"I-... I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked." Elena looked down at the floor with guilty eyes.
"Whatever. So, that's why I kicked you. I'd also prefer if you keep this information to yourself."
"That you can trust me with!" She looked up at me again. "I'd take this to grave with me."
"Hope so. Anyways..." I opened my dorm's door. "It's getting late."
"R-right!" She quickly left the room.
I locked the door again and laid on bed tired.
I hate it here. No matter how and where, my past keeps chasing after me. Maybe it's karma catching up to me. I wonder why things went the way they did. Was I wrong speaking about it to that relative? Maybe if had kept it all to myself, I would've had a better life. Thoughts like these became all too common yet I never found an answer. It was too complicated for me to think about. Elena and I are building a deeper bond whether I'd like to admit it or not. She is slowly becoming a burden to me yet I can't totally cut her off. How long would I keep pushing people away... Even back in my own world, I deeply craved human interaction and video games were the best way to interact with people while keeping your identity hidden. In online games, the only thing that mattered was that you both play this one very particular game. But now it's different. I can't keep hiding and keeping to myself. I have to take a step forward no matter how much I want to stay curled up in my bed.
I wonder if I can ever be cured. Maybe I'm too far-gone and beyond saving now.
...
I can't say I had a good night sleep but here I was in fight against Luke. Somehow we got matched instead because of some internal issues and he was going to win no matter what. Losing in semi-finals isn't that bad, right?
The match began with him charging at me. I parried the attack and was about to hit him when he turned around and blocked the attack. It's almost as if he anticipated it and was simply showing off. How he turned was so unnatural that it had to be preplanned.
I jumped back to create some gap between us but considering he knows how dirty I can play, he would pay a lot of attention to me. I can play into that by pretending that I'm going to play dirty but end up not doing anything. In his anticipation, he should create an opening and mess up.
We exchanged a few more blows before I tossed my sword to the side. This should definitely make him start questioning my plans. He would overcomplicate things and I would do something unbelievably simple. I would simply brute force my way through him.
"So, what could possibly be your plan?" He smirked before charging at me again.
I charged at him too and took a blow to my right arm which was definitely painful but that was the plan. Brute force. I grabbed his sword, which caught him off-guard, and kicked him right in the knee making him fall onto ground in pain.
"Plan was that there was no plan." I smiled at him.
"I see." He answered and grabbed the sword and stood up again. "Kick to knee isn't new for me." He said before everything went black.
...
"W-what?! What happened?" I looked around to see all my friends.
"You lost." Luke smirked. "A hit to your head is all it took to defeat you."
"Knew it. I lost but semi-finals should count towards a better grade."
"Seeing how you landed an attack on him is something. You don't have magic or experience like he does and yet you managed to fool him. Remarkable." Layla complimented me, I guess.
"It was interesting and would've worked if I wasn't significantly stronger than you. You kick actually didn't hurt. I was pretending to be hurt but I can't lie, it did catch me off-guard because of how stupid it was. You can't brute force your way against someone stronger than you." Luke sighed.
"At least it did catch you off-guard. A win is a win." I said.
"So, going to dominion of pride tomorrow?" Amelia asked and I nodded.
"I don't really have to attend academy till vacations which is next week anyways. I don't have any reason to watch finals or to attend result day. I want to see who this Furrina is and what her deal is. Kuaishwa said I might find the reason of my summoning in that dominion."
"I'll arrange a carriage for you then. Rest for now." Elena left the room afterwards.
...
I was on my way back home wondering about last night. Kara was not lying this time but I could definitely see why he would avoid answering about his life. He must've lived in fear and misery, right? Amelia might've picked up on cues but maybe I pushed him too much. She is the saint of this dominion so I think she is way more empathetic than I am.
Once I was home, I informed my parents that he lost in semi-finals.
"A man like him reaching semi-finals is interesting. He has potential, right?" Dad was pleased by the outcome.
"Anything else happened?" Mom asked and at first I was hesitant but I wanted to know. I told them a made up story to get their perspective on what he told me last night. I changed up genders to make it less obvious.
"A friend of yours is scared of men? I don't think there is ever a right answer to such questions. If she was trying to hide it, it can be good that she told you. Relying on one another is one way to heal. Your body can only take so much and once it reaches its limit, it tends act without thinking. I think you should spend a bit more time with her and not push her too much." Mom said.
"I think you should push her. To me, you can't better yourself if you don't try. Taking things at your own pace might hinder any real improvement you can make. World is not women and it is not men either. It's a combination of everyone and if you hide from men, you can't possibly become part of the world. I understand she has been hurt in the past but if we were to paint everyone based on one interaction then the world couldn't work. You both are friends with that Luke guy, right? Maybe create situations where the two are left alone. Maybe in public places so she would feel less scared. Luke is one gentleman. I think it would be a good start." Dad, who seemed to be more goal-oriented, said.
"Such a man-like opinion to have." Mom chuckled. For a while now, mom had been sick and if it wasn't for Kara, I wonder what would've happened to her.
But create situations where he can be alone with women in public spaces? He is already okay with that considering he was able to spend time with Amelia and Layla. He definitely has already made progress on his own but I think he can't progress into further stages.
He will be going to dominion of pride and meeting Furrina. I wonder how things may turn out there.
I might not have a chance with him if he goes there. I'm slowly reaching marriageable age too and I don't really want to marry into nobility. Kara just seems like a superior choice despite his troubles. Should I mention him to mom and dad... Whatever.
"Mom... Dad... I wanted to talk about marriage."
"O-oh?" Mom looked at me with surprise.
"Hm? You met someone?" Dad asked.
"Y'know Kara who helped mom. Him. He is an outlander and doesn't have magic but he is seen by her majesty in a favorable light. He also helped some nobles escape from Scofinia too. Also he is favored by Amelia and Lord Moh." I wanted to say as many positive things about him as possible. In nobility, marriages are transactional. His current situation isn't exactly that good but once he becomes the guardian of lady Ahankar, he will hold a position higher than the queen.
"That guy? I've heard that he had a lot of private meeting with her majesty. So the rumors are true. Why him? I know you don't care about all these achievements of his." Dad asked.
"He is just a safe option. I know who he is. He isn't a lord of any place but there are some secrets I know. You'd be pleased with him being my husband, I promise."
"Aw~ She is in love." Mom smiled at me. It was embarrassing but I just averted her eyes."I see. It's better than those nobles. But does he love you?" Dad asked. "I can totally see him being a rather important figure but apart from that, I can't let you be in a loveless marriage."
"Don't worry! I'll just confess and if he rejects then... well he rejects me, I guess." I answered.
"You've also matured recently. I wonder if you would've said that in the past but I think it's a good thing. I would suggest holding off any sort of proposal because I want to judge that man myself. Why not ask him to attend a dinner tonight?" Dad said.
With that the conversation ended and a carriage was sent to the academy to pick him up and drop him at the palace of Lady Furrina.
Tomorrow I'll confess to him and make sure I do it faster than Amelia.