I was walking through the garden, exposing my face to the sun.
It was one of those nice, hassle-free days, and Mr. Jee was strolling beside me.
The last few days have passed quickly and at the same time sluggishly. I had only a minimum of lectures and courses at university, so I spent most of my time in an apartment, with canvas, paints, Sphinxie and tv series. The opening was just around the corner so I didn't have much time left.
,,I appreciate that you kept your promise." He spoke after a quite long time.
I smiled while I still suppressing the urge to ask about his daughter. He seldom mentioned her, but there was still the pain of separation.
As a personality he was really conscientious and courteous but too obstinate.
We continued sauntering in silence. I just wanted him to enjoy the fresh air carefree and so he took a break from his thoughts, which are the only ones that keep him company almost every day.
I didn't know his story and I doubt he'll ever let me know it. Therefor, I may also have been afraid to have conversations with him so as not touch a sensitive spot.
Little later, I felt a raindrop landed on my forehead. Shortly after that it completely flooded.
Mr. Jee strode back to the entrance but there was no hurry.
He didn't mind he would be wet or that he could catch a cold. The rain was like an experience for him and I didn't wanna ruin his moment.
Instead, I followed him slowly, watching the other people hide in the dryness.
But as soon as I spot a male figure that literally caught my eye on itself, I frowned.
I guessed that his rapid steps were directed at the smaller greenhouse, which was used in some therapies and healing processes.
Su-Jin was like a momentary scatter. He has appeared in my life and then disappeared again. Unexpected, unforced, unplanned.
He appeared, completely engulfed me, and then spat me back to the real world. I couldn't stand it.
I snapped out of my thoughts and realized that I hadn't walked for some time, instead I stood still, my hair soaked and in clothes from which water flowed.
I looked above me, at the sky, which was covered by masses of gray clouds.
When the thunder sounded, I ran to the building that Mr. Jee had just entered.
,,Thank you for the walk, my dear." A satisfied expression settled on his face.
Before I could answer anything, he turned and walked serenely to the elevators.
I touched the nose bridge with my fingers and closed my eyes. I wasn't sure about my next action, which I was going to do ...
Nevertheless, I went to one of the shelves at the supply corner and took two blankets from there.
Within a few minutes I was standing in front of the entrance again, under the roof, breathing deeply in the fresh, fragrant air that the rain brought with it.
I held one of the blankets over my head and ran it to my favourite place in this complex.
After my little sprint I entered a smaller snug greenhouse so I could smell all those strong scents.
The aroma of many kinds of flowers mixed with the fresh rain was just ineffable.
There was a loud sound of raindrops falling on the glass all around.
,,You came."
I saw him sitting on a wooden bench with a rough little journal in one hand and a black pen in the other.
,,Here." I took a few steps towards him and handed him the blanket that wasn't thrown over me.
Then I walked over to the raised edge right next to one of the glass panels and I sat there.
For a few minutes, when only nature could be heard instead of words, I caught Su-Jin hiding his face several times in the sleeve of his sweatshirt and coughing softly.
,,You're not well. Why then did you come here?" I finally posed a question.
,,I just wanted to see you." He replied with a thoughtful look, devoting only to the pages in his lap. I didn't recognise if it was an answer, a statement, sarcasm, or whatever, so I decided to just nod my head.
,,How is Ma-Ri?" I continued as I leaned my back against the huge flowerpot next to me.
He turned his face in my direction, but didn't even glance at me.
But I did. His pale face, tired and glassy eyes... it all meant the just-beginning flu. And yet he was still here.
,,I would like to know that too." He nervously fixed his beanie, which made me have the chance to notice a several metal rings on his fingers.
,,You know, you're the first person to ask about my sister and have a real interest in her."
There was no certainty that his words were meant to be literal. It could also be a kind of metaphor.
,,Just courtesy." That was my very poor attempt to make light of the situation.
I tilted my head, which also touched the surface of the flowerpot as I heard his chuckle followed by another cough.
Despite his words, however, I believed that Ma-Ri was not in the slightest peril now.
Then we stayed in our thoughts for a while. But a little later I found that in these thoughts he had returned to the moment I hoped to get rid of. Because of what he was going to say.
,,Those bruises are still visible ..." his gaze was fixed on my neck.
Unconsciously I ran my palms over either side of my neck as soon as his voice echoed in my ears.
Then I immediately took a pencil between my fingers, which was tangled in my hair to hold it in a simple bun. When I pulled it out, my hair fell over my shoulders and I adjusted it so that it flowed on both sides and thus covered what I was ashamed of.
My reaction was down to I couldn't overcome the fact that I didn't block the man from touching me.
,,Yeah, you know ... his grip was really ...tight." I flipped the pencil between my fingers. At the same time, I displaced the memory that was trying to come to my mind again.
The sound of rain seemed to grow stronger and I drew my blanket closer to me.
My gaze was still focused on the pencil in my hand and then I was caught afraid of his reaction. Maybe that's why I raised my head to let out another thoughtless thing.
,,In your hands, can it be called a diary?" I pointed my head in the direction where he was holding it.
It was a mortifying attempt, yes, but it still served its purpose. On the other hand, I meant the question. I was really interested and also wondering if he really preferred paper and pen for his feelings.
He suddenly got up from the bench, walked straight to me, and sat down in the same place, opposite me. Then he reached his hand so I could take the journal from him. ,,See for yourself."
When I had it in front of me, I flipped through it so I could do as he said.
I read every word and absorbed every single emotion that flowed through those letters.
But as I was going through random pages and concentrating on all those letters, scratches and sheet music that were written there ... it seemed too personal to me. Too precious.
And then I closed it abruptly.
A moment later I examined the cover of that bundle of chaotic feelings until his voice had to interrupt me.
,,Frankly, I did expect you to do that. Closing it and maybe slamming it against my forehead because you simply don't stock up on other people's angsts and stuff, that's what I added in my assumption."
Several hours of meetings. It took him exactly that long to read me all over.
I didn't want to be so easy to map.
With a hint of uncertainty, I looked into his face and tried to read his reaction.
On the face of it, it looked as if he was breathing a sigh of relief – the way his body relaxed.
But then he froze as he coughed again.
I leaned over him thoughtlessly and placed my palm on his forehead.
What I felt was definitely not good.
,,You better go home, Su-Jin." I watched as he rested his head wearily with his eyes closed on the glass next to him.
,,Will you take me there?" came from his barely open lips.
,,I don't even buy water in plastic bottles. You think I have a car?" I stood up and threw my blanket over him as well when I saw him shiver from the cold this time.
,,I have."