I run away, I run away frantically as if I was being hunted down. I run away with no sense of direction, the world flies past. I didn't think, I didn't do anything, all I did was run. Run. Run. Run.
And then, before I knew it, I was alone. I collapse onto the damp soil and stare up at the trees, then from the sky came the first whisper of rain, seconds later turning into a heavy rainfall, flooding from the heavens. my eyes instinctively flinched as the heavy droplets of water landed on them, and I lie there. Taking in the rain. An arbitrary amount of time passes, it could have been minutes, it could have been hours.
Where's Fiao.
I get off my back and take a look around as if she was somehow right beside me. Fiao should have been on an emissary during some negotiations with the Abdza. Was she attacked as well? Is she okay? I gotta...
I gotta... what? What could I possibly do to change anything going on right now? I ran away. The king has just been slain, and as the prince, I just ran away. It's pathetic and shameful, something out of character for me. All thoughts about my father's death and Fiao's whereabouts eroded away as I got onto my feet with a new determination. I need to get back and deal with this situation. I'm the only one who can do it. But the confidence in those thoughts were no longer there. Who was my dad really? Was he truly the strongest if another human was able to defeat him in a fight? When he was so desperate that he fell for his opponent's tricks, was willing to sacrifice his own son for his survival? Was he really the person that I thought he was? If so, if that's the man who keeps telling me that I'm great, then... what am I really?
I trudge my way through the forest until I had stumbled onto a trail. Jeez, I really went far didn't I? When I ran, I instinctively changed my tetsu to wind, giving myself a large boost in speed. Ah, what should I do when I get back? First I have to formally announce the king's death, we have to go through a ceremony and everything, but I look like a mess right now. I try flexing my fingers but they felt stiff and uncomfortable as a result of the cold, and then we have to put a bounty out for that Thiazi guy maybe 600 billion, can't let him get away with the assassination of the king. Then, I become king... Right? Do I know enough? Am I capable enough? Have I attended enough of those meetings? Ah man I'm nervous, this really came out of left field I got no time to prepare.
I struggle with each step, stumbling and losing my balance. My entire body felt sore beyond belief. The side-effects of the frost have finally caught up to me, the effects of chilling, then heating up rapidly must have caused some damage to my body. Ah, it's the city! I frantically stagger my way out of the forest, every step causing immense pain throughout my entire body.
I see the first human being every since I ran away, I give off a smile of relief and continue trouncing through the streets with renewed vigor. I made my way through the streets, nearing the palace when I stumble upon a crowd of people. Gathered around the site where Thiazi made his announcement.
"Make way for the prince!" I shout as I run through the crowd, I have to address these people, let everyone know that everything is okay because I'm here.
It wasn't long until I realized that something was off. I slow down to a walk as I register the sudden change in attitude. It was a sight I'd never seen before. From the moment I was born, I had never seen anyone, that wasn't my father nor sister, that kept their head high in my presence. As if I was an attraction, like a circus animal of some sort. I begin walking backwards, backing off, the crowd forming a ring around where I stood.
"What are you doing..." I whisper, why? Why aren't they…
"WHY ARE NONE OF YOU LOWERING YOUR HEADS!" I scream, my voice resembling that of a whiny kid.
"I'M THE SON OF THE KING, ACTUALLY I AM THE KING NOW! WHERE'S THE RESPECT FOR SOMEONE GREAT?" I ramble, ranting angrily, my voice hoarse, cracking frequently.
I feel something strike the back of my head. Huh? What just happened. I rub the back of my head and look down, a smooth round pebble sat on the ground
"Get out of here!" A voice ran out. I spin around trying to find the source of that voice.
"I will beat the shit out of you if you stay here any longer!"
"That tyrant has finally been slain, we don't need another one to take his place!" Another voice, I frantically try to locate who was making these threats, and then another voice rings out, a fourth, a fifth, a sixth, seventh. Until the whole crowd was shouting against me.
Enough... the world blurs as the voices begin to blend into one massive tide. People edge closer and closer to me, some daring to throw whatever they had at hand at me. Stop it. Stop it. STOP IT! The inside of my body begins to heat up as, flames erupt out of the ground in a spiral around me.
"ENOUGH OF YOUR IMPUDENCE, LOWER YOUR HEADS NOW!"
What am I doing.
"OR I WILL MURDER EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU!"
Stop it. You're being pathetic right now.
I increase the intensity of the flames, making it so that everyone has to back away.
Actually, am I being pathetic? Or is it that I simply am pathetic.
My flame shudders as someone tries to put it out with water, their tetsu was weak but others began to join in, making me struggle to maintain the wall.
What am I really? Lashing out at the first sign of disagreement, Losing control of my emotions.
"GET AWAY FROM ME!"
All I know is that I'm not great. I don't even know what greatness is.
I struggle to continue supplying the wall of flame, the people were gradually making ground against me.
And my father, I know he wasn't great either, or else none of this would have ever happened, people would have respected him, and me as well.
My wall breaks as the townsfolk come flooding through.
All this anger, this hatred, they must have kept it bottled up in fear of their lives every time I walked through the streets. So I never knew just how dumb I was.
I turn around in preparation to defend myself.
I now realize something. The way my father defined strength was to push the weak back down. That way no one could ever rise to their level and challenge us.
I hold my hand out and let a blast of air out launching the people attacking me into the air like a cannonball.
That's not being strong, that's being a coward.
"Out of the way!" I turn around, grabbing a man by the face and slamming him into the ground.
And I... am just that.
I kick off my feet and begin running away. Back into the forest which I came from.
Do I even deserve to be alive?
I keep running until I finally pause to catch my breath, somewhere in the outer parts of town. No one pursuing me.
A tiny figure suddenly pops out of nowhere blocking my path. It was holding a knife. My eyes widen, and my face twists in anguish. It was that boy again. The boy which I met back during my 17th birthday. His eyes no longer shone with innocence, his hands weren't shaking despite holding a murder weapon, nor did he seem scared. Instead, he stared at me with hatred, and as he charges at me, my soul shatters.
I stare ahead in a shocked trance as the boy plunges the knife into my thigh, not being tall enough to reach my abdomen. He then stumbles and falls on the ground. Not used to the momentum.
I continue staggering, my mind and my body were no longer connected. I ran with nothing but instinct alone.
I begin tearing off my clothing, my insignia which proved my status as someone who was a part of the royal family. My robe, superfluous and needlessly extravagant, my tunic, made out of incredibly expensive materials designed to resist the elements, embroidered with intricate designs and patterns. Until I was left with nothing but a plain T-shirt and trousers. Yes, this is who I truly am-trash. It took 17 years of my life, but I finally came upon the right conclusion. I hate my father, my sister… she's just as bad as me, but she can become better. But for me... there's no turning back, I utterly and completely hate myself.
I never saw, nor heard of Fiao ever again.
6 Months Later
I place one foot down, then the next, then the next, the bottom of my feet, cracked and bleeding, from the harsh jagged stones that made the path. Levitating landforms surrounded the sky, the ground had been divided into uneven individual platforms, with cracks frequently running across the land, splitting the land into a series of exceptionally thin islands. If one look down into the cracks, they would see the sky reflected back at them, as if the sky had formed a sphere around the onlooker, in which every direction was filled with the light blue aurora of the atmosphere. It was like the world had become stuck in suspended animation during it's creation. A fractured scene, one that was never meant to be, creating an endless day.
I slow down and sit down cross legged, looking down, right on the edge of the void, and continue staring at it for 3 hours and 26 minutes before I broke my gaze away.
"It's getting longer every time." I murmured. I had no idea what jumping off would entail. It might be instant death, I might fall through the sky forever, I might end up in a different world, those who jumped could never be talked to ever again, and eventually even their names would be forgotten.
The history books say that this place was created by the rogue during The End. The rogue separated the two sides from each other with this display of immense power and declared that if any one of them attacked each other. He would do to the entire world what he did to this place. Supposedly the two armies left, then returned the next day to battle once more but were greeted by the rogue, after he had stayed there all night, making sure that there was going to be no more bloodshed. Some of the Ankudo tried to call the being by its bluff and made a run for it, but fell through the world and were simply erased from history.
If the Tetsudo tried to launch attacks across the barrier, those who tried that simply dropped dead on the spot, and when the armies tried to change locations, the being simply appeared once more, and created another rift, ultimately creating a series of these locations that would collectively be known as the world river, as it signified the barrier between two worlds. Or maybe our entire recollection of history is wrong, and this place signified something different. Who knows.
"Well, it's time to head back." I get off the ground and begin the walk back to the labor camp. After wandering through the world, incredibly hungry, sick from giving into my hunger pains and consuming raw meat, tired from being unable to fall asleep. I stumbled across this little place, where I was given good food, a comfortable bed, and shelter. I looked around and realized that this was a camp for producing crystals that could store and channel Tetsu. I had no idea where I was going to go, so I offered my skills in exchange for letting me live here. Luckily, I never got recognized, and I've been staying here ever since. This place happened to be close to the world river since there were copious amounts of tetsu rising from the ground from the corpses of our soldiers that died hundreds of years ago, making for easy production of crystals. I'm also assuming that anku could also be harvested here, but only the envoys from the other side could detect and use it.
I begin walking back, but quickly stop and look back down at the false sky. Escape, the one word resonated deep in the back of my mind, over and over again. Those cracks were an escape, and it resonated louder every single day. An escape from this world, an escape from this reality, an escape from having to ever think again, if I jump down there. Will everyone forget about me? Will everything about me be erased like it was never there in the first place?
"Oh, what do we have here? A boy trying to run away from his troubles?" I swiftly turn around. There stood a gorgeous woman sitting, levitating off the air with her hand on her chin, looking bored. She wore a flowery blooming dress that shuddered and puffed out in the wind, giving the impression that she was much larger than she actually was.
"Who are you?" I growl, annoyed at her casual attitude.
"A better question would be who are you? I can feel that there's a loose connection between me and you, but I can't seem to figure out why." She looks down pensively.
"Ah I got it! You're the son of Orn right?"
I draw a sharp intake of breath at being recognized for my former position, and back away from her, fearful of what she was going to say next.
"You don't like being called that do you? What, did you get into a falling out with that man? Don't worry it happens pretty frequently."
"No! I just..." I suddenly shouted.
"You just what?" The woman dropped down from the air. "Do you want redemption? Do want revenge? Do you want to forget? Be absolutely sure that you convey your true feelings when you answer me."
My mind jumbles, hundreds of emotions run through me at once. I begin taking deep gaping breaths, tears, springing out of my eyes. Until all my thoughts converged, to one single point.
"I just want to die." I said, feeling the calmest I've been in a while, declaring this to a complete stranger I've never met before.
The woman stares at me for a couple of seconds then yawns and flies back off the ground
"Well, good luck with that. I'm not going to be the one to give therapy for you."
She lazily drifts away.
"However, As a parting gift. I will show you what death feels like." She holds her hand out, fingers pointed towards me. On instinct I jump back, but a massive force slams into my body before I could react, throwing me off the rocks and into the void. I switch to wind and attempt to make a current, reversing the direction, but it was futile under her immense power, as I continued being pushed into the void.
So this is it huh? The final chapter of my miserable life, well it's a fitting end for someone who...
Huh? Why am I falling? I begin flailing around in panic. Trying to fly back up, but there was a terrifying force pushing me down.
Why is this happening to me? Stop it I...
Hold on, where even am I? I have to get back to the castle! Father is going to kill me if I get caught lazing around like-
Father... There was a mysterious hole in my memories every time I tried to recall what he looked like, or who he even was.
My memories continue being taken away from me as I fall, from memories of my sister, of my childhood, I forget all my skills and talents at Thaumergy.
My name is Cain.
My name is...
My eyes glaze over as my entire identity is stripped away from me, as I become an empty husk of a human being.
I stare at my fingers in bewilderment as they began to dissolve away. Seconds later, I couldn't see anymore. I became deaf, all sensations and feelings disappeared.
The being drifts across the empty void, unable to think, unable to feel, it was only existing, and soon it would cease to even do that. In the distance, a voice could be heard.
"That should be far enough. Better reel him back up before I start to forget him as well."
First comes the body. I regain my sight. I look around like a confused animal at the sensory overload. Another memory reappears in my head, Cain...
Memories begin flooding back into my head as I shoot back into the sky. I launch back through the ground high into the air and land on my back.
I gasp heavily, as I struggle to take in the experience.
"What just happened to me!" I began retching even though there was nothing in my stomach.
"Something you were just about to throw yourself into forever, and I gotta say, after experiencing death a couple of times myself. It's something you should never want."
I back away from the edge, now fearful of what that abyss held. "Well, color me impressed, you still hold most of your sanity after that experience, maybe I didn't let you descend far enough hmm?"
"No, no, no, get me away from this place. I never want to see it ever again." I say back off and then make a dash for solid land.
As she grows smaller in the distance, the lady looks away and mumbles something before disappearing into thin air.
"Hey, what are you doing! Are you leaving already?" I heard a shout somewhere off in the distance as I ran through the camp. I run to my living quarters, taking my shoes, stuffing my spare clothing, and leftover food into a bag, and then I run off.
Ahh, I'm such a failure, I can't even build up the nerve to want to die, even though there is nothing left for me anymore. I scream at the heavens as I dash through the pine trees, and I continue screaming, until my breath runs out, and then after that I take another breath and scream some more. I never believed in a God, a higher being of existence controlling all of reality, but in this moment the only one who could hear me was that being in the heavens. I want to escape from it all, there's nothing left for me here, but I don't want to die, so what do I do?
I slow down and begin panting, breathless from all the yelling and running. There is that, I suppose. A single alternative to grant me my wish. I chuckle, to launch myself in the middle of a era defining war huh? Would that really be preferable to wandering aimlessly in this place I don't belong anymore?
I see my breath come out of my mouth as a white vapor, and look to the sky, to see snow. Yes, without a doubt. The Ankudo's that came through made it explicitly clear that those of us who were selected in the 100 year exchange would be expected to choose sides and fight after they came through. However, that's fine, as long as I can repent in the slightest for my existence, all I have to do, is make sure I fight for the correct side I need to be on the good side this time. Yes... I squeeze my fist tight, I'll make sure to do that.