"Teleport Block," Wiz said and with that, the interrogation room is complete.
I looked at the unconscious evil goddess bound on a chair and cuffed with enhanced adamantite cuffs. We wore her some of Darkness's spare clothing for her, a thin one piece sleeping pajamas. Yes, I intentionally make her wear that to make her feel vulnerable.
In front of her is a small desk with a glowing flower pointing at her. The flower is glowing in a dim blue light, but as soon as I fill it with mana, it will glow brighter.
"Alright, let's wake her up!" I snapped my fingers and the flower glows brightly.
The woman slowly opened her eyes. She tried shielding her eyes from the light, only to find herself cuffed and bound. "Wh-what is this? Re…" she gasped a little in exhaustion. "Release… me at once…"
"No can do miss evil god! You are Wolbach, a Demon King General," I told her. "If you cooperate we might let you go, if not, then, well, we'll make you cooperate."
She struggled a little before taking deep heavy breaths. The light from the plants are making her uncomfortable and made it almost hard for her to see our face.
Soon enough, she relented and sighed in defeat. "Well? What do you want?"
"Well, first of all, there's someone who wants to talk to you,"
I stepped aside and let the resident mad goddess have some words with her. I do wonder how a battle of words between two goddess will be like.
"Oi! I'm talking to you Wolbach! Tell me your plans! What are you going to do to my worshippers! Tell me your plans against this city!!! You sorry excuse of a goddess!!!"
"Worshippers? And how dare you call me a sorry excuse of a goddess!"
"Fine then, Evil Goddess!"
"Don't call me that either! You insolent mortal! It's because of those stupid idiots from Axis Order calling me Evil God that I just have no choice but to roll with it!"
"You dare call my worshipper stupid idiots!? The only one here stupid here is you, for saying such things in front of the great Goddess Aqua!"
"As if I believe an idiot like you to be a goddess!"
"The only idiot here is you, you evil goddess!!!"
Aqua closed her eyes before opening it. I don't know what she did, but the air around us become a little bit humid and Wolbach seethed in anger.
"Goddammit… If it isn't their believers, it has to be their goddesss…"
"You got a problem with me, evil god? At least I have people believing in me! Unlike you!"
"I have believers in the Demon King Army too!! And you are just a super minor god compared to Goddess Eris anyway!! You retarded idiot!"
"You DARE call me a retard!?"
"With a worshipper like them, it's just common sense at this point!"
"AAH! Enough! Just tell me what you're planning!"
The answer: They both fight like a bunch of elementary school children arguing about their favorite super hero. Geez, no wonder Vanir went so far as to summon other god from another universe. If this is how the real gods behave, this world is doomed!
I increased the light output and the evil god cringed.
"Just tell us what you're planning Wolbach."
"Fuck it! I'm dead anyway! It's Hans, he's planning to pollute the water source of the Axis Order," she explained. "The guy is a poison slime if you don't know. He's a pain to deal with so unless you have someone of Wiz's calibre on your side, then don't even bother,"
I moved the light to point at Wiz. The Lich just waved at Wolback with a sheepish smile on her face.
"Of course you did," Wolbach looked down a little. "Strongest Adventurer… Goddammit, you're Satou Kazuma, aren't you?"
"Yep,"
"Fuck, damn it, if you're here then…"
I pointed my light at Megumin who just looked at her flatly.
Wolbach stopped struggling and has that unreadable look on her face as Megumin sat down in front of her.
"Ano… Wolbach sensei…" her voice was much more nervous than the rest of us. "Do you, do you remember me?"
"No,"
Ring
Wolbach turned towards me with an incredulous look on her face. "Seriously!? Are you fucking kidding me?! This can't be a coincidence, you've been planning to capture me, no one in their right mind would bring an interrogation bell into vacation!"
"Actually, I just teleported back to Axel, borrowed it from a friend of mine, then return here," I explained simply. "Look, just answer truthfully Wolbach, you remember my girlfriend, she remembers you, now skip the battlefield drama and kiss already."
Megumin didn't say anything for a moment. "Why did you lie Wolbach?"
The evil god looked down a little and bit her lip. "I will not tell you,"
I turned to Megumin. "Should I use my advanced succubus mind magic to forcefully enter her subconscious, dig through the darkest pits of her mind, reveal all her dirties secret, before revealing it to everyone here?"
Wolbach looked between me and the magic bell in panic. "Oi, oi, this has to be a joke right? There's no bloody way you know succubus mind magic,"
I smirked and took out my adventurer card for her to see.
The evil god paled a little at the sight of it. "You… No, no fucking way…"
"If it wasn't clear from the start, you don't get to demand us anything, now tell her. Why did you lie to her?"
Wolbach looked down and sighed. "I wanted her to hate me…"
Megumin simply nodded at that. "Why though?"
"Because…" she bit her lip and looked away from me. "One of them is because I want to be killed with explosion magic,"
Well then, I can see why Megumin's an explosion maniac…
"The other is because by using explosion magic I reduce myself into pure magic and lived on within my other half. Wherever it might be,"
I nodded a little. "I see, so you feel ashamed and regret what you've become, partly because of the Axis Order, and wanted to have a new start. The only way to do that is use your other half, that is Chomsuke, Megumin's adorable pet cat, and start over, right?"
Wolbach just stared at me blankly. "You must be best friends with Vanir, aren't you?"
"Kinda, why?"
"You both have a LOT in common…"
"Ne, Wolbach sensei…" Megumin said, a little bit less nervous this time. "Will you, will you surrender peacefully?"
"I can't,"
"Because of all your worshipper in the demon king army?"
"Yes, I simply cannot betray them,"
Megumin sighed a little. "Then… Will you, will you at least promise not to get in our way?"
"I can't,"
"I understand…" Megumin then turned towards me. "Kazuma… Is there any crazy idea you can think of? Something that only you would be able to come up with? This can't be harder than our main mission right?"
I rubbed my chin in deep thought. "You're right, saving Wolbach can't be harder than reconstructing the entire Axis Order's system of belief, turn all the Axis Cultist into a decent human being, and fix their reputation with the general populace…" I muttered to myself.
"I'm sorry, you're trying to what?" Wolbach asked in disbelief.
"Exactly that, harder than somehow getting you on our side right?"
Wolbach tried to stutter out a retort for that logic, but all that came out was an incoherent rambling and a ring from the interrogation bell.
After a moment of thinking, an idea came to me.
"Oh, I know! How about we make ALL her believers revolt to the Demon King army?"
Megumin nodded in agreement. "Yes, that should work! I mean, Wolbach can simply give the order as their goddess right? If they refuse, then that's heresy!"
Wolbach shook her head furiously at that. "No, no I will never resort to such lowly measure! To abuse my powers like that…"
"I think this is a good chance to make a proper religion too, I mean, you don't even have a proper priest,"
"I can't do something like that!"
Ring
"AAAH!!! Shut up you stupid bell! Fine, I won't, not that I can't! That is something only a retard like Aqua would do!"
"I heard that!" the said retard exclaimed.
"In other words, we have a plan, now we just need to convince her, should we do this the easy way or the hard way?"
Megumin turned towards me. "What's the easy way and what's the hard way?"
"The easy way is with mind magic. The hard way is giving her the Darkness treatment,"
"NO!!!"
It wasn't only Megumin who said no. Almost everyone in the room voiced their disagreement in my sound argument.
"Have mercy on her senpai,"
"That's fate worse than death!"
"Kazuma, I'd rather have you kill her than let you do that,"
And many more begging for mercy came from those who's from my side. I mean, what the hell? Aren't we supposed to be interrogating Wolbach right now?
"Ano, Megumin," Wolbach said suddenly. "I don't want to know, but let me ask anyway, what's the Darkness Treatment?"
Megumin gave Wolbach a look of pity. "Do you know about the Tentacle Vine Plants living deep inside the devil keep forest?"
The Evil God gasped a little after hearing that. She looked at me in shock and horror. "You'd go as far as to take me there?"
"No, I have cultivated it," I pointed the light at a certain crusader. "That's Darkness, I use her as my personal seedbed to get myself some new seeds after selling her purity to the said monster, hence the name 'Darkness Treatment'. Oh and it's not just the plant, we also have some weapon testing, skill spell combo tests, and many more,"
"You would…" she looked at Darkness and mistaking the horny look on her face as that of defeat and humiliation. "Fo-forget the demon king, you're… You're already ten times worse than the Demon King. You're…" Wolbach gulped a little and turned to Megumin. "And you, Megumin, you're in a… relationship with him?"
Megumin just sighed a little. "To be fair, he hired a succubus to force us together,"
"Don't put it like THAT!"
Wolbach shook her head and chuckled mirthlessly. "Forget it, you all win… I, it's simply within my best interest not to stand in the way of a monster like you," she looked at me, her face much calmer after accepting her defeat. "Kazuma, I hereby pledge my loyalty to you, your wish is my command, I swear it on my Divinity…"
There was a flash of light and some sort of a tingling sensation on my chest. "Wait, does that mean I just have a literal goddess as my subordinate?"
"Yep," Megumin said. "Congratulations!"
"Should I be worried?"
"Of course not," Aqua said. "Wolbach is just one of those super lesser, minor goddess. Having her as your subordinate is just another one of your privilege as a hero of Axel."
I walked towards Wolbach and helped her out of her cuffs.
"Okay then Wolbach, you can go back and start preaching to your faithful believers about the revolt, but make is super subtle okay?" I told her. "Don't worry about Hans, we'll wrap up things with him later, though, don't expect us to spare him if he put too much resistance."
"Yes, yes, I get it!" Wolbach exclaimed. "Now give me back my power,"
I handed her one of my adamantite necklace. "Here, should be enough to get you in shape, I expect weekly report send to our party's secretary," I shut off the flashlight, turned on the room's light. "The party's secretary is not here, but you can find us in the adventurer's guild in Axel. Just say that you're an evil god looking for Satou Kazuma, it shouldn't be hard."
"Alright, I get it," the woman rolled her eyes. "I will take my leave now… master…" she whispered the last part before taking a deep breath.
"Tele-"
"Wait!"
Megumin cut her off mid spell.
"What?"
"Ano…" the crimson demon looked back at Wiz standing in the corner. "Wiz… Can you bring Chomsuke over here?"
The Lich looked at the adorable cat in her hands before looking back at Megumin.
"Are you sure Megumin?"
"It's okay, now that she's no longer an enemy, it's not right for me to keep it from her,"
Wiz walked towards Megumin and handed the cat to her. The crimson demon looked at the black cat in her hands before hugging it for the last time. The cat was oddly docile in her hands and rubbed its head on her face.
After a moment, Megumin let go of the cat and simply put her on the interrogation table. The cat took one look at Megumin before slowly walking towards her other half.
"Thank you, Megumin," Wolbach said.
"You're welcome, Chomsuke,"
Wolbach paused for a moment and tilted her head.
"I'm sorry?"
"Chomsuke,"
"But I'm…"
"Chomsuke,"
Wolbach turned towards me and I simply shrugged a little.
"Alright, fine…" Wolbach grabbed the cat with both hands. "I will take my leave now, take care,"
"Teleport!"