° Enzo °
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The stars...the constellations... everything which shone bright, faded away when I looked at her watching the sky. She had said, it felt like 'home'.... I wish she only knew, that we have been looking at the same 'home' since... forever.
The music from the dance out there changes and it suddenly grabs my attention. I get this idea, and before I can think about it twice, her name rolls off my tongue, oh so naturally.
It's always been like that with her, as if I don't have to think before speaking. As if I can just be myself.
"Julia?"
"Yeah?" she looks at me to find my hand infront of her. Confused she tilts her head, wanting a clarification.
"About that dance we missed... Shall we have that dance now?"
"You read a lot of romance novels, don't you?" her lip twitches into a smile and I can't help but look into her eyes sparkle when she smiles.
"Only the ones written by women." I state and she grins and says, "yes, those are the ones truly worth reading if you were to read romance."
"So..what do you say? A wedding date without a dance, is incomplete. Don't you think?"
"I guess!" she nods.
"So, shall we?"
and at that she holds my hand.
The breeze from the sea, and the chill of the night wasn't enough to take away the warmth of her touch.
I hesitantly pull her closer and hover my hands near her waist, "May I?"
She bites onto her lower lip at that, which makes me want to do the same. I shake that thought away, afraid I might actually do it if I keep thinking about it.
"Yes" she almost whispers after a few seconds of thinking. And I do just that. I put my hands on the side of her waist and feel her body getting tensed.
"You sure, you're okay with this?"
She nods and I move my hands slowly to the small of her back. I feel her grasp getting tighter on my shoulder.
I get this urge to pull her even closer, to reduce the distance between us to nearly nothing, but I'm afraid it's something I might have to reschedule.
"Can you look up at me?" I ask and her eyes flutter up to look into mine.
Exactly the way I remember since I first saw her. The same eyes. Like, someone had stolen the biggest pearls from the Ocean's treasure and had turned them into shining, glistening black pearls.
"Miss Morias, tell me something?" I ask as we move slowly to the faint music coming from the party out there.
"Yes, Dr. Torres?" she looks at me eagerly.
When I talk and she does that - looking up at me - like I'm about to say the most important thing that has ever been said, it makes me feel like something or someone just squeezed the heart inside of me.
It's always have been me, who listens to people. But to have someone who wants to listen to me, that too, so earnestly, the thought of it makes me want to -
Okay, Enzo, you're wanting a lot of things....!
"Enzo?" her voice pulls me out of the trance I had successfully descended into, while I looked into her eyes.
"Yeah.. um..."
wait what was I gonna say?
Damn it, she makes me forget everything else...
"Ummmmm what?" she chuckles.
"I actually forgot what I was gonna say."
She laughs out loud at that.
I don't know what caused it. But it's the most beautiful sound to exist.
To listen to her laugh, to those giggles, those chuckles, and to see that smile on her face, I think I would without a second thought, become a part-time stand up comedian if I have to be!
Well part time because, shows would be only for her, while she dances with me in my arms. Even if we're not holding on to each other that closely, I can feel her warmth. That's maybe because I feel it within.
"I thought I was the silent one." she pouts her lips a little.
Aw crap.
How can someone be so adorable.
Focus, Enzo.
Do not look at her lips for so long that you zone out and do something you don't plan on-
"I was thinking about the stars." I look up and she does too.
"What about them?"
"Just how they witness everything. And know what we don't."
She looks at my face and I feel the need to change the subject.
"So... Why didn't you bring your binoculars?"
"Uh- wh-what?" she suddenly looks at me as if I've said something she was not expecting.. at all!
"To look at the stars, I mean." I say, "you like doing that, don't you?"
"Yes..."she replies, unsure if she should admit or not ...
I wonder, what is she so awkward about?
"Um..actually, I wasn't aiming on that man's balcony. I was looking up at the stars and when I moved it down it was accidentally aimed there, at the exact time he came out." she says it all in a breath, and I have no idea what she's taking about.....
"What man? There was another person out there...I didn't notice."
"The man in the building exactly in front of ours. I swear, I'm not a stalker."
"Okay? And why do you think that I would think you're a stalker?"
"Because that man happens to be my ex?"
Ah, I see the confusion now.
I laugh and she blinks fast clearly not understanding a thing.
"Julia. I don't think you're a stalker. And I sure as hell don't care if he was your ex or some random person." I clarified, "to be honest, my eyes were only on you that night."
Wait, what did I just say?
"I mean, I didn't notice anyone else. I just thought you had nice binoculars. And I enjoy star gazing at times. That's what I was gonna say, before you ran into your house."
"Oh!" she says with an awkward smile making me laugh.
"Yes. Now I know why you did that! God, you're cute."
She lets out a breathy giggle and I pull her closer again.
"I saw those binoculars on your table too. I think they're a great pair." I say unsure, if I should...
"Thank you. They're very old! I've had them since I was a lil girl. That was a gift actually." she says and her smile fades away a little.
I knew I shouldn't have brought that up- but I had to.. I had to know.
How do I make her smile again?
I look up at the stars. The weather is indeed very clear tonight and I was in luck!
"Look up." I say and she does.
"There..." I point my index and she tries to look where I'm pointing at....
"That's the Capricorn." I say and her nose scrunches up a little as she tries to point it out...
I take her hands into mine and point it where it was.
It brings back feelings I've had not felt since so so long...
"Ah yes. It looks like a heart." she looks up filled with child like joy. My heart feels heavy. But like, in a good way...
"What are you talking about? It's surely a puppy." I try to mess with her, and she narrows her eyes at me.
"No. It's not. Look again." She takes my hands this time, and I can't help but look at her, and not the sky.
"There.." she draws a heart in the empty with my index and tries to show me how she was right...
"Ohhhh..." I say teasing her... "I seeee it now..!"
"I'm always right, when it comes to the stars." she states proudly.
"Yes. You are. You've learnt well."
Someone calls on her phone that was down on the wooden verandah we were sitting on earlier.
She lets go of my hand, and yet I still feel them there.
She picks up the phone and talks with who ever is on the call.
"I'm afraid, today's 'constellations with Julia' lecture has to end. We should go back to the party. That was Lily and she was asking for us." she announces.
"Aw. I wish it would have not ended so soon. It's kind of like my favorite class now." I pout and she laughs.
She grabs her phone and walks away. I grab my jacket as I run and join her.
And before we know, we are back into the chaos. But I am still playing those 45minutes with her in my head.
Again and again.
I guess, it's what I'm gonna do until I get to be with her again.
••••
(Author's note: this was the first pov chapter of Enzo. There's gonna be a few more of these...
I really enjoyed writing this chapter. I hope you enjoyed reading it as well.)