As I mumble to myself I hear it echo throughout the prison.
The only place I truly feel alive is in my mind. An entire building for myself yet I'm bound to chains, stuck in filthy a prison cell.
I close my eyes and try to reminiscence my past life, I try to remember the good things, the good warm sweet memories of my childhood playing call of duty, exploring abandoned houses with my friends, and killing those evil black cats that always stare at me the wrong wa-
.....
The only things that I remember are the bad things, those sweet memories never existed, all lies.
I was raised in a simple family with a father a mother and a younger brother, they all showed me affection, gave me food to eat put a roof above my head but I just never cared.
School and my Teenage years are all but a blur to me.
Now at 21, I killed a man for trying to disrupt my peace and here I am In jail.
Every day is kind of the same some would call that depressing but I call it reassuring, I try to change but I'm starting to accept myself.
I open my eyes to see the rusty prison bars, In solitary confinement, Chains around my arms and Legs, I can hardly move not even granted the basic dignity to wipe my ass.
All I've done is meditated, I've meditated for 3 months nothing works, I try to remember positive memories and positive thoughts but I feel better when I don't remember.
Every time I remember the "bad" things I start to laugh a little.
That's when it hit me.
I'm not a good person.
I'm an evil motherfucker who's going to rot in this trashy prison all by myself until I die.
I've been here for 3 months and no one else has stepped foot in this prison other than the guards to wipe my ass and give me food.
"Humans cannot be born evil" is a concept many people believe in for some shitty fucking reason. Experiences, environment, and how you are raised will determine the type of man you will become.
It's bullshit, It's all brainwashing either that or I'm not human.
"I didn't choose to be this way."
"I didn't consent to be born like this."
This is all victimized pussy talk, I swear men these days are such pussies, I don't promote suicide, life is wonderful but for crying out loud SHUT UP! no one cares about your struggle just grow up.
Ever since my very first memories, I have been committing vile and evil acts, I've been beaten, tortured, and betrayed but never in my life have I ever cried about it.
As a matter of fact, I'm just glad to be alive and in good health, I wish I wasn't in this prison cell but we don't always get what we want in life.
Truth is I wouldn't hurt a fly unless it touched me first. Unless the fly is ugly? I don't know. I only kill children if they disrupt my peace why are you always crying shut the fuck up!
If a woman laughs at me it disrupts my cognitive I have to get rid of her, their voices are all so high-pitched and annoying.
It's not that serious, is it? I just want to live a quiet life.
The only reason I'm here is that I shot up an entire group of protesters because they wouldn't shut the fuck up at 9 PM in the night, I'm trying to sleep here why are you being so selfish?
The sound of a rusty metal door opens, as a set of 10 army soldiers enter the room.
On my back chained to this concrete "bed", I look downwards at my feet trying to see over my chest awaiting my next meal.
"This is him, Governor General," a feminine voice says
As she pulls out her clipboard she dictates, "Pete Ink a 21-year-old man, 6'0 Long unkept hair, has 3 tattoos on his right arm and 2 on the shoulder, he is fairly toned, acts as a homeless man, eyewitnesses say they have seen him sleeping under multiple trees each week, he went under our noses for 5 years, until being caught sexually assaulting a woman behind the grocery store."
"That's not true-"
"Shut the fuck up you fucking ape!" As the soldier Shoots at the heavily barred prison cell, he misses on purpose.
"Well, what can we use him for", the governor says.
"Well, he acts as if he has mental instabilities but from what I've gained he's the perfect subject for Operation Red."
"Operation Red, What the fuck is that?" Pete is visibly confused
As the woman continues to speak, "That's why we're here to explain to you what you have to do. Operation Red is a research mission, you and a few other death row convicts will be sent into space to research and take pictures of potential planets that are habitable for the human population."
.....