"Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the end of the graduation ceremony. Once again, congratulations class batch 20**- 20**!"
In the large auditorium, the audience rose from their seats and cheered. Dani and the other honor students bowed and walked away from the podium. After collecting her things in her designated chair, she was heading to her friends when she stopped in her tracks. She realized that all of her friends were busy, surrounded by their own family and relatives.
No, all of them. It's like they have their own world. The people around her, gathered in groups were smiling and laughing. She stood there not knowing what to do. Somehow, she felt dizzy as if someone had hit her on the face. The room spun.
She squinted her eyes, thinking about what to do for a moment. She keeps touching her head, the way mothers pat their child's head to comfort them. She was about to head to the exit when, all of a sudden, a hand landed on her shoulder. She turned and faced Mr. Lehman.
"Where are you going?"
"I'm heading home, sir. And once again, thank you very much." She saw his usual straight face when he accompanied her on the way to the stage. But she was able to sense his sincerity.
"Is this how you should treat me?"
"Excuse me, Sir?"
"Remember I am your parent for today. You really lack some manners." Mr. Lehman apathetically scolded her.
Dani didn't know why he was picking a fight with her again. 'I thanked him but he's being like this...'
"Let's go." The teacher didn't speak anymore but he led the way out. She only followed him. The students stared at them, but mouthed a few words of congratulations when they passed by. She gave a forced smile or a nod in response. She also saw her friends watching her in the corner of her eye. She didn't forget to give them a reassuring smile.
'We will see each other at David's party later anyway. But now, I need to do some business.'
•••
Looking around, Dani is amazed. The whole interior of the restaurant gives her a sense of comfort. It is equipped with bulbs emitting a warm yellow light, increasing the tranquil atmosphere. The interior is coated with brown color as it is primarily composed of natural materials such as wood and greenery. The ceiling is also covered with vinelike plants that would fill your vision with healthy green colors. This is a perfect combination of modernity and natural beauty. When her companion, Mr. Lehman spoke, she stopped looking around.
"This is my favorite restaurant."
Dani is amazed. Her former teacher is really unique. She is sure that he's the only person who would say that kind of line with a scoff on his face. Dani is also aware that some of the customers and staff were looking at their direction.
She initially assumed it was because she was wearing a dress. It was the first time she had worn something like this, so she thought she might look weird. But hearing their whispering voice, it seemed like that's not the case.
"It looks like you have a big reputation here."
She tried to joke, attempting to alleviate the uneasiness between them. Their orders were delivered. Mr. Lehman cut the steak with his knife and began speaking after the server left.
"They said I'm weird and mocked me for always being alone. I can't see what's wrong with that."
She didn't know what to say. It is true that Mr. Lehman is a lone wolf and she also doesn't think there's anything wrong with that. The truth is, she used to be like him... until the her friends surrounded her in her life. Amidst the silence, Mr. Lehman shouted something that literally made her jaw drop.
"Stop staring. If you're wondering, she's my granddaughter. You're making her uncomfortable."
'No.. it's not them, it's you.' Dani's lips twitched. She wanted to say something but decided to keep her mouth shut. Somehow, she feels embarrassed.
The people around them went back to their own business and they continued to eat in silence. But her mind was in a frenzy. Because she wanted to know. No... She must know. So she can understand what's going on. What is his intention and why is he doing all of this. And plan if there's a risk. A treacherous glint gleamed in her eyes.
'If I can't read him, I just have to ask him frankly...'
"Why?"
Mr. Lehman made eye contact and it was clear that he understood what she was asking.
"So that's why you came with me obediently."
"Don't change the subject."
"Well, I expected this because it's strange that you're not complaining."
"It's because you're doing me a favor and I'm not shameless enough to complain."
Dani stopped and then continued, "But at least I want to know."
She looked at him directly. "We're not even related, but you're always meddling in my affairs. In return, I have always complained about that."
'If you continue doing this, I might mistake you as my father.'
Mr. Lehman stopped eating. "So you're saying that I'm being meddlesome? You cheeky brat."
She didn't pay attention to his free attitude and continued to speak. "But it's strange, you're always criticizing me, but you're also doing me favors. It's always about my concern."
'That must be the reason why I did my best this year. In order to stop his criticisms, I did my best to avoid them.' Dani added inwardly.
"You're like what I had predicted. Very skeptical. You distrust human sincerity after receiving good things. It's not good to be like that." Mr. Lehman scoffed at her and asked.
"Do you still think like that about your friends? I thought that you'd finally learned your lesson."
"Of course not." Dani denied immediately. 'Although it is true that I doubted them in the beginning, it's different now.'
"That's good. But I think... that the one you don't trust is yourself."
"...."
"Don't look at me like that. Didn't you say you wanted to know why? It's because I find you troubling. I can't just leave you alone."
"For whatever reason..." Mr. Lehman drank a bit of water before continuing his speech.
"You seem like you live in a constant state of unease. Always on the run, always half in doubt. You have strong opinions about things but you never speak aloud. You carry a very heavy burden that you try to hide from others,"
"Am I wrong?" Seeing that she's having trouble answering him, he adds, "Listen. I don't know you that much and I'm only basing on my observations. But I can see clearly... that sometimes... you have to speak. Don't bottle up your thoughts and feelings."
Dani didn't speak for a while. It is unknown of what she's thinking.
"As a teacher, I can only do those things for you."
"What? Bullying me?"
"But you always talked back. You unrespectful brat! You're the only one who do that to me. And I only did those things because you're terrible to look at. You're a talented person and has a lot of potential. Don't waste yourself like that."
Dani tried to smile. She knows he's really being kind to her. 'But... What's good about being talented when you have a rotten core...'
Back then, she was certain that if he had said something like this, she would have been annoyed. And at the same time, fed up of him meddling with her like this. But now, she doesn't feel that way anymore. The eyes looking at her seemed warm.
'Isn't it because you finally cleared one of your doubts? That you're now at ease.
If it's the opposite, I wonder if you will still think of him like this...'
Dani ignored the unwanted voice creating chaos in her mind. "Then, I think you have to be nice to your students too."
Mr. Lehman raised his left eyebrow. She expected that he would scold her for being rude again but it didn't come.
"Hmm. Now that you, the troubled child is gone. I think my stress would greatly decrease."
They talked for several hours. It is mostly about her college plans and Mr. Lehman continued to give her advice. That college is the beginning of adulthood, and she must be serious and hardworking, among other things. She found it amusing because she was not really bothered about it.
Time flew fast. She also learned that one of the reasons why Mr. Lehman attended to her was because he once dreamed of going on stage to receive an award. It's just sad that he has no child to fulfill his dream like that. When they exited through the door, the teacher offered to drive her home but she politely declined. After a brief farewell, they turned their backs. After three steps, she immediately stopped in her tracks. She looked back and, with the people around, she called his name. "Mr. Lehman!!!"
The people's eyes were on her but she didn't mind. Even though there was a distance, she mouthed a word of thanks and bowed. She knew that he could understand that. She also saw how he laugh for a moment. That's how their short but strange relationship ended. And today, she feels heavy. It's because what she can only understand is her being miserable.
'Do other people also see me like that?'
She wondered about that. Everything he said hit her on the spot. But at the same time, she felt light. It's because someone understood a part of her. She went home with conflicting feelings.