Song recommendations: Runrunrun Dutch Melrose
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Gush of wind in my hair and face,I was finding it hard to breathe because the pressure was to much. It felt like I wouldn't reached the ground, because I had been falling for a while now, felt I might die of suffocation before I reached the ground. After a while my body reached the ground, it felt so bad but i couldn't scream, the pain was unbearable. The pain enveloped my whole body, I opened my eyes to see blood everywhere, i could feel blood pouring from my head covering my sight, I couldnt feel my hands or legs. Why am I not dead? Ahhhhhh, I screamed in my mind because I couldn't scream out. All I could do was watch, could barely open my eyes. I could feel my eyes shutting, my breathe seizing. Is this it, Will I finally die? Will be I finally break free from the bounds of suffering. I could hear faint voices of people, and so many foot steps.
"OH MY GOD!! someone call an ambulance".
"Was she pushed?".
"maybe it was a suicide attempt".
"Is she alive?".
"Such a question, didn't you see the height she fell from?"
" I just checked her pulse, her heart is still beating".
"she survived a fall like that,it's a miracle". Everywhere finally went dark, all sounds were cut off.
I could feel a bright light shining in my eyes, I squinted my eyes open to see a blue light. I couldn't move my body at all, I opened my eyes fully to see I was in cast from head to toe and also administered drip. Why, why, why?, I cried. This is not far, I fell from a far height, broke all my bones, I should be dead.
The orphanage I stayed in took care of the bills, I was discharged from the hospital a year after being brought in. The doctors were highly surprised that I healed, all my broken bones healed, I am supposed to be a vegetable. Those months I stayed in the hospital was hell, countless of insullts, scoldings and abuses. They were several occasions when the older kids of the orphanage would come, some will either turn of my oxygen machine, or tamper with my drips or drugs. I wasn't able to talk then, so I couldn't tell the nurses who did so. The head mistress would come once in a while, but not for well wishing but to tell me how peaceful the orphanage had been while I was away, how before I came and how all I brought was bad luck. she always called me a witch, a demon, Because a normal human can't survive a fall that height and heal so quick.
"As worthless and useless as you are, you were better of as a vegetable with little hope of living", she cursed. i couldn't live or die in peace, neither could I stay in the hospital in peace. I was finally being discharged from the hospital after an extra month because the doctor wanted to monitor my improvement, or if id have any side issues. the head mistress came for her final torment and abusive lecture, before she'd continue at the orphanage. She always insulted me in secret, and when someone passed or walked into the room, she'd turn into the broken and carrying mother hen.
'how can the world be this cruel, such a young girl'.
"You little delinquent, a nuisance to the society,all you do is cause trouble",she said looking at me with plain disgust. "You've finally been discharged to rake havoc at the orphanage once again,God have mercy on my poor soul",she said dramatically raising both her hands in the air. I stood up from the bed and walked to the door. "Why would I ever want to go back there? you've only treated me like a slave and also as an animal, I'd rather fend for myself than die there" I said reminiscing the past. the memories of how she would make me do all the chores while the others played, gave me so little portion of food or sometimes non at all. Some days the older kids would lock me up in the dark store room for hours if not days, and she wouldn't even bat an eye lead, no one deserved to live that way. Because of the little I was fed, I had to find a work that would earn me enough to buy a meal to sustain me that day. It wasn't easy to find work, because I was little, so it wouldn't look like child labour. But I was persistent, I was jumping and jumping jobs to make ends meet, it took me morning till late night. Not as if the people in the orphanage cared if I got missing, or died.
"That's wonderful news, I can finally have peace of mind. A great burden being lifted of my shoulder" she rejoiced placing her hands on her chest. "honestly i wish you died along side your parents in that car crash, or during this recent incident. Look at so much money I wasted on your treatment" she said with so much hatred. She didn't have a choice, I was under her care. She even had to answer the police and write statements because I was a child of her orphanage. I couldn't take anymore of her taunts, why did she always bring up my car accident when deep down she knows it triggers a lot, how can someone be this cruel. "ENOUGH, it is enough!!".
"Excuse me?", she asked in disbelieve and shock. "I've taken enough of your insults and bad mouthing, but I'm fed up with you bad mouthing my parents. My parents were my pillar of happiness and they still are, I don't want such clean name to be impure with your bad tongue. Keep the stupid orphanage to your self, cause im not coming back", I poured out with no regrets, she needed to know, Im no longer the pushover she once knew. The months of torture and listening to her whining, I got fed up.
The look on the head mistress face said she was dumfounded, because I have never raised my voice nor complained about anything, or about the way she treated me.
I opened the door, looking back at the witch for the last time, then walked, slamming the door shut. On my way outside of the hospital, I broke down in tears. For years I've been grieving the loss of my parents,all she did was rub salt to my wounds. No more. No more insults, no more torture. "I might want to die, but not through her" I said in tears walking away.