"Elena? Are you here?" I can hear my own voice bounce off the walls. I enter a great smelling kitchen. The wood stove is already lit. The pots are boiling over with broths of all types, and unattended.
"It's amazing how you are able to cook for the whole community." I don't realize that I am talking to myself. But when you enter a kitchen you know that the presence of the cook remains even after they leave. I grab a towel and peak into one of the pots.
"Ay!" A sharp pain shoots up my arm from my hand.
"That's what you get for peeking." Elena places the wooden spoon back on her table.
"When did you come back into the room?" I rub my sore hand. "You're as silent as a cat."
"I doubt it. With these shoes?"
"We both know that you like to be barefoot in the kitchen, Elena." She lifts up her skirt a bit off the floor, revealing slender feet looking as delicate as her hands, but with a definite strength in her ankles.
Elena smiles. "You found me out."
"Do I get a prize?" I suddenly catch myself and begin to stammer. "I meant the food of course. Perhaps a taste. A sample." But Elena turned away almost immediately at my ruse.
Elena mumbles. "Perhaps later. After your…"
"What's all this that you are cooking?" I change the topic.
"Um, yes, the cooking. It's all in preparation for Milagros surprise later tonight." The redness in her cheeks fade away.
"She's not cooking for the whole community too?" I look around at the kitchen taking in visually as much as my olfactory sense can inhale.
"Oh no. She doesn't have the experience," Elena places her arms across her chest," or "the want to work that much. She only does what she can for you." Elena turns towards a pot and gently stirs the contents. "She thinks that she will be caring you for the rest of her life."
"Oh no! I don't think I will last that much longer." I half joke at my own expense. Only half. "Besides, she needs to live her own life."
"And what type of life do you want to live, Alvaro Gael?"
Elena flips around and puts her hands on her hips. A cute scowl flashes across her face. No one can feel threatened by her, at least physically. Her attitude, however, can carry her far.
"I don't know really. What with everything that has happened to my body." I glance at the reflection in a small mirror hanging on the nearby wall. "I can barely care for myself as it is.
I don't have the strength or durability to do much."
"The self pity needs to stop." Elena continues with her cute but annoyed face.
"It's not pity. I know I have limitations. I'm not going to downplay my handicaps."
I watch her place some picadillo onto a plate. She carries it over to the pot and, with a ladle, spoons out some frijoles. She adds some queso fresco to the side along with a soft, warm corn tortilla. I feel like I am being treated like royalty. At least I think it's for me. Right? I hope.
"It's just, well the way the world works. The strong survive, the rich progress, and the healthy live to see goals to fruition. I don't fall in any of those categories. At least before, the accident and the loss of Milagros mother, I had health and a bit of strength."
"Alvaro, you have learned to survive with what little you have." Elena's face softens.
"Not alone." I turn my eye at the ground.
"And your miracle came about from the worst event in your life."
"Yes." She's right. Milagros is indeed a miracle.
"So don't throw everything to the wayside, especially yourself, because of the sadness in your life. Life has to go on. And you, don't have to be alone, if you so choose." Elena places the warm plate in front of me. My mouth begins to water.
"You're very sweet, Elena. And I have never taken the time to thank you for all that you have done for me and Milagros."
"Ay! Por favor! You say it all the time, Alvaro."
"Not with enough meaning. Or heart." My words come out as I temporarily lose composure for a second. She places her hand on top of mine as I reach for the tortilla.
Elena tilts my face towards her. My good eye catches her glance and I try to look away. "I mean it."
"Mean what?" A shudder goes down my spine.
"I mean it when I say you don't have to do this alone, Alvaro." Her eyes locked with my one.
"Oh, um, I'm not looking to have anyone in my life, right now. Or ever really. It's just…well who would want someone in their life like me? Look at me."
Elena keeps me focused on her. She grabs onto the side of my face . "I do look at you. And see so much more than the wounds you see in the mirror. I see the man inside. The loving father. The hard worker. The kind soul."
"Well there's Milagros…". And then I stop mid sentence. "Where is she?"
This time Elena regains her composure. "She should have been back by now." Elena quickly removes her hand from mine and rushes to look out the doorway. She is as worried as I am.
"I think I should go find her. Maybe, I'm afraid for nothing. But I'll feel better if the three of us were together." I jolt out of my seat and I feel a burning pain down my back.
"I understand." Elena clasps her hands together at the waist. "Go. If you need me to help…"
"Thank you, but no Elena. Stay here in case she returns."
"Sí. Be careful Alvaro. Por favor."
"I will." I cross myself out of habit ,despite my diminishing faith, and step onto the street.
…