Dreaming? My ass!
I'm finally at the point where I'm willing to accept that this is my reality now. Because I had been trying to convince myself that I was dreaming and that I'd wake up soon to my sad reality. But I have been trying to live this through for three days now, and I'm not waking up! Besides, what kind of dream runs 3-days long and plays as accurately as this?
Did I die and ascend to heaven? No, not likely. I don't think I was good enough. Or even if I was, why does heaven look exactly like my life on earth? Besides, these past few days, I still got scolded by my parents and my boss at work. Sure, my life in the past was way calmer than my present life, but shouldn't heaven be, I don't know, perfect?
Then, maybe, hell? I might fit there, but I was raised a Catholic, and they always say you would experience eternal suffering in hell. Honestly speaking, my condition here is not bad, which contradicts those beliefs.
So did I actually travel to the past? This theory was even harder to believe. Like, hello? Time travel? What am I, a grade schooler, who would think that was possible? Moreover, let's say scientists have already made time travel possible; even then, don't I need a time machine to be able to travel through time? And yet all I could remember was being attacked by someone whose face I can't even remember!
But it's been three days since I woke up on my 23rd birthday. And there were no signs that I'd ever return to the future, which was my real present. God! This is so confusing!
But what else can I do but let this life play out as it should? It's not like I can do anything to go back to my present. Besides, if I'm being honest with myself, I would admit that I like it here. I mean, sure, this life isn't perfect, but this isn't as miserable as my life in the distant future if I really did travel back in time.
My life here was… okay, I guess. I have a decent job which honestly does not pay well but was less stressful and allowed me to at least be able to do what I love to do in my free time, write.
Yes, I am an aspiring writer, as you would like to call it. I have been since I was in elementary. I love to tell stories but am too shy to share them out loud, so I gained the hobby of writing them instead. I even dreamt of being a famous author someday, but as you may remember, this never happened even until I reached thirty.
When I reached college, I was not allowed to pick my desired course because my parents could not support my studies. To be able to continue, I would have to be granted a scholarship. We were able to find a scholarship. However, it required picking a course related to computing. Hence, I was forced to take a Computer Science course instead of a course related to writing.
It was a miracle that an imbecile in mathematics like me was able to graduate from such a course. But since then, I have gotten jobs related to the industry. My first job was fine, with no tedious work, and I still got enough time to pursue my first love, writing novels. This was the job that I currently have on this timeline. The job I left for another that provides a higher salary but requires a lot more work. The very same job I was trying to endure in my actual present, or should I say in my distant future?
Now that I seem to have traveled back to my past, would I be able to change the course of my life? And should I?
I jumped when my mobile phone suddenly rang. I checked my phone just to be greeted by Kenji's name flashing on the screen.
"What?" I immediately said as soon as I answered the call. Relax, I'm not being rude. This is how we usually greet each other in person or via call.
"Don't what me. Where are you?" I could now imagine the frown on his face on the other side of the line.
"Home, why?" I calmly answered, not minding his tone.
"Do you know how much trouble I got myself into just to acquire those tickets for you?"
"Tickets?"
"Raiden's concert. It's today if you don't remember," He answered impatiently.
"What?" I said, dumbfounded. I rummaged through my drawer and found the envelope kept beneath all the stuff on it. I pulled out the ticket and gasped when I confirmed the event date that was neatly printed on it. It is today! I've been so busy thinking about my supposed death and how I traveled back in time that this detail completely slipped my mind.
"You sure you're okay? Should I bring you to a doctor?" he suddenly said, the concern now evident in his voice. "You've been acting strange these past few days."
"I'm fine; just a bit preoccupied," I answered. Try dying and being sent back to the past; you'll be preoccupied, too.
"Of what? Raiden always had been your priority."
"You have no idea," I muttered.
"What?"
"Nothing…"
"So, are you coming or not?" he pressed.
I bit my lower lip. I could clearly remember the events of today. I know I'm not going to be able to attend the concert. But a part of me wants to confirm if I would be able to this time. Suppose this time would differ from how the events played the first time.
"Chie…" Kenji urged from the opposite side of the line.
"I'm coming." I finally decided. "Give me 10 minutes."
I jumped off my chair and ran towards the bathroom.
Since I seem to have traveled to the past, I'm taking this as a second chance at life and will try to live it as differently as I can from how I lived it the first time. What if this was an opportunity given to me to change my life entirely, and I ended up missing it because I was too indecisive?
That's right, Chie. You've lived your life supporting others in your previous life. Try living this life for yourself this time!
I eventually switched off my phone when it started ringing for the 3rd time and shoved it into my backpack before slinging it over my shoulder. But before I got out of Kenji's car, I caught the weird expression on his face while watching me.
"What?" I inquired, my brows furrowed.
"Do you have a boyfriend you've been keeping from me?" he asked, frowning.
"What?" I asked the second time, suppressing a laugh. "Where did that come from?" I added, shaking my head. I opened the car door and exited the car.
He was out of his car seconds after I did. And he was not about to let the topic go.
"Your phone has been ringing all the way here. It's your secret boyfriend, right?" he asked again, his eyes squinting.
"It's not because I don't have one," I answered, half-laughing as I started to walk out of the parking lot and towards the arena where the concert would be held.
"Who would be calling you then?" Kenji continued, hot on my heels. "And why didn't you answer?"
"It's a wrong number," I answered.
"How would you know? You didn't even answer the calls."
Of course, I knew who was calling. It was the HR from the company I was supposed to transfer to. This was the exact reason I couldn't attend this concert the first time. Because I received a call that I got the high-paying job I was gunning for. And they need me to sign the contract this very same afternoon.
In the past, I chose the job over the concert because my family needed me to have a higher salary. This way, I'd be able to support my younger brother's studies, and I'll be able to provide them with a better life.
But not this time. This time, I would be choosing myself. This might be selfishness, but thinking about how my pitiful life ended that night, I'm determined to live this second life prioritizing my happiness.
"I just know," I answered instead. I stopped in my tracks and turned to face him. "Don't worry, okay? If I ever get into a relationship, you will be the first to know."
"' You sure?" he furrowed his brows. "You've always kept your relationships from me until the bastards break your heart, and then it would be my turn to break their bones. You know, letting me assess them earlier might actually help you avoid dickheads that need avoiding."
"Sure, Dad. I'll keep that in mind the next time." I sarcastically said and started marching away again.
"Kenji! That's Kenji!" we heard someone shouting.
"Shit!" Kenji cursed beside me.
I was just about to look at the person calling my buddy when Kenji grabbed my arm and started running, dragging me along with him.