod rapidly, my head bouncing up and down. She smiles at that, letting go of my shoulders before grabbing the skirt she was showing me earlier "That's a good girl, Izumi. You're going to grow up to be an amazing hero.
I don't like listening to her heartbeat after that.
`~`
I tried talking to her about what was going on a few more times after that, while growing up. But she always just gave me a tense smile and told me to keep my promise.
"Why?" I whisper to myself as I draw my knees up against my chest, surprised to find that I'm sitting on the floor with my back against the wall. "Why would she tell me that? Siblings… Twins are supposed to support each other." The hypocritical words burn as they leave my throat, or maybe that's the bile that covers the floor next to me?
"I shouldn't have done it. It was a bad thing to do. Then we started hurting him… Why? When… When did I stop trying to tell her and Dad about it? When-"
I draw in a sharp breath as another memory forces itself to the front of my mind. A memory of a present. A treatment?
`~`
"The doctor said that listening to something will help you sleep," Mom says as she puts a pair of All Might themed headphones over my head, leaving one side off so that we can still talk. She's careful to make sure they don't get caught on the bandages, or are too tight. Once she's sure they won't fall off, she gives me a worried look. "Do you need anything else?"
I wave my left hand in the negative, my dominant right stuck in a cast. I can't shake my head either since it hurts to do so. Apparently Dad knows someone who knows Recovery Girl though, so I won't have to stay in the hospital for more than a few days! The doctors told me that I'd still have some burn scars though. Thankfully they at least won't be visible while I'm just living my life. As long as I don't wear anything that shows off my back then nobody will even know they're there!
Mom sighs, shaking her head in a way that makes me feel sheepish. "Honestly Izumi, what were you even doing in a place like that?"
I frown. "I honestly don't know," I answer. "Apparently the beam that fell on my head knocked the memory right out of me. Must have been jealous!"
She swats at my hand reproachfully, causing me to giggle. I might never remember what happened, but as Mom puts on the other side of the headphone and turns it on, All Might's motivating words of me being a future pro drifting through my ears, I have to wonder-
I barely notice All Might's voice changing a bit as I drift off to sleep, painkillers making me brush off how it sounds like the Symbol of Peace is saying something else.
If I never remember, does the reason really matter?
`~`
"The headphones," I whisper breathlessly, feeling like I'm swaying slightly. Like I'm on a boat?"
I hear someone hum, the sound reverberating through me somehow. "What about the headphones, Izumi?" A familiar voice asks, but I'm too focused on what I can remember.
Because the headphones are where I stopped trying to bring things up with my parents. When I stopped fighting Bakugou as much when I thought he was going too far in our 'goal'. Those damned headphones that I smashed against a wall after I woke up from a nightmare after Izuku disappeared. At the time I brushed what I heard off as my guilty mind poking at me again, but using All Might's voice this time. But…
"The quirkless are relics of a bygone era with no place in modern society. Heroes? Ha! Without quirks, they aren't even fit to live! The quirkless-"
That's all I heard before I smashed it. I mentioned it to mom afterwards, but she just brushed it off and said, "You don't need that anymore." I was confused at the time because guilt was eating away at me. I was… doing that.
But… what if it was something more? What Mom…
I shake my head, my mind focusing on why she gave me those headphones in the first place. "The… the… what was it? Why was I there?"
"Where, Izumi? Where were you?" That familiar voice talks again, and I like it. It's relaxing. So I answer absently while I try to think.
"The hospital. I was there. She gave them to me there. But why was I there?" If I can remember, maybe I can know. Why? Why did Mom give me headphones that said that about the quirkless when Izuku is quirkless?
I clench my eyes and use my hands to cover my ears, feeling a pang of regret as I block out the nice voice. I need to remember. I need to remember. "I need to remember…"
And… flashes come to me.
Fire. Screaming.
-
I push open a flaming door, thankful that the numerous holes mean I don't have to worry about the flames within rushing out at me. I hold my jacket over my mouth with my other hand as the stinging smoke forces tears from my eyes. It would be better to keep them narrowed to hopefully prevent damage. But instead they're wide open while I scramble through every room, searching.
-
I use my quirk to force my arm still, whimpering at the pain and how it bends the wrong way. But I push past it as I struggle to my feet.
-
I scream his name as the roof caves in.
"IZUKU!"
I barely even feel it when a needle breaks my skin, moments before darkness claims me and I remember nothing more.