Jay and Will rematch was going as they kept shouting out words to try and distract the other one as Jay could see he wasn't getting anywhere.
Jay:"Pretty good for a kid-BREAK"
Will:"Pretty agile for a…more mature man"
Jay:"You were gonna say old weren't you?"
Will:"Whaaattt?"
Realizing he was distracted, Jay used all his might to swing at the ball so that when it came back, it was faster and that was when he decided to play his card.
Jay:"I'm telling Alex you called her grandpa old"
Will:"Wha-"
Jay:"YES! Hahaha, like I said, I was distracted at first"
Will was about to hit it back but after he said that, he lost focus and slipped up as the ball dropped down with Jay smiling while Cameron just shook his head as he came in.
Jay:"Alright no need to feel bad, you just need a couple more of practice and you'll be able to beat me"
Cameron:"I can not believe how low you got"
Jay:"Low? Hey, it's all fair game. And wasn't he about to call me old in the first place?"
Cameron:"You are"
Jay:"Hey, I'm not old, im middle. Not young or to old, but just perfect"
He chuckled as he started to exit out of the room.
Jay:"You guys gonna mope there or are you guys gonna shower that embarrassing defeat?"
Leaving while laughing, They both shook their heads as they turned to look at each other
Will:"Is he always like this?"
Cameron:"Can't say, this was the first time we actually went out together for something."
Will:"Well, if he's like this when playing with someone, then I see why he only plays golf by himself"
Cameron:"Oh burn, should've said that when he was here"
Exiting out of the room while talking and laughing, Will shook his head
Will:"I don't wanna get on his bad side knowing he might be there at the wedding"
Cameron:"Wedding? What wedding?"
Will:"I said to much"
Cameron:"You weren't thinking of marrying Alex would you?"
Will:"How'd you know?"
Cameron:"Please, I might be gay but I know all about love"
Will:"So…to soon?"
Cameron:"I don't know, it's different for everyone but I would wait until your both adults"
Will:"Duh, I'm not in a rush to marry"
Cameron:"So…-"
Will:"Drop it Cam, im not having another rematch"
Cameron:"I didn't even say that yet"
Will:"But were you?"
Cameron:"Yeah…"
They arrived at the locker room as Jay was already putting his equipment away while also preparing to wash off. Cameron found a sauna as he and Will wanted to try it out as they wanted to experience it.
Because a shower and a bath was all you needed, a sauna was just something for fun as Will didn't see the point in staying in a hot room for minutes or hours. He didn't want to get a heat stroke due to him not knowing how much he could take before passing out.
Anyways, While they were in that, Jay took a couple more minutes as he finished putting his equipment in his duffle bag and started to undress.He was facing the lockers as he had his shirt and boxers on.
Jay:"I told you I'd win."
He heard Shower Running as he must've guest it was Cameron due to Will reminding him during the match, that he wanted to try the sauna
Jay:"Not talking so much now, are you, hotshot?Hope you enjoy that nice, hot shower, but it's not gonna wash away the shame of that 15-7 beatdown."
After hearing the running water off, Jay just chuckled
Jay:"While your heading to the sauna, tell Will that there's no shame losing to a more experienced player. Haha, You should have seen the look on your face...when that drop shot just kissed the wall."
Unfortunately, Jay suspicion of thinking it was Cameron was wrong as it was actually a tall bald man, that just finished showering when he sat on the bench, opposite of Jay who was facing towards the lockers.
He was busy trash talking due to him still having his clothes on as he didn't turn around and that's when he started take off his shorts when not getting a response but a splashdown occurred. Jay only shook his head as he chuckled
Jay:"Ah. Okay, splashdown.Got me again.Yep.Make the uptight straight guy all embarrassed.Except for one thing-Doesn't even bother me anymore.I could do this all day. Here, another one for you.Maybe a couple of 'em."
He proceeded to bump his butt on the strangers back but Jay didn't know that as he was still chuckling but that's when Cameron came around the corner with his robe on showing his hairy chest while having his hair wet, catching Jay shorts down with his butt out.
Cameron:"Jay,Me and Will just found the sauna.How big of a hurry are we in?"
His smile went into an 'O' as he stopped and lifted his shorts in a hurry as he grabbed his duffle bag and started to exit the awkward situation he was in
Jay:"Biggest hurry of your life. 'Scuse me. 'Scuse me."
Cameron entered with Jay behind him as he had an exhausted expression. Will saw this and laughed thinking he was exhausted due to the match
Will:"So has age finally caught up to your bones"
Jay:"Huh?Uh, Yeah…."
Jay didn't answer properly as he sat down on the wooden bench with his clothes still on and looking lost in thought as Will looked at Cameron with a questioning face
Cameron:"He had a splashdown with a stranger back"
Will nodded slowly as he looked at Jay who was looking out into the distance and mumbling something
Jay:"Splashdown….splashdown….Stranger…."
Cameron and Will saw this but shrugged as they started to relax while not worrying about Jay, thinking it will pass over.
While that was happening, we take our view back to the scene at the Dunphy house as Claire arrived at her house with her friend, Valerie.
They just parked outside as they got outside their cars with Claire coming beside her.
Claire:"Here it is."
Valerie:"It's really cute."
Claire:"Yeah.We're pretty proud of it.-"
Haley:"Here's your stupid CDs...and your clothes and your poems!"
Dylan:"Don't you do it!"
Haley:"Oh, I'm doing it."
As they were coming up to the house, they saw Haley throwing the stuff of Dylan outside her window which landed in front of the house with Dylan picking up
Claire:"Haley, stop it. What are you doing?"
Dylan:"Tearing out my heart"
Haley:"Oh, why don't you go get a hickey from Sharon Nicolini?"
Dylan:"It's from my guitar strap, Haley."
Haley:"Oh, thanks for reminding me."
Claire:"That's my daughter Haley-and her boyfriend Dylan."
She headed in the house with Valerie right after Dylan got hit by a suit case.
Valerie:"This is a nice color."
Claire:"Yeah.Um, listen.This is not normal,with all that, nor-nor is that liquor smell?Phil, honey? Oh, my God. Luke, what is that?"
Coming to the kitchen, she caught Luke almost fully naked with him only wearing underwear. He was also holding a bottle that could ruin a girl reputation, while Alex was swatting the floor with a broom
Luke:"Jägermeister. Dad says it makes girls easier to kiss."
Claire:"What happened to the rug?"
Luke:"I had an accident."
Claire:"Okay. Alex, what are you doing?"
Alex:"I'm trying to kill a rat."
Claire let out a humm as Alex passed by her with Valerie awkwardly chuckling.
Dylan:"Sharon was helping me buy you a birthday present.Don't you get it? I love your ass."
Valerie:"I- You know, I-I-I'm late and I should go."
Claire:"I know. I know. it seems like things have gotten a little wonky around here. I don't know where Phil is. He's definitely-"
Explaining for this huge mess while heading to the door, they screamed when they found the rat passing by them with Alex chasing it.
Claire:"Oh, my God. Alex-Where's your father?"
Alex:"He went outside to go to the bathroom."
Claire:"Uh-huh.It's... not usually like this. Oh, gross."
Haley and Dylan were making up in the staircase when she jumped up and wrapped her legs around him
Dylan:"Let's just get married."
Haley:"Okay"
Resuming their kiss, Claire looked at Valerie who just laughed it off and left with Claire walking and talking behind her. Phil just finished his long over due conversation when he called out for her
Phil:"Claire! Claire! Hey."
Claire:"Phil, what are you-What are you doing?"
Phil:"Just concluding a little business.Very successfully, I might add."
Valerie scrunched up her nose as Claire somehow laughed in frustration by what he said in front of her friend.
Valerie:"Hi."
Phil:"Is that Valerie?"
Valerie:"Yeah."
Phil:"Wow! You look fantastic.Come here.Get over here.How long has it been?"
Valerie:"A long time."
Reluctantly going over to him, Valerie still had her smile as she was on the other side of Dylan car with Phil trying to shake her hand
Valerie:"Oh, I can't touch you. Okay."
Phil:"A little bit difficult. Gulf divides us,eh?So nice to see you."
Valerie:"It's great to see you though-Okay.All right."
Claire:"Okay, then.Thanks for coming by.It's such a pleasure."
Valerie:"Bye-bye.You have a beautiful family."
She left as Claire huffed out.
Phil:"She looks great,doesn't she?"
Claire:"What is on your face?"
Right after she left she questioned Phil on why. Phil had no response as he to, thought it was a bad idea when he has to take it off. Dylan was finally backing out the drive way with him grabbing his stuff and putting it in the trunk of his car as Claire was still outside, contemplating her decision on weather this was a good idea…of course it wasn't.
Phil existed out of the bathroom quietly as he made a break for it and entered the house with Claire following him
Claire:"One time! Once!One time I bring somebody home...who I want to impress,and what do I find?A bunch of booze-drenched hill people...just sitting around in their underwear and-and chasing rats... and fornicating in the stairwell!"
They were all gathered in the hall as Claire was angrily spouting out what Valerie thought of her family. They were all silent as they looked sorry, with Haley fixing her hair and shirt.
Phil:"Can I say something?"
Claire:"No. No, you can't,Mario.There is nothing left to say but thank you.Thank you all."
And with that, she left by loudly shutting the door, getting in her car and leaving. They all looked at each other and then finally at Phil as he took of his fake mustache with one swift move but he forgot that like a bandage, it hurts like hell.
Phil:"Ow!"
Haley and Alex rolled their eyes as Luke laughed. They spent some hours cleaning the Kitchen, more like Phil and Alex as Haley sat on the chair with Luke just putting the bottles back in their box.
Haley:"That was unreal. Mom was crazy."
Luke:"I'm scared."
Phil:"Look. I know your mom pretty well. She's fine. I'd be willing to bet she's just composing herself, taking a nice, long,peaceful walk in the park."
While that was going on, Will just came down from his room when Alex texted him that she had to go shower. When reaching down into the kitchen, he saw something unbelievable. His parents cooking!
Will:"Uh I don't want to spoil this mood but don't we have a maid?"
Lucy:"Oh please, that's what we say when you cook for us"
Will laughed it off as his dad just smiled
Merlyn:"Trying out a new hobby. Mind taste testing this?"
Will:"As long as I don't get food poisoning"
Merlyn:"Haha, very funny. Just try it"
Will tried the food his father, a person who would spend more time in his lab than his own family.
Unfortunately even some people had Limits as Will grabbed a piece of napkin and spit the food out.
Merlyn:"That bad huh?"
Will:"Insanely bad. Almost like that time I kicked your butt on the game"
Merlyn:"Okay let's get some things out of our chest, i let you win."
Will:"Sure dad"
Merlyn chuckled as he shook his head with Lucy just smiling seeing their interaction.
Merlyn:"Well why don't you teach me?"
Will:"Me?"
Merlyn:"What? Is it that bad to have help from my son?"
Will shook his head as they got ingredients out with them helping each other out and goofed off with Lucy secretly recording it.
When that was going on, Claire returned to her family and happily ate dinner with them even though she angrily ate fast food a little while ago but nothing beats eating with the ones you love.
And like that, the day came to end with Cameron happily laying in his bed with Mitchell when he finally played with Jay.
Jay happily laid in his bed with Gloria as he thought he knew he was better than Cam and Will.
Claire happily was in her home knowing she wouldn't trade her family for another one.
And Will, happily spending time with his father.
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An:NO DIRTY THINKING!!!
Next time on Modern family….
Claire was holding a basket of laundry as she got up the stairs and saw Haley having her ear pressed against her room.
Haley noticed her mom and made a gesture of being quiet as she too, brought her ear upon the door of the room.
Will:"Hold still its tight"
Alex:"Go all the way."
Will:"Do I have to? It's my first time"
Alex:"It's mine to but go all the way and hurry it hurts!"
Claire looked shocked and stumbled to speak as she didn't think twice and opened the door to see her daughter and Will —————
(AN:Was this joke to much??? Also next chapter is a filler but expect it be short like 1000 words or short. For reference the chapter you read has 2300 words)