Trrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Trrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Trrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
I groan and open my eyes slowly, I can feel all the crust breaking apart as I do so.
Sitting up I take the phone and bring it to my ear, "Rosaleigh." I grumble, the line is silent.
"What's wrong?" My eyes widen at the voice on the other side, and widen even further at the concern it's laced in.
I look down at my watch, it's quarter to three which means I just fell asleep.
"What makes you think something is wrong?" I ask, there is shuffling on the other side before he answers.
"You left with that Julio boy for an hour and now Nicholas claims that your mood has completely changed." He states.
So they know each other.
I stand up and make head for the connected bathroom, "How does that concern either of you? With all due respect." I ask, my eyes fall unto the mirror which reflect me right now.
"Damn." I whisper lowly to myself, my hair looks like it's been through some electromagnetic waves, mascara taints my cheeks with the streaks of tears as an exception.
My lips are cracked, my eyes bloodshot red and pieces of crust in my eyelashes. "Rosaleigh Blu Clarkson–"
I don't focus on the rest of his sentence, because I decide to wash my face so I put it on the counter. When I hear the murmurs get a little more distinct, I put him on loud speaker.
"–I'm flying back...did you hear anything I just said?" I stare at the phone with my eyebrows furrowed before I hum a hesitant 'no'.
A soft sigh comes from the other side, "Rosaleigh." I hear him whisper, I don't think I was supposed to hear that but I did and I can't help the ache in my heart.
I have a lot more to focus on, on my plate and me liking the sound of my name on my boss's tongue shouldn't be there.
God. Here we go again.
I don't know if I'm overthinking it but, it's like he pronounces every letter individually. He drags out the 'R' a little longer than others and almost emphasizes on the '-saleigh' part.
He doesn't say my name a lot which I think is why I like it, but that isn't the reason for the ache in my heart.
He sounded...
Sad.
Disappointed.
I know I may sound a little crazy, I did just wake up but I can differentiate between his tones. I haven't heard the tone of those two emotions, but I identified them very quickly.
I don't even know why they make my heart ache and bother me, they just do. It can't be for no absolute reason.
"You don't have to fly back today, I'm alright, everything is alright. I just had a bad afternoon, that's all." I respond leaving the bathroom and heading to my office.
"I'm done with everything here, I'll be there tomorrow." Before I can even argue, he ends the call.
I fall into my chair, sighing. I cover my face with my hands and push them over my forehead and pull back my hair.
After staying like that for a few seconds, I stand up to leave but my phone rings. I expect it to be Mr Grey but instead it's Nic.
"Hey." I put up a fake cheery voice, I hear the shut of a door in the background and a bell before he responds.
"I'm fetching your sister right now. You go deal with your brother, take all the time you need." My movements halt.
How the f*ck does he know?
He reads my mind, he tells me about Julio and apologizes. I sigh grabbing my bag, "Can you please just... don't tell anyone about this. Not even Grey." I warn pleadingly.
"I promise you, but I won't promise you that he won't find out soon. If I can find out, he definitely can." He ends the call before I can respond.
Men.
When I get downstairs and outside, I see Aaron already waiting for me by the SUV. He gives me a brief nod, which I return. Once we're all buckled up, he looks at me through the rearview mirror.
"Where to?" He asks, I dread the words that come out of my mouth.
"62nd precinct." I tell him, he gives me a curious look before nodding, starting the car and driving off.
On the way there I think about how, I broke down earlier. I don't know when but I'm pretty sure after the first tear, the shower didn't need more coaxing.
I remember thinking about what Logan has done, gone through and is going through. I trusted that he was done, but in all fairness I thought that five times before, before he relapsed again. Disappointing me and everyone else.
The tears just kept flowing. I broke down. Even though I didn't want to, even though I knew crying won't help him out of this.
The disappointment in me still lives, I don't know what to do when I get there.
Yell at him?
Didn't work the first time.
Tell him I'm disappointed?
Maybe it worked, but maybe it didn't.
Ignore him?
That's what I'm planning on doing, I won't waste my breath on him nor my energy and emotionally drain myself.
It takes us another twenty minutes, before we arrive at the precinct. I make no move to exit, I just stare at the familiar doors that I think I've walked through seven times in the last five years, make today eight.
They haven't changed that much, the golden bronzed frame still frames the designed glasses. The same crack on the bottom left corner and halfway through the other one, nothing has changed.
At all.
I look at the rearview mirror, where Aaron is looking at me with concerned eyes. He sees my sadness and worry but nods for me to go in.
I take one last glance at the doors before I gain the courage and open the car door and march in there.
*~*~*~*