SANTI'S POV
The first thing I encounter in the morning as soon as I wake up is Carla's face, which makes me quickly get away from her and look at the clock to see what time it is, and when I see it's six in the morning, I looked at her without understanding anything.
"What are you doing up so early?" I asked, surprised to see Carla awake so soon. "Because unlike you, I couldn't sleep the whole damn night." She protested, but still had a smile on her face. "Why?"
"Why would it be? After all this time, it turns out Jessica wasn't dead and you take it so easy." my best friend said, snorting at the end, "Well, yeah because at least I know she's not three meters underground." I responded, shrugging my shoulders. "All this time you slept like shit, and now that she's alive and you're not far away, you can sleep that peacefully?" She asked, surprised. "As I already told you, the only thing that matters to me is that she's okay, the rest doesn't matter to me." I said sincerely.
"And did you talk to her about the life she had before?" He asked curiously and I denied, because I didn't do it, and I don't really want to do it either. "Why?" she asked "Because she's the one who must decide if she wants to know it or not." "Are you going to tell me you plan to let Jessica escape after all this time?" She asked more than surprised, but I denied, because that's not what I was planning to do either. "Obviously I'm not going to let her escape now that I found her again and alive, but I also can't force her to find out what her life was like before."
"Then you're not going to tell her until she asks you to." She said "Yes, but that's why there won't be a problem because she accepted." I revealed "Then there's something that escapes my understanding." Carla said, leaning back on the couch. "And what is it?" I asked, "If she agreed to know what her life was like before, why the hell didn't you let me tell her what was going on between you?" She questioned with a confused face. "Because at no time have, I said I'm going to tell her what was between us."
"But that's stupid, it's part of the life she lost and which she wants to find out about. Are you really not going to tell her anything at all?" Carla asked and I denied "No. What if she feels she has to reciprocate what was between us? I wouldn't let that happen." I responded, "I just can't believe it. Are you really that stupid to think she would think she should reciprocate your feelings?"
"Well yes." I responded, shrugging my shoulders "Well let me tell you friend, you're stupid. After almost kissing yesterday in the doorway, and you think you'd force her to have feelings for you?" She asked with a tone that told me she couldn't believe what I'm saying "I don't know. I just know I don't want to tell her. If she wants to feel something, let it be for herself and not because we tell her."
"Okay… I can understand your point of view." My best friend said, looking out the window, "I'm glad." I said even though in case she said otherwise, I wouldn't think to listen to her, "Now, can you tell me why you're up so early?" I asked again since she haven't answered me before. "One, as I already told you, I can't sleep, and two, we have to go get Miky because I remind you, in case you didn't hear yesterday, we are going to take care of him."
"I heard it, why wouldn't I?" I defended myself, "Man, you spent the whole afternoon staring at Jessica, and you didn't hear anything unless she spoke." Carla responded laughing "And what do you want me to do? I can't help it." I said laughing "I know, but should I tell you something?"
"You already have." I said, unable to help but laugh, "Don't be stupid, that's not what I meant." she responded, rolling her eyes. "Well, say it." I replied, "I'm glad to see you like this... happy after all this time... You got better just by seeing her." she said with a smile on her face "You know very well she's my life. I could never have gotten over her death and you know it."
"I realized it in these four years, but you know it's something she wouldn't like." Carla pointed out "You know? She's still the same as it was years ago." I said, remembering the time I had spent with her yesterday. "Why do you say that?" She asked curiously. "Because she said it was better for them to think she was dead."
"That's nothing like the Jessica of years ago." She noted, "Of course." I responded "Then explain to me, because I don't understand." She asked, "Jess said it because she doesn't want anyone to suffer." I stated and Carla frowns "But no one will suffer, they will be glad she's alive." Carla said, getting up from the couch and starting to walk from one side to the other. "I told her that."
"We should call them... Tell them she's alive." she said, stopping in her tracks and starting to look for what I assume is her phone "I don't think it's the best thing. Before you say anything, I know they should know, but I don't think it's appropriate to say it over the phone, they'll think we're crazy."
"Maybe, but…" she started, but I denied "Besides, it has to be Jess who decides to see them. We're not going to tell her anything so that later she decides she doesn't want to know anything about them." I said, because I could get the idea of what would happen if we told them and then Jessica didn't want to know anything about us. "That can't happen. Jess has to come home." She murmured, "I know, but right now for her, this is her home."
"Everything seems strange to me. She's the person who remembered practically everything, and now forgot everything and doesn't remember shit." she protested, sighing at the end of frustration. "I understand... But I have to tell you something." I started "I understand... I think I trust that boy who helps you at the table... You should stay with her; we can't afford to lose her again."
"You really won't object?" I asked, surprised, and she laughed. "Do you really think I'll stop you after yesterday morning I saw you looking better than in recent years? I'm not going to separate you from her, she's your happiness and I'm not going to allow anything or anyone to separate you from her." She reported "Thank you Carla, really, thank you very much."
"Don't thank me, just promise me that depressed Santi won't come back." He asked and I denied, "With Jess by my side he won't come back." I said, because that's more than clear to me. Now what I had to do is worry about convincing Jess she had to come home. "I'm glad to hear that. Now let's go to Jess's apartment because we have to go get Miky."
"You quickly became attached to the boy; I didn't expect that." I said, laughing "He's a great guy and he really cares about her. Plus, we talked about a lot of things and told me what Jessica's life was like now. For your information, she's single."
My smile widened and it didn't take us much longer to leave the hotel room. As soon as we got to the building they lived in and were a couple of doors away from their apartment, we noticed Jessica standing in the doorway and screaming, I have to assume she forgot her keys. It didn't take long for the dog to start growling in our direction and showing us its teeth a little, which made Carla take a step back.
"Wow, calm down, boy." Jessica turned in our direction, but she didn't exactly look at us, and she seemed frustrated, which is strange. Maybe she didn't wake up in a good mood, I don't have the slightest idea, I just know something isn't right with her.
"Jessica, is that you?" I think that's the stupidest question Carla could ask, because it's obviously her, and when we were going to get a little closer to help her, Miky appears at the door and stares at her for a couple of seconds. "What are you doing standing here?" the boy asked "I was calling you for ten minutes, but as always you decided to put on your damn headphones. Can't you turn the volume down?"
"Sorry... it just helps me think." He apologized, "Please pick up the keys from the floor and help me get into the house." Jess asked in a frustrated tone, "Are you not seeing anything again?" the boy asked, straightening up and seconds later, doing what Jessica had told him. "Do you think I like standing in front of the door for the love of art?" she asked ironically.
At this moment I'm not understanding anything. How come she didn't see anything again? What the hell was going on here? Thousands of questions were running through my head and in a moment, Carla pushes me to clear my thoughts and enter the house. Once inside, Miky takes Jessica to the couch and the dog lies down next to her once she is seated.
They also began to argue, and both I and Carla looked at each other without understanding anything. In the end, the boy ended up going somewhere in the house and it didn't take much longer for Carla to follow him, meanwhile I stood there without understanding anything or what I could do.
"I'm sorry you had to see this. I think it's best for you to go." Jessica said and I denied, because now I would do it less than before. "What's wrong with you Jessica?" I asked softly "Nothing. I want to be alone…please." my former girlfriend asked "I couldn't leave you like this Jessica... I could never do something like that."
"You were able to get used to it in these four years... I'm actually used to it... so better let me... Please..." she said and I stayed frozen where I was. This wasn't the Jessica I knew. I don't think I've ever seen Jessica like that in my life. Out of nowhere she got up and walked towards the terrace they had with the dog behind her and scratching the door for her to open it and she did. I soon lost sight of her and I was left standing there wondering what could be happening to Jessica.
"And Jess?" It is at that moment I realize both Carla and the child are looking at me, closer than Carla and looking at me waiting for me to answer the question. "On the terrace." I answered, looking in the direction she had left a while ago and the boy headed that way and stayed for a while looking in the direction where Jessica was.
"I know it's a stupid thing to ask you, but could you stay and take care of Jessica?" Carla asked next to me, but I didn't look away from the terrace door. "What's wrong with her?" I asked, looking for a brief time at my best friend. "She didn't tell me, but it can't be very good. I want to get him out of here so he can clear his mind a little and see if I can get out of him what's happening to Jessica."
"Guys, I can't go. "'m sorry you had to come for nothing." The boy said sadly once he re-entered the apartment. "Nothing about that, sir, you're coming with me." Carla said with a smile "But…" the boy began to want to protest "Santi will be taking care of Jessica, don't worry about her, she will be well taken care of."
"I will take care of her with my life." I assured "Ok... Oh, before I forget... Don't pay attention to anything she tells you... When this happens, she gets in a very bad mood..." he informed "Ok How is she now?" I asked, worried about the state of my former girlfriend. "She's asleep, I think she didn't sleep at all tonight... The pills are in that closet, she'll probably need them when she wakes up... Anything, please call me." He asked and I nodded "I will, don't worry and go with Carla. Take care of her, she's too clueless."
"I'm not that much." Carla tried to defend herself, "Of course you are, but I know Miky isn't." I said, trying to cheer the boy up, and lucky me, because I managed to get a small smile from him and after a couple of minutes they left the apartment, leaving me with Jessica and the dog. I headed towards the terrace where she was and when I arrived, the dog raised its head and looked at me without much confidence and I stood in the place Miky recently occupied, looking in Jessica's direction.
I don't know how long it takes until Jessica starts to move and ends up opening her eyes looking straight ahead. I kept quiet, mostly because I don't want to bother her and make her mood worse. "You could have gone with them. I made it very clear to you I wanted to be alone." Jess said seriously, "And I told you I wasn't going to leave you like this."
"I'm old enough to know how to take care of myself. I don't need a babysitter." She said with frustration evident in her voice, "I'm not here to be your babysitter." I assured "Then why?" She asked, turning in my direction. "Because you're an important person to me." I admitted, "That person died four years ago. "I'm not the same Jessica you remember and I won't be again."
"You may not be the same Jessica as you were four years ago, but I love you... I love you and I'm not going to let anything happen to you." I said, holding back from telling her the way I really love her. At that point she got up from the couch and entered the house. Apparently, she could see, so I was somewhat calmer in that regard, but apparently Jess is in a worse mood than before. She went to the closet where Miky had told me the pills were, grabbed two bottles and a few of each and then went to the door grabbing her things.
"Where are you going?" I asked, confused. "Work, not all of us have the money your friend has." She responded "But Miky said…" I started, but she denied "Miky isn't at home and I have to go to work. You can go with him and Carla now, because I don't need your help." She responded, "I promised him I would take care of you, and that's what I'm going to do."
"But it's not necessary." He said with a sigh at the end, "Okay, not necessary, but then I'll go get a coffee at the coffee shop you work at." I responded, trying in some way not to make her angrier than she is at the moment. "Whatever you want, we better go now because I don't want to be late."
We left the house and walked to her work without saying a single word. After ten minutes walking, she entered a coffee shop and I followed her. Once inside, a not very old man, probably around forty, sees her and approaches her with a surprised look. "Jessica, what are you doing here?" he asked, approaching where she is. "As far as I know, I work here, so I think it's normal I'm here."
"Yes, it is, but Miky called to say you weren't coming, that your blindness returned. In fact, I was going to check on you later." He said and she denied "I'm fine, stop worrying too, Eric. I better go to work; I don't want to waste any more time. And stop worrying, I'm fine." Jess responded a little more abruptly than normal "You know you don't need to work. You better take the day off."
"I already took it yesterday, so no, I'm not going to take the day off." Jess reported and the man ended up raising his hands in the air "Okay, whatever you want." He said and Jessica went who knows where. The gentleman shook his head. Apparently knew Jessica well and knew how stubborn she could be, although I remember she wasn't that stubborn before. I was so deep in my thoughts that I didn't realize the man had been standing there looking at me.
"Are you offered something small?" He asked after a few minutes looking in the direction Jess had gone. "What?" I asked, focusing my gaze on him. "Can I offer you anything?" He asked again "Eh... Well, a coffee would be nice." I responded, "I'll bring it to you now. Were you coming with Jessica?" He asked and I nodded. "I've never seen you with her." He noted, "I arrived in Los Angeles a couple of days ago and I ran into her yesterday."
"It's rare she just met a person and trust them so much." He said "We really have known each other for years." I admitted "How much time?" he asked, now a little confused I would say "I know her from Italy" I said "I already said that slight accent and that she did things when I told her in Italian had something to do with it."
"Are you Italian?" I asked, surprised. "Yes, I've been here for ten years." He answered, "And do you know what's happening to Jessica?" I asked, trying to see if I could find out anything more about what was happening to Jessica. "What do you mean?" He questioned, raising an eyebrow. "Apparently you know about the blindness."
"Ah, that. Yes, she has a tumour, one of those that doesn't kill you. I discovered it myself when Miky's mother brought her to my office years ago." "What?" I whispered, all the air I had in my lungs escaping out of my body. "Yes, hasn't she told you?"
"No... I... I just found out." I said, stunned, "Well, she has it, I proposed to do her surgery myself, but as soon as I said what the surgery would cost, she refused. Furthermore, she had that tumour before they found her on the street."
I couldn't believe anything he's telling me right now. Did Jessica have a tumour before they found her? Since when did she has it? Would she have it before you came here four years ago? "Hey, are you okay? You turned pale suddenly." He said, coming closer to me "Yeah, just… just shocking. I didn't have the slightest idea..."
"It's normal you didn't know. I found out myself when we did the studies when Miky's mother brought her. The first time we missed that detail. Also, Jessica is a closed girl. She doesn't go around telling her things so nobody doesn't see her weak, I guess." He responded, shrugging his shoulders. "And they didn't do her surgery?" I asked worried "No... they don't have enough money for her surgery, and she prefers Miky to be well before herself."
"I could help you with that." I quickly said, "She's not going to accept it. I myself offered her the same and she refused. It sucks that here in the States, you have to pay for healthcare, that's why I ended up leaving it." He responded, denying "That would be solved if she returned to Italy."
"The issue is probably convincing her to fly there." He said, "I will find a way to convince her, but this can't go on like this." I assured "I really hope you make it." He admitted.
We were silent for a while, with what the man had just told me going through my head and remembering if he had been blind before he came here or any other symptom that could give me a clue, but nothing came to mind. "You know? That girl reminds me of an artist who died years ago. She was also Italian."
"Jessica Leone?" I asked with a small smile on my face "That one, she was a great artist. It's a shame she died." He responded, shrugging his shoulders. "That's what I thought." I admitted "Were you a fan of hers?" He asked curiously. "Obviously, but luckily for me, I was fortunate enough to be her boyfriend." I said, now with a big smile on my face "Did you know Jessica Leone?"
"Yes, I know her." I responded, "She seemed like a good girl." He said "And she still is." I assured, because if there's one thing that was more than clear, it's that Jess was still a good girl. "But she…" he started, but soon stopped saying whatever he was going to say. "That's what all of us thought until yesterday morning." I admitted "Non capisco nulla. (I don't understand anything)" he said "The girl who reminds you of her is Jessica Leone."
"I can't believe it... Are you sure?" He asked and I nodded "Completely." I assured, "Can you sit at that table and tell me how that girl is a waitress at my place?" he asked.
I smiled at the man and sat at the table he indicated to me. I'm glad to know someone who likes Jessica's art, because she really was good, and I don't think about it just because I love her like I do, but because it's true. If not, I highly doubt they would want to exhibit her art in many of the galleries that offered it. I'm also thinking about it the whole time and I don't know exactly how much time passed, but what I do know is that suddenly I have a glass of coffee in front of me and Jessica ends up sitting in front of me.
"You should not be working?" I asked with a small smile on my face. "And I am, but I want to apologize." She said "To me? Why?" I asked "Because of how I spoke to you earlier." Jess responded, "That's why you shouldn't apologize." I assured, "Of course it's necessary, you weren't to blame for what happened to me, it's just I get in a bad mood, that's all."
"I can understand, but can I ask you a question?" I asked "You shouldn't have known that, just pretend you don't know." she asked, with a sigh at the end "But I know, that's the problem. "I can help you Jessica…" I said softly "I'm not going to accept your help; I'm not going to die from this."
"It may not be, but all the problems that come with you can disappear." I responded and she denied, "I don't have enough money to pay for the surgery." She answered, looking away, "Yes, yes you do." I confessed, "My salary as a waitress is not enough to pay for the surgery, I assure you." She said laughing, but it wasn't a real one "You may not have it, but…" I started "But what?
"Before I tell you, will you keep an open mind and not take me for crazy?" I asked and Jessica rolled her eyes. "I'm not understanding anything, Santi." my former girlfriend said "Promise me Jess." I asked, "Okay, I'll keep my mind open." He answered and I looked towards the exit of the cafe "Can we go? "I prefer to tell you in a more private place." I said, "My shift doesn't end for another hour."
"But you can go with him." The man said, appearing out of nowhere next to us. "Eric, there's…" Jess began to protest. "Don't worry, I'll only pay you for the time you were working here." He said raising his hands and laughing, as if this was a discussion they often had. "You said that same thing last time."
"But this time it will be serious. Also, what I have to tell you may be important." He insisted, looking at me for a moment, "Okay... But if you pay me more, I'll give it back to you, if necessary, I'll leave it on the bar for you." Jess said, pointing at it with her finger, "You never keep that extra money I give you anyway."
"You really don't care?" Ahe asked again, "Of course not, come on, go, but first you have to do me a favour." the man asked, "Whatever you want." Jess responded quickly, "Don't think too much about what's going on with this guy, just follow your heart." He asked "What are you talking about Eric?" Jess asked, frowning. "You'll understand when the time comes. Just listen to me."
The face Jessica had at this moment was that she didn't understand anything, and I understand her, because if I were in the same situation as her, I wouldn't know anything about what the man was referring to, but in part I was grateful for his help. We left the cafeteria and started walking towards I don't know where, I just hope I don't get lost in the city, because it's the least convenient for me, especially considering tonight I have to be at Carla concert, which I didn't have to go to, but at least I'm going to work on this gig, the last one in which I would help Carla.