Two days after visiting Jacob my mind is still a warzone of contradictions and doubts.
My emotions are a whole different battle field altogether.
I have been in constant pressure to both flee and stay beside River like the therapist advised.
One huge problem, I have scars to prove that I'm not as strong as they both think I am.
The fact that remembering my name on River's torso makes me nauseous keeps reminding me of how hypocritical I am.
Whenever I watch him smile at me when he catches me staring, my heart drops a few inches lower.
He doesn't know it's not concern that I'm conveying with my eyes but fear and guilt.
What if he finds out that I once spiraled down that road too?
He even thanked me that day outside Jacob's office.
And Jacob wouldn't shut up about how much River trusted me.
