Roselle's P.O.V
How do you react when you are leaving everything you have known behind just to start another in a country you have never been.
My job at the TV station, my favorite places to visit, Mrs. Janet's diner where I work part time on the weekends, it was really hard saying goodbye.
I don't have many friends, my sister was my only friend, I only have people I talk to sometimes.
I stare at all my suitcases on the floor, and I don't know where to start the packing from, I just stared numbly.
It's hard but I can't blame my parents for wanting to move, we all have ways of coping with grief.
Even if I would prefer staying where her memories lay, I know they can't bear the thought of sitting on a couch their child used to sit or walk the hallways she used to walk without breaking down in tears.
But I wish I had a choice in this too. I thought as silent tears fell down my eyes.
I'm so tired, I just want to stay wrapped in my sister's embrace but that's a wish thinking.
"Everything is going to be fine Rose" she would have said.
I long to hear her scold me for judging my skin, to hear her tell me about the boys she's crushing on, or to hear her rant about the friends she fought with.
I wouldn't even mind again if she took my things without permission.
I just need to hear her voice.
I cried and cried until I started heaving.
I prayed to God to bring my best friend back, but I got nothing.
I felt my heart getting tight and heavy, my nose soaked as tears rushed down my face.
"Why" I screamed.
"Why her" I whispered my vision blurry due to the tears.
"She was perfect, she knew no evil, so why her" I don't care if I look crazy talking to myself, but I just need someone to give me answers.
There are a lot of evil people out there that deserve to die but God just watches them to keep doing their evil and he takes the good people away from earth.
He took my sister away from earth.
I cried and cried until I couldn't feel myself again.
I cried for the loss of my best friend.
I cried for the loss of a sibling.
I cried for the world because they lost a good soul.
And I cried for myself because I don't know how I'm going to cope without her.
It should have been me then everyone would still have been happy.
I thought as sleep made me escape the broken heart I have.
...
This is it.
I thought as we stand in line at the airport waiting for our turn to enter the plane.
It was really hard leaving everything behind but there was no time to be emotional.
Lovette, I hope you find peace wherever you are.
...
No one said anything as we silently moved into the house, the truck with our loads will arrive in a day or two.
''Your room is by the left wing of the house, go out, relate and please find a purpose in life than locking yourself in your room, the only thing you're good at is eating and spending our money!"
My mum said harshly before walking away.
I look at my dad to see if he was going to say anything but as usual, he just ignored everything and followed his wife.
I took a deep breath and carried my suitcase up the stairs towards the left wing of the house, I'm used to those words now, but it doesn't hurt any less.
If Lovette was here she would have supported me instantly. I thought sadly.
My room isn't anything special just a plain wall with a bed and a table and chair by the side, to the right there are two doors, one leading to bathroom and one leading to the closet, I guess.
I jumped on the bed and allowed sleep to consume my sad mind.
"I should start applying for jobs by tomorrow " I whispered before I succumb to the darkness that was waiting for me, at least for a while I won't feel pain.
....
"Roselle" a familiar voice woke me from my slumber.
I opened my eyes and stared up at my dad.
"Dad?" I questioned sitting up.
He sat at the edge of my bed with a sad smile.
"Are you okay?" He asked and I look at him confused because first, this is strange.
I know it weird he's my dad and all, but we've never really had that bond, same thing with mum. But I was content since they were showering Lovette with all the love and attention, I know she won't feel left out like I always do. I was okay with however they treated me as long as they don't hurt her.
"I know we've been a little distant from you, but I just wanted to let you know we're there for you, okay, I know you're hurting, just don't keep it all bottled up, call mw anytime you feel that you need someone to talk to" he said gently, at first I discreetly pinched myself to be sure that I'm not dreaming and this is real and when I felt the sting, I realized I was actually very much awake so I just smiled, forcefully might I add because I think it's too late for them to be there for me now.
They had 22 years to do that!
"I'm okay " I said silently, and he nodded looking so sad and I almost reach out to him to comfort him, but I didn't.
Why should I?
"I'll leave you to sort your things out" he said before leaving and I gasp out, I didn't even know I was holding my breath.
Why is he trying to be caring now?
My mum is always the one who shows it that I'm obviously not her favorite daughter, but my dad is just always silent, he sees what she does but never comments.
And I know he doesn't like me either because they both treated my sister differently, so now what has changed?
He has no other choice than to notice his now only daughter? I scoffed.
I've always wished and prayed for their attention but now I don't know why I'm so annoyed.
I just want to be okay and be at peace, I don't need him to come into my life now that he has no other choice, is that too much to ask for?
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