Chereads / The Modern family and Me / Chapter 24 - 24•My funky valentine[3]

Chapter 24 - 24•My funky valentine[3]

While that was going on, we momentarily take our view back to Jay and Gloria Date as the crowd laughter was dying down when Brenner started to speak again

Brenner:"In Oregon,the state legislature ratified a, uh, bill...that from now on it is a crime...to have sex in Oregon with a farm animal.How ugly are the women in Oregon?"

Laughter and Applause was heard as Gloria threw her head back while patting Jay arm

Gloria:"He's funny, Jay."

Jay:"I know. See?"

Brenner:"I can tell you're not-you're not from Oregon."

Gloria:"No."

Brenner:"You are gorgeous."

Gloria:"Thank you."

Brenner:"Thank you for bringing your father to the show."

Jay:"Oh, no. I'm her husband, Dave."

Brenner:"No kidding."

Jay nodded as Merlyn and Lucy noticed Jay and Gloria.

Brenner:"What's it like to be married to someone who was there when the Bible was written?What was it called then? Just "The Testament"?"

Jay:"That's, uh- That's-That's good stuff."

Jay was awkwardly chuckling as the surrounding people were laughing and clapping along. He started to clap to as a way to show that he didn't feel offended but the comedian had to be a comedian

Brenner:"Oh, now he's trying to turn out the light."

Now back to our scene with Manny. We have one of the waiters tell the Durkas boy that he got a phone call as he took the bait and got up to the phone that was on the other side of restaurant, but luckily, it was just Cameron distracting him so nothing major.

Durkas:"Hello?"

Cameron:"Uh, yes. Hello.Mr. Durkas?"

Durkas:"Yeah."

Cameron was using his southern accent to hide his identity, which was weird for Will who was looking at him due to the Durkas kid is probably never going to remember his voice, certainly not a stranger.

But Will shook his head as a set of fries landed on the table with Will picking some up and dipping them in ketchup and feeding Alex.

She momentarily denied it but Will didn't give up as Alex blushed and opened her mouth as Will fed her the long fry that was dripping with ketchup

(AN:AY YO AUTHOR THEY ONLY 13!!!!)

Alex:"Thanks…"

Will:"You cute when you eat because your cheeks puff up like a chipmunk"

Alex hid her face away as Will only apologized but then rubbing his chin, Alex got curious

Alex:"What?"

Will:"I don't know. I think we should give each other nicknames. I'm deciding on chipmunk or gorgeous…"

Alex thought about that and he was right, they occasionally called each other pleasing names but never one that matched them, but this conversation will continue once this is all over and they can enjoy it without interruptions

Cameron:"This is Don Jolly...with the Great Shakes corporate office,and I have good news for you.You have been selected to take part in a random survey...that you could win cash and prizes.Does that sound like…something you'd be interested in"

He was taking breaks due to him sneaking in fry's during the phone call. Mitchell just shook his head and letting out a sharp breath

Durkas:"Yeah, sure."

Cameron:"Okay, just a few simple questions for you.Would you please rank your favorite ice creams

at Great Shakes...from least favorite to favorite?"

Durkas:"I don't know 'em by heart."

Cameron:"There should be a menu right there to your right.To your right.Mm-hmm. There you go."

Luckily for them, Durkas wasn't the brightest like Luke, so the boy didn't ask questions on how they knew the menu was to the right of him. Now seeing Durkas distracted, Manny got the green light to win his valentine back.

Standing in front of her table, the girl was surprised on why Manny was here

Fiona:"Oh. Hi, Manny"

Manny:"oh hey, Fiona. Can I join you?"

Fiona:"I guess so?"

She shrugged as Durkas was still occupied

Durkas:"Chocolate."

Cameron:"Uh-huh. Go on."

Durkas:"Vanilla."

Cameron:"I'm taking copious notes.Keep goin', Mr. Durkas."

With Cameron taking Durkas time, it left Manny to explain the whole thing to Fiona

Fiona:"So, why would Ted say he wrote the poem if he didn't?"

Manny:"Maybe because you're the cutest girl in school,and you have a laugh that makes science lab seem like recess."

Fiona blushed and smiled as she looked down while Manny smiled. Alex and Will looked over as they both nodded.

Cameron:"Would you be more or less inclined to visit a Great Shakes establishment...if you knew your satisfaction was guaranteed?"

Durkas:"That's a dumb question."

Cameron:"Excuse me. It is not a dumb question, Mr.-Tarnation! He hung up."

Mitchell:"Then you can drop the accent."

Shutting his phone quickly, they all turned to look at Durkas walking up to his table and standing at the side of it as Manny was sitting in front of Fiona

Durkas:"Delgado. What are you doing here?"

Manny:"Discussing poetry.Maybe you'll like to recite some of yours.?"

Durkas:"I'm not gonna recite anything."

Many:"Just admit you didn't write the poem."

Durkas:"I don't know what he's talking about. Get out of here before you get your butt kicked."

Will:"I'm going over there"

Cameron:"I'm going over there"

They both said the same exact the thing as they started to get up but Mitchell held back Cameron as Alex just put her hands in front of Will

Alex:"Are you crazy? You are not going to beat up a middle schooler."

Will:"If it comes down to helping manny then I don't mind."

Alex:"What if you overestimate him?"

Will:"Please have you seen me?"

Alex blushed remembering that one time when Will asked her out, seeing his tone muscles and how Will would be in first place in all of the physical activity's in gym period

Mitchell:"That's not needed, I'm going over there…this is my new, redemption case"

Exhaling out and mumbling the last part, Mitchell stood up and started to button up his shirt as he walked towards them. He arrived when Manny was getting out of the seat when Durkas pushed him

Mitchell:"Whoa! Whoa, sir! Sir? Turn around.Sir,you have no right to claim ownership of another person's work."

Durkas:"Who are you?"

Mitchell:"I'm a lawyer."

Durkas:"You have a lawyer?"

Mitchell:"It is one thing to lie,but then to bully this young man-it's unforgivable.And this is what's wrong with the world today.The big guy...thinks that he can roll right over the little guy...until the little guy says,"Enough."And that's what this little guy's doing-right here, right now."

Manny:"Can we stop calling me "little guy"? I'm in the 40th percentile."

Whispering that to Mitchell, He was only told to trust him as Mitchel continued his verdict as everyone was looking at them

Mitchell:"Ted Durkas clearly did not write that poem.I know it. He knows it.Deep down in your heart, Fiona-You know it too…Shame!"

Cameron was already standing up with Lily as Mitchell pointed to the kid. Will and Alex held in their laughs.

Durkas:"Fine! Whatever. I stole his stupid poem."

Fiona:"You did?"

Many:"I told you."

Mitchell:"There you go."

Durkas:"I only did it because I had the feelings,I just didn't know how to show 'em."

Fiona:"Really? That's the sweetest thing anyone's ever done for me."

Manny:"You've gotta be kidding me.Let's get out of here. This chick's crazy."

Mitchell:"Seriously."

Obviously things didn't go as planned as they had hopped or How Will didn't get a chance to help Manny out due to Mitchell taking over

Cameron:"I've never seen you like that."

Mitchell:"You have no idea how good that felt."

Cameron:"Happy Valentine's Day consular"

And after that was whole neatly, or so, wrapped up they got out of there but Will already called for his car and his butler as he decided to stay there a bit more with Alex on the condition that Mitchell was there but at another table to not ruin their date.

But that wraps things up there as we have our scene back to the Jay sitting there and taking the shots the comedian was throwing at him.

Brenner:"And you don't have to worry about him cheating.That's for sure.Because if he does, you'll catch him...when he comes home with two sets of teeth in his mouth."

Jay:"Yeah."

Brenner:"So tell me,on the wedding night,what-what did he do? Did he say he wanted to change into something comfortable and go into a coma?"

The crow laughed once again as Jay scratched his head when Gloria laughed along and stroked his arm

Jay:"Listen, I gotta use the men's room."

Gloria:"Nuh-uh."

Jay:"I gotta use the men's room. I'll be right back."

Brenner:"Where you going? Wait a minute. I'm only joking. That's what I do.You know,you're way younger than I am.You just don't look it."

Jay already left as Merlyn and Lucy looked at each other as they saw Gloria getting up and following after him. They decided that Checking up him was the right thing to do since if it was anyone else, Brenner might've already been shouted and heckled at

Gloria:"Ah, Jay, papi, don't pay attention to what he's saying.He's just being funny."

Jay:"Because he points out the truth.Those people were laughing because they saw it too."

Gloria:"What do you care what they think?"

Jay:"I don't.I care what you think."

Gloria:"I love you.You're my valentine."

Jay:"Yeah, for now.But what about when I'm 80

and I'm in a wheelchair, on oxygen? You still gonna want me?"

They were discussing in the hallway as Gloria held her purse and her long black coat in her hands

Gloria:"Do you think I'm so shallow that I'm gonna leave you when you're old?What if I gain a hundred pounds? You gonna leave me then?"

Jay:"…No."

Gloria:"What's with the pause?"

Jay:"Well, it's not exactly fair. I mean, I have to get old.You don't have to get fat."

Gloria:"If I want to get fat, I get fat."

Jay:"Okay, fine. And if you do, I'll be there. You'll see."

Gloria:"Yeah, watch me.Watch me, how I get fat.I can get fat."

Gloria:"And I'll be there."

Gloria had a tint of red on her cheeks as she laughs with Jay giving her a kiss on her cheek.

Gloria:"Good.You wanna go back in?"

Jay:"No."

Jay:"I got a better idea.Let's go salsa dancing. This guy's not that funny."

She gasped and nodded as Merlyn and Lucy just caught up to them as Lucy was holding her hand held purse with a necklace of pearls.

(AN:Uh oh, this reminds me of…Mr.Wayne….")

Merlyn:"Jay!, you alright man?"

Jay:"Merlyn! Surprised to see you here. eh, it's nothing. Gonna take something more than that to get my confidence down"

Lucy:"Hope we're not interrupting anything"

Gloria:"It's fine, we just went over of how much we meant to each other"

They chuckled as they walked off with them talking as well as Gloria and Lucy discussing amongst themself.

While that was going on, Claire-Juliana, just came out of the bathroom with her long white coat on as she stopped in front of Clive and smiled .

Juliana:"Clive, I have a little something for you."

Clive:"What is it?"

Juliana:"My dress."

Clive:"Oh, th-"

Juliana:"My bra."

Clive:"Oh, my G-"

Juliana:"My underwear."

Clive:"My God."

Clive was assaulted with Juliana clothing as he put them in his coat pocket with a grin that himself and Juliana had on their faces

Juliana:"Yeah.What do you say we take this upstairs?"

Clive:"This is so much better than cheesy garlic bread."

Heading out of the bar, they were on the first floor as they headed for the escalator with Clive having the biggest grin.

Clive:"This is all happening so fast, Juliana."

Juliana:"I know, and I have to be home to my husband by midnight."

Clive got "surprised" as they were heading up and kissed each other which sent Juliana backward a bit, but unfortunately for Juliana, she didn't buckle her coat as one of the end of the belts got caught up in one of moving stairs, which got her to break character

Claire:"Phil! Phil, my coat is stuck."

Clive:"Who's Phil?"

Claire:"No, not now!Seriously.My coat is stuck."

Phil:"Oh, oh.Honey, take off your coat!"

Claire:"Are you kidding me? Pull it."

Phil:"Oh, my goodness."

Claire:"Pull it.Come on. Come on.Oh, boy. Not good. Not good."

She was panicking but Phil surprisingly was quick on his feet as he dived to press the red button to the stop the escalator from moving, causing everyone behind them to walk and see what was happening

Claire:"Okay. Okay. Okay"

Phil:"Come on up. Treat 'em like they're regular stairs.It's okay.Come on through.Happy Valentine's Day.You look lovely.So do you.Not in a weird way."

Strangers, luckily, we're passing through as Claire stood still and tried to pull it as a client of Phil appeared here, which was really a bad time

Tom:"Phil?"

Phil:"Hey, Tom."

Claire:"Hi."

Phil:"How are you? Honey-Claire,you remember Tom Mickleson from the office and his wife, Susan."

Claire:"I do. Hey"

Tom:"Is your coat stuck?"

Claire:"It is. It really is.It's in there pretty darn good."

Tom:"Why don't you take it off?"

Claire:"Um, I'm freezing cold."

Tom:"At least let me give it a shot."

Phil:"Oh, I don't think-"

Tom:"No, no, no. I got it."

Tom like a human being, offered his hep as he got down on his knee and pulled on the belt that was jammed in there

Balaban:"Mr. And Mrs. Dunphy?"

Claire:"Hey, Principle Balaban.Hey,how are you?"

Balaban:"Who's Clive Bixby?"

Shaking Phil hand, Balaban pointed out why he had a name tag of different person

Phil:"Oh, uh, he makes speeches .He's actually in town for a trade show.-"

Claire:"Phil."

Balaban:"My, are you stuck?"

Claire:"Yeah, I am.A little bit."

Balaban:"Why don't you take off that coat?"

Claire:"Um, I'm chilly."

Tom:"It's really jammed in here."

Balaban:"Let me in there.I'll get you."

Phil:"No, I think we're okay."

Now joining in to help Claire unjam her coat, Claire stood there as Phil was watching the two men help her Wife, unclog her coat that was stuck in the escalator, luckily the coat went down to her legs so a breeze or anything couldn't look under or blow it upward.

And like any embrassing moment in your life, some people or more that you know have to be there

Passwater:"Mrs. Dunphy?"

Claire:"Are you kidding me?!,Hi! Luke's math teacher,Ms. Passwater."

Phil:"Passwater."

He was smacked by Claire as he stopped chuckling. He went off somewhere with his cellphone and came back only 5 minutes later as he reassured everyone with his acting

Phil:"We're good! We're good! I talked to Maintenance.They're- They're-They're coming, so go on ahead.See you guys.See you later.See you in school.Good to see you guys.Maintenance is gonna

take care of it."

Claire was still stuck as everyone said goodbyes and her breathing out in relief when Phil stood next to her

Phil:"So we're fine.Bye!"

Claire:"Okay. Okay, how long till they get here?"

Phil:"I was faking it.No one's coming for us."

Claire:"Well, then, go and get them!Hurry!That was the most embarrassing moment of my life."

Jay:"Claire! Phil!"

Lucy:"Hi Claire"

Merlyn:"Hey Phil"

Claire:"Stand by."

Phil and Claire were surprised seeing them here as they chuckled nervously

Phil:"Hey.Mr.Zoloman?"

Merlyn:"I bumped into Jay here, how's it going?"

Phil:"Great. Fantastic"

Lucy:"Hey Claire, everything alright?"

Jay:"What, did you get your belt stuck?"

Claire:"I did. Yeah."

Jay:"Take your coat off.Here, let me help you."

Claire:"No, no, Dad.Dad, I'm fine."

Jay:"Come on!What are you naked under there?"

Claire had a sheepish smile as Jay threw his head back while Merlyn looked between Phil and Claire. Lucy and Gloria only smiled.

Jay:"Aw, geez."

Gloria:"It's okay.I got this."

Lucy:"You to?"

Gloria:"Yes, and you?"

Lucy:"Same, where was yours?"

They both had small smiles as they headed forward to Claire as Gloria helped her put on the black coat that she brought, while Lucy stood to the side of her and help her cover up any showing skin

Phil:"Okay."

Phil was beside the 2 men as he looked lost and amazed seeing them

Gloria:"Claire,follow my lead, okay?"

Claire:"Okay."

Lucy:"Don't worry your in good hands"

Claire:"Wow. Okay.Thank you."

Successfully changing clothing without anyone seeing her naked, Claire thanked them both as they both just giggled and just waved it off.

Lucy:"We should really get coffee and talk about this one time"

Gloria:"We should"

Claire:"Oh I hope not..."

Phil:"That was impressive."

Jay:"Take it down a notch,Clive."

Merlyn:"Why do you have name tag?"

Phil:"Uh, because-You good?"

Claire:"Yeah. I'm good."

Evading Merlyn question, Phil just smiled

Phil:"All right."

Claire:"I'm good.Happy Valentine's Day."

Phil:"Happy Valentine's Day."

Gloria:"Chao."

Phil:"Okay. See ya."

Merlyn:"Bye Jay"

Lucy:"Good night.Gloria, looks like we're coming with you to pick up Will"

Jay and Gloria headed a different way as Merlyn and Lucy accompanied Claire and Phil who awkwardly chuckled

Phil:"Oh. That's-"

Claire:"About that…."

While they were talking, Claire undergarments that she gave Phil slipped out of cost pocket and landed on the ground as they both quickly picked up while chuckling awkwardly.

Lucy:"Black…black is for…special occasions"

Claire:"Uh,yeah,um,"

Lucy:"It's none of my business, have fun Claire and I'll pick up Will on the way"

Lucy gave her a small smile as Claire nodded when they saw their backs as they walked away but then they stopped and turned around as they came back again

Lucy:"Uh sorry but, where are they?"

Claire:"Oh right!Sorry."

After texting her the address of Cameron place, they exchanged goodbyes and went off in different directions

Phil:"See you, guys."

And like that, they arrived at Cam place to see Alex and will sleeping on the couch. They exchanged some light introductions as Alex and Will position was like this, they were sitting on the couch with their eyes closed while leaning on each other as they had a nice blanket over them.

Lucy "aw" as Merlyn pointed to the girl in which Lucy nodded, indicating that is Alex. They said goodbye to Cameron and Mitchell as they headed for their house

Like that, Valentine ended with Alex enjoying a day where she finally is a part of as she had a smile on her face when she was in her bed, as well as Will.