It all comes back to fate
I knew two years ago what the start of my Junior year would bring. Of course, multiple things can affect any path and ultimately change the outcomes of my visions. But, me being the persistent, stubborn person that I am and not giving up on knowing more than I probably should. I was able narrows the result down to two paths. Which I think is actually pretty impressive, if I must say so myself.
Either way, each option or path will be an interesting journey. It's the least I can hope for because I haven't had a whole lot of interesting in my life.
Today was going to be when I, Kira Catrina Burns and my wolf Yazmin would truly feel unwanted, rejected and scorned in the Zodiac Moon Pack, and it isn't even because of my visions.
Not many believe my visions, more like no one believes my visions. People feel the need for me to convince them that what I've said is true. They'd want a great big pile of proof and details. Often I couldn't give them because my visions weren't exact, at least not always, not like they are now. I didn't receive play-by-plays. It wasn't like watching a movie on a TV screen. Sometimes I would only get glimpses after a choice had been made, or I would relive visions of the consequence and the aftermath of their choices caused.
Which surprise... surprise... when I shared made people think I was crazy or an attention seeker, how they came to that conclusion, who knows. Their judgment and disbelief of what was right in front of their faces didn't make sense to me. But there is not much I can say about it or will say anymore.
When I was nine, I ran into the pack house hysterically crying about how there would be an attack. I didn't fully understand what I saw. I knew it was not something I wanted to come true. All I knew was that there would be death and destruction. I didn't know when I didn't know who, I didn't know why. I just knew it would happen, and lives in our pack would be lost. My mom didn't believe me. She never believed me. But, I was determined. I wouldn't stop until she took me to see Alpha Rains. I explained what I saw, and for a short time, Alpha consoled me and told me he would do everything he could to protect the pack.
Months passed, and nothing... absolutely nothing happened. Even though I was adamant, I kept telling them I wasn't wrong and that it would happen. People started treating me differently. Alpha Rains wouldn't allow me to see him or let me play with the Alpha children anymore. Luna Sapphire always looked at me with pitying eyes and my family. My family just looked at me like I was crazy.
My mom, dad and siblings started telling me I was an attention seeker, and no one believed me. Mom told pack members that I was making it up. She said I was saying these things because I was upset about her having another daughter and that I was acting out because she wasn't giving me all of her attention anymore. And everyone believed her. They all thought I was just jealous of my younger siblings. But I wasn't. I loved Lee and Brittany.
After the time, I stopped bringing it up. I stopped talking about it. No one believed me anyways, so I just stopped.
I'm not crazy, regardless of what everyone thinks. I understand from that experience that all sharing will do is turn me into an even bigger freak of the pack. More than I already am. My looks definitely do not help. I was born with white hair... yes, white, like paper white and the palest hazel eyes anyone has ever seen. And no one knows why even though, according to my parents, they had me tested as a baby, which explained nothing. I have learned to deal with it. I don't mind my eyes as much as my hair. I am dark-skinned, so the contrast can be jarring if you see me for the first time, hence why I started dying my hair. My parents were not happy my freshman year when I came home with deep purple and lavender locks. But they got over it when people stopped staring so much when we were out as a family.
It's been several years since the vision I shared with Alpha, and I can say the pack has long memories. They have not forgotten. And they remind every chance they get.
Don't get me wrong. It's not that I'm mistreated horribly. There is the usual name calling, pranks and a few altercations. But I'm made of stronger stuff. I'm never pushed further than I can handle. At least, that's how I feel. I've hardened my heart to my pack. I do still love them. I just don't trust them after everything they've done to me. So, yeah, I guess I'm bullied. I try not to wallow in that, though.
It may not be the best way to handle things, living with my head in the sand and not standing up for myself more. But what's a girl to do? Everyone, including my family, treats me like a pariah, and I don't have the patients for it all. So, yeah, that's why I keep my trap shut. There isn't much I can do about it. I didn't choose to be this way. I don't know why I am this way. But it's a part of who I am, and I've accepted that. It's just no one else has or ever will.
I've tried to learn more about myself, what I am and why I'm this way. There isn't a lot of information out there about sire wolves. Most of the text has been sent to the council and placed under lock and key. But, there were a few ancient texts I was able to sneak and read in the pack's restricted section of our library. Yes, I did, in fact, break a pack law to research myself and my origins. What do they expect me to do? Twiddle my thumbs and hope it goes away. Not likely.
You see... from what I gathered centuries ago. Sire wolves were respected and cherished as the story seems to go. One bad apple spoiled the bunch. It is said that the Moon Goddess Mawu felt that one of her creations was too dangerous after the deaths of thousands of innocent wolves, which in our text was labeled as the Dark Days.
As most stories go, and to tell a long story short. Either power or love brings people to their knees and makes them irrational, turning them into fools. What was said to have happened was that a sire wolf named Milani was mated to an alpha. It's said that her mate did not want to be mated. He tried to rule without the hindrance and softening that a mate is said to bring, even the most aggressive of mates.
Even though he did not want a mate, he enjoyed the power brought to his pack through a Luna. Long story short, he mated her but did not treat Milani as a mate. He cheated on her, abused her and used her. She eventually ran away, swearing vengeance on her cruel alpha mate, and got in the form of another alpha.
The sire Milani used her powers to destroy her mate by breaking the bond and bonding with his enemy. She used her visions to gain knowledge to forge alliances and also how to ruin ones she didn't agree with or want. Ultimately leading to the Dark Days, leading to the deaths of thousands of wolves who refused to fall at her feet. Milani became dark and power-hungry because she was scorned by one mate, ignoring the love of another.
So many lives were lost because of her inability to heal and move on.
The Fates and the Moon Goddess stepped in. Seeing the destruction a sire can cause, they decided that no sire would ever live again. They took the power of sire away from those who had reviled in the blessing, and no sire had been born or seen again for centuries.
Until now...
Until me.