Axel
I am like miles away from home and there is no way my family will find me, but the only thing that I am worries about was my eldest Brother Kalgeo and only he is the one I keep my hopes on no one else.
It was my 4th birthday and I got cards and presents from mom and Gran but my dad and brothers forgot it. For many it is nothing but for a kid of 4 it is a big deal and he craves it though he doesn't show it.
It this for the benefit of my being cross is happened till my 10 th birthday on which mom came back and yet I am waiting for the apology from them but it hasn't come yet.
It took a very long time to calm my anger and now I don't expect them for anything not even Kalgeo as he same when it comes to his matches and sports. I am ignored when it's games and remembered when assignments come up me being gifted academically.
It angers and disappoints me to be in this family well for many the riches of my family would be enough but not for me I want a family that cares about my existence.
I sit here today in front of avast ocean and seek peace only in winds and waves 🌊 it comes up with many new thoughts it takes me to think that I wasted a lot of my time on such usless
emotions that arise and have like thousands of inputs like energy and time but with no output so I wanna change that. But how to change everything now it seems late and I am very sophisticated person I hate being imperfect. But humans by default are imperfect.
It took like hours to wrap my head around a solid idea and then it struck me that I should pay a agency to hire me and then I should become a idolidol the thing want to become from childhood but couldn't because I was afraid of many things like exposure and people and I was uncomfortable with crowds but now it seems like the only option around the corner.
I took my phone out and searched the same
HOW TO BECOME AN KPOP IDOL
This is a transcript I read on net
"Presenter: This is Newkidd. They want to be the next big K-pop band. They've all left home to try and make it.
Kang Seung-chan: Sometimes I really miss my family.
Presenter: But there's a lot to be gained. BTS and Blackpink have smashed records and made history. Their music videos have been watched millions of times online.
Fan: Trying to get a concert ticket is nearly impossible in Korea.
Kids: K-pop!
Presenter: There are even K-pop schools, where kids can train to be just like them.
Kid: K-pop makes my heart burst with joy!
Presenter: So, what does it take to be a K-pop star? This is Gangnam, in the capital city of Seoul. Some of the biggest K-pop labels are here and it's where I'm meeting new K-pop band Newkidd as they rehearse.
Newkidd: Annyeong haseyo Newkidd imnida. We are Newkidd!
Presenter: Newkidd have just debuted with their first album. That means they're one step closer to making it. But it's not easy to get to this stage. K-pop stars first need to be signed as a trainee by a big record label. It's only then that they're in the running to be picked as a solo artist or as part of a band. They're all pretty young. The maknae, or baby of the group, is just 15 years old.
Kang Seung-chan: Hi, guys. My name is Kang Seung-chan and I'm 15 years old. Yeah, right, I'm the youngest member of the team. Please call me maknae.
Presenter: They're so determined to make it, they've left their homes and families behind to follow their dreams.
Kang Seung-chan: Sometimes I really miss my family. I feel like I have to make my dream come true, to make them proud.
Newkidd member: We're always on a strict diet and it's mostly salads, chicken and fruits. We do weightlifting, skipping and press-ups to stay in shape.
Newkidd member: Rehearsing and living with my bandmates, I feel like I've found not just friends but they're like family too. I'm really happy whenever I'm with them.
Presenter: There can be big rewards, though. Blackpink's single 'Kill This Love' was viewed over 56 million times on YouTube within 24 hours. And look at BTS: they've made history by being the first Korean act to have a number-one album in the UK chart. One study has even gone as far as saying that they are the reason one in 13 tourists visit South Korea. And they've even shared their message of self-love with the world at the United Nations.
RM: I am who I am, with all of my faults and my mistakes.
Presenter: Lots of kids want to grow up to be just like them. This is a K-pop training school. Most hopefuls start out by going to singing and dance classes.
Kid: I want to be a K-pop star because I want to be on the stage singing and dancing in front of crowds of people. K-pop makes my heart burst with joy!
Kid: Remembering the dance routines is tough at first but I practise at home too and I've got better.
Presenter: That dance class is so tough! They're working so, so hard but there are people in other K-pop schools working just as hard, who only face a very small chance of actually making it. At this school alone, I'm told that there are about a thousand students who want to be K-pop stars, but only around 40 to 50 will actually make it.
Feel: Not everyone is going to be a K-pop star by just doing all the classes. Some will make it and some will not. It depends on how hard they work and how much effort they put in.
Presenter: One famous face to come out of the school is iKon's Dunghyuk Kim. He's now signed with one of the biggest K-pop labels.
Dunghyuk Kim: Some of the guys are, like, training for, like, ten years and some guys for, like, six years. Every day, every night, every morning we sing, dance, we care about our bodies. So that is really hard.
Presenter: iKon haven't charted here in the UK yet, but they're pretty big in South Korea.
Presenter: Were there ever moments in … when you were training and even now where you've doubted yourself and thought, 'You know what, maybe I can't do this?'
Dunghyuk Kim: Totally, yeah. We think that a lot.
iKon member: The most difficult thing for me wasn't the physical training. It was the mental side of it and thinking, 'Will I ever make it?' Not knowing that is the most difficult part.
iKon member: We have to, like, like, train hard before we get to be somebody, you know what I mean? Like, but after that, every moment when we, like, perform on the stage or like, like, practise together, like those moments are like blessings, you know what I mean?"
Took me to bizzare round of emotions
then I read this too
"Before K-pop singers were stars, they were trainees. Trainees live, train, and perform together starting at a very young age. Some trainees start as young as 11 years old, but many don't get discovered and join a company until they're in their late teens, so don't despair if you're a little older! Many K-pop trainees and idols are Korean, but it's not an absolute requirement to be Korean - people of all ethnicities and races can audition. Skill and persona have a lot to do with your potential success, as does your willingness to do hard work."
Then I went to another site it went up things like
"K-pop, which stands for 'Korean pop', is a multi-billion-pound music industry. It is not only popular in South Korea, but also all around the world.
Successful K-pop groups like BTS - who were the first Korean act to have a number one album in the UK charts - are among the most successful groups in the music industry.
Artists can rack up millions of views on YouTube within just a few hours of posting a video. Gangnam Style by Psy is currently the fifth most-watched video on the streaming site, with 3.8 billion views in total so far.
A study has even claimed that BTS is in fact responsible for one in every 13 tourists who visit South Korea.
In order to become a K-pop star, a person needs to be signed as a trainee by a big K-pop label.
But in order to get to this point, many aspiring stars start their journey very young.
They may start by having singing and dancing classes, before attending special schools for students who want to follow in the footsteps of their K-pop idols.
Once they've been successfully signed by a label, the hopefuls can be picked to be a solo artist or part of a bigger group.
But setting out to become a K-pop star is not for the faint-hearted. It is an incredibly competitive industry.
Newsround visited a K-pop school in South Korea attended by around 1,000 students. Out of those, only around 40 to 50 students will manage to make careers in the industry.
"The most difficult thing for me wasn't the physical training," a member of successful K-pop group called iKON told Newsround. "It was the mental side of it and thinking 'will I ever make it?' Not knowing that is the most difficult part."
Some hopefuls may train for up to 10 years before they finally break through in the industry - and others may train for years and never quite realise their dream.
For many though, the risk is worth it. The K-pop industry is worth billions of pounds and K-pop stars can make a lot of money.
Music videos can be streamed many millions of times and stars will be idolised by fans all around the world."
And then the same transcript was seen that I had seen in the first site.
But the feel of the stage and it's Grandeour attracted me , the first time I went there was when I was 6 the music, the clothes ,the dance and everything that was there felt so amazing many were happy to see them but I wanted to join them on stage I wanted this love of people that I didn't get .
so I made it my mission to first enroll in music and dance school as the first step.