The next week passed in a lonely blur of commotion. No one came to check in to see how I was doing and I didn't reach out to follow up with any of the conversations that I had with those closest to me. I was too hurt to try and repair any relationships right now. I spent most of my time wandering along the barrier reading, trying to enjoy the last few days of freedom before my impending marriage.
With only three weeks before the wedding, our peddler arrived in town. Twice a year, Matthew Gilmore will ride up on his teetering wagon with his team of horses and provide relief and excitement over his wares. No one was entirely sure why or how this happened that an outsider could come in and out as the please, but we were grateful that Matthew Gilmore and the others before him came at all to kindly provide things from the outside world. I know Abigail would be looking through his fabric later today and wished I could join her and her family to pick out the most beautiful cloth to create delectable pieces. I also know they were not going to be able to choose much the way their business has been.
Matthew Gilmore was the master of trading our valuables for his. He drove his team into town and parked in the town center and smiled fondly at each prospective buyer as they bargained for his deals. Looking sweet and calm, his balding hair and peppered beard enticed many just to talk with him, but I knew most people waited for his stories tonight and would be camping around his fire tonight to hear tales of the outside world. It was what we craved the most for these tales, and I got excited for the first time since the lottery for something new to break up my depressing routine.
Though I didn't have anything to trade, I spent the day in the town square watching the exchanges happening. Everyone was there that day and I saw everyone in groups of two or three, prepared to barter or trade with anyone who would listen. Catherine and Aaron Gerard stood by Matthew as they helped with the lines and battering happening among the townsfolk. Clara was with Wilson, looking stiff being looped arm in arm as he tried to trade some wooden statues, which he was so famous for. I saw Abigail with her parents and my father laughing boisterously among his friends, already appearing tipsy as they watched the people's excitement. Like a shadow, I was ignored but got to enjoy the brightness from the people around me and it lifted my spirits just a fraction.
After a few hours, Matthew called for a rest and people started heading home for a few hours of rest themselves. Not having anywhere to go, I stayed seated in my spot, watching those depart until only a few stragglers stayed back, chatting among themselves. I got a nod from Catherine Gerard as she passed me, not hiding her smirk from her lips, while her son just scowled at me, trying to scare me to stay quiet about his secret. I did my best to ignore both of them, not wanting to dwell on anything but this day.
An hour after Matthew's announcement, I saw him leave his covered wagon and he eyed me suspiciously before walking over. My heart thrilled at the thought of talking to him and I nervously straightened out my dress, hoping I wasn't too much of a mess.
When he arrived, he put on a big smile before speaking. "Is it fine with you that I sit? I need a bit of fresh air and good company."
I nodded, and he sat next to me. He extended his hand and I took it.
"Matthew's my name. What's yours?"
"Lisbeth er, Lis."
"Mighty fine name you have there Lis" he proclaimed before sticking his hands in his pockets. "Mind if I smoke my pipe Lis?"
"Please, help yourself." I shifted my body, so I could face him, watching as he took out his pipe and lit it until smoke came billowing out. I breathed in the tiny bit of smoke, bitter but pleasant all the same. "I hope you're getting lucky with your trading, Matthew. I know as townsfolk, we are always pleased when you visit.
Matthew took another inhale of his pipe. "It's my duty young Lis, to be able to cross the barrier. It is a blessing and curse all in one. I have knowledge of so many worlds, but only I am not allowed to settle and have a home of my own or neighbors to smile upon.
I frowned, lowering my gaze to my hands. "I promise you, I would switch lives in a heartbeat. I also have no choices, but duty and honor and I only wish to leave this area once and for all."
Matthew chuckled. "So passionate! What of your family and neighbors. If I remember your traditions correctly, you will soon have a husband and children to call your own."
"I will give it all up for a new life, a new experience. I just want a bit of freedom from this prison I call Cromerth."
Matthew stood up and faced away from me, silently smoking his pipe. I did not expect my conversation to fill with the dread of my future to slip up, but it did, and I instantly felt better being able to voice my opinion instead of faking a smile through the weeks. Matthew sighed and turned to me, eyes losing their laughter and seriousness washed over his face.
"Do you mean what you said Lis? Would you give all this up and relocate to a new land?"
My heart beat faster at his words and I jumped passionately up to face him head on. "I would."
"Then I got a deal for you." He snuffed out his pipe and put it back into his pocket. "Follow me back into the wagon and let's make a deal."
Without another word I followed him into his cramped covered wagon, full of hanging merchandise and a tiny bed that filled the corner of his space. No seats were available to sit at, so I remained slumped inside, waiting for his instructions.
"Sit and I will discuss the deal" said Matthew as he reached inside a canvas bag that hung from a hook. "I got a letter here that could be useful for ya."
Hesitantly, I took a seat. "Can I read it?"
"You can read?"
"Yes. My father blessed me with knowing how to read and use numbers at a young age. He thought it was important for me to be able to help my husband if he was part of a trade."
"You're father is a smart man" Matthew smiled, and my heart ached at his announcement.
"He was. He took my mother's death hard" I confessed and saw the pity reach Matthew's eyes and he wisely decided not to comment.
I waited until Matthew pulled out the paper and handed it to me and took a step back. I relaxed at the distance he tried to put between us as I read the letter in front of me.
"Dear Matthew,
As you may recall, Meredith has unfortunately passed away a few months back and I am in desperate need to replace her. I am in need of a humble, kind youth who can cook, clean, garden and help run the estate if I am ever in need of it. Please keep an eye out on your travels if any such person is available and willing to leave their home to come to mine. I am willing to help with your infamous deal as well.
Sincerely,
Lord Duvan of Conkett"
I reread the letter a few times before slowly handing it back to Matthew. I comprehended the task. In exchange for my freedom, I would become a servant for a big house. I had the skills requested in the letter and I am sure I would satisfy Lord Duvan if I arrived there to replace his faithful servant, Meredith.
"What are you thinking Lis?"
"I am thinking that no matter what I am going to have to become a servant, either here with my family or in a new place without them. At least now I am given a choice and that is all I really wanted in the end."
Matthew sighed and put the letter back into his pocket. He raised the flap from his wagon and made a gesture, so I could get up.
"Leaving family is tough. I shouldn't have assumed you would consider. My apologies if I offended you."
I gaped and shook my head, refusing to stand. "No Matthew, you got it wrong. I have a choice now and I choose to go! I cannot stay here, and I am ready for this change. I am ready to make a deal."
Matthew gazed at me long and hard before dropping the flap. A smile sprung from his face, showing his yellowed teeth as he reached out his hand. "Let's complete this deal then, shall we? I promise, you won't be sorry!"
I can honestly say, he was a little wrong with his promise.