Beautiful, unbelievably, just monstrously beautiful. I died. And I guess I died because of a botched surgery, because the last thing I remember was being prepped for surgery and having a tube placed in my face, through which the anesthetic was supposed to enter my body and put me to sleep.
Shit. I didn't even die from a truck or even save a little girl from getting hit by a car. I'm even now okay with a tractor. Or maybe because of an accident that God did and I should have been in front of him and he should have reborn me in another world with some cheat, but...
But now somehow, I ended up here. And how sorry I am that an all-powerful being who has lived longer than all of humanity put together didn't make a mistake and kill me, and even if that were true, I highly doubt that this being did anything to help me at all.
It was lazy to even remember my whole life because I had already gone over it more than a dozen times. In short, it was ordinary and nothing more. Perhaps you should pay attention to the fact that I was a doctor, but I think it is not particularly important, and I was not some kind of super doctor, to my regret, I had no talent for it, but there was a desire which was able to at least a little, but advance me. Still, it sounds pretty ironic that a doctor died on the operating table.
In that impenetrable darkness that enveloped my body affectionately and gave me a strange sense of calm. I do not know how long I was here, but the strange thing was that I did not feel a bit of panic, in my head, as well as in my thoughts was complete peace and not a drop of excitement. Even though I had no body, and I looked like a strange substance in a spherical form of white and I do not even know how I could see it without eyes.
The whole situation could have been called Ultimate Despair, if I hadn't been so suspiciously calm of course.
After some more time, which I could not determine due to the absence of any sign of its progress. But as it was, my whole being sensed that something was about to happen. I don't know what it was supposed to be, but I'm sure it was something important to me.
Suddenly, in front of where my eyes were supposed to be, appeared the first spot of color I had seen here, but not counting the black of course. It was an incredible distance from where I was, but even so its light affected me. It was a soothing blue light that went through my whole spherical body and gave me a strange sensation of warmth that enveloped my whole being and gave me a strange feeling I didn't know how to describe, but the only word to describe it and which could somehow fit it was "hope".
No not so "HOPE," which gave me the feeling that everything was going to be okay and that tomorrow could definitely come, and any problems I might ever encounter were nothing and could easily be broken.
I had never felt such a good feeling.
Finally, that blue light of hope began to approach me, blinding the things that were instead my eyes. Trying to close my eyes or cover myself with my hand, I realized that I couldn't do any of this because I didn't have any of it.
And the only thing I had to do was watch as this color began to approach my body at an incredible speed. As this blue light approached my body, I could make out that there was an object inside this light. And this, despite all the sensations this light gave me, made me feel tense.
At the very least it's weird and suspicious, but I don't think there's anything I can do about it anyway because I can't move or maybe I just couldn't figure out how to do it.
But that thing, or maybe it was some creature that looked like me, started coming closer and closer to me, but even still I couldn't tell what that light was coming from.
The only thing I had to do was to wait for the end of this event, with the same ultimate calm that I had had the whole time.
Faster than I could keep track, this light came as close as possible to me and struck me in the chest, then slowly began to merge with my body.
My whole being felt incredible pain. I could feel the foreign object inside my soul begin to enter and then merge with it. And I was sure that the entire space would burst into a monstrous scream, if I had a mouth or something like that. Even though my whole body was in pain, I didn't feel any anger or any desire to harm me from that pain.
On an intuitive level, I felt like everything that was happening right now had to be for my own good and this was my only chance to get out of this place.
As clichéd as it sounds, you could tell that my whole body was filled with the confidence that gave me the hope I'd felt before. I was confident that I had tomorrow ahead of me and that I had a future ahead of me.
Finally, I felt a strange light fuse with my body causing me to stop feeling pain, but because of all this moment I felt a waning tension causing my consciousness to start losing clarity, and I plunged into a benevolent darkness, which this time was not around me, but instead was emanating from my body. Well, or to make a long story short, I lost consciousness, or whatever you might call it in my condition.
The creature whose consciousness was slowly drifting into darkness could not see how his white sphere-shaped body began to change its color to a blue color, which was similar to that of the flying object a few moments before.
Nor could he see how his body began to slowly disappear from this black space, nor could he see how his already blue body began to merge with another body and because it was much stronger began to absorb it and take its place, which was in the belly of the woman who lay in the hospital room.