Kennedy
Vanilla. That's all I could think about the whole night. I didn't sleep a wink. Man, he smells amazing.
Last night I did a very bad thing, SUPER bad. I went into vampire territory and I saw him, standing there amongst the looming trees. Hell, I didn't just see him, I approached him, I SNIFFED him! I know it was extremely risky, any other vampire on patrol could've seen me and it would've been ugly. We're forbidden to step foot onto each other's properties without permission to do so. If we do, we could be imprisoned for trespassing and it could even be taken as a declaration of war.
But I just couldn't help myself.
Last night was a full moon, and as much as people would like to think that werewolves go insane when exposed to the beams of moonlight, it's not true. The full moon simply heightens our emotions and desires. It makes us impulsive, hence why I broke into vamp territory last night. I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel drawn to him, but of course I do. He's my mate. And I couldn't help myself, I just wanted to see him. It's like my wolf craved it. So thanks to the moon's persistent strength, I gave in.
This all terrifies me. I don't want to love him or care for him. It's so much easier to just hate him and be his enemy. Like yesterday when I bumped him, it felt like fireworks were erupting inside me at the simple touch. But the touch wasn't affectionate, it was malicious. I know that I can still touch him and be near him, purely to satisfy my 'mate' cravings. But I could do it in a way that wouldn't make me fall for him per se. I don't want to fall for him. I will never be with a man, especially if he's a vampire.
It hurts that I can't be with my one and only mate in the way that I've always dreamed, but I don't care. He'll ruin my reputation and my relationships with my friends and pack members. He's a disgusting vampire and I am not gay.
...
"Morning, Kenny," my dad greeted cheerfully as I sat down across from him at the table. I offered him a close-mouthed smile with a nod in response.
"I'm so sorry I didn't see you yesterday evening to ask you about your first day of school. I've been a bit busy." I waved him off.
"No worries, dad. I know how stressful it is to be the alpha of a powerful pack. And school was fine...for the most part." He raised his right eyebrow then shifted his gaze back to his newspaper. Our personal chef placed my breakfast in front of me to which I thanked her kindly.
A comfortable silence descended in the room. It gets awefully quiet with it just being the two of us. My older brother decided pack business wasn't for him, so he opted to study engineering at university. Killian was always a flower child with a brilliant brain. He's intelligent and curious and has a heart so big that the town of Forest Hill simply couldn't contain him. I miss him every day.
I cleared my throat, successfully breaking the silence. A pressing matter interrupted the airy thoughts of my lovely big brother. "Dad, can I ask you a question?" His green eyes met mine before he placed his newspaper down on the table. This was his way of saying 'yes' and that I had his full attention.
"What does it feel like...to lose your mate?" I was treading in dangerous waters by asking this. He looked taken aback but nevertheless, he cleared his throat. I knew it was a touchy subject.
"Um, well, it's painful, extremely so. In fact I don't think there's any other pain quite like it. It kind of feels like a stab to the heart and the emotional scarring stays with you for the rest of your life. It's a void that can never be filled by anything...or anyone."
A heavy silence filled the room before he spoke up again. He looked deeply into my eyes then continued. "That's why when you find your mate, you better hold onto her, son and you better love her and cherish her and protect her. Because once you've lost her, you will carry that pain for the rest of your life," he explained and you could tell by the emotion in his voice that he spoke from experience. I gulped. I'm fucked.
"But what if YOU reject THEM? Is that as painful as them dying or rejecting you?" I asked. I had to know.
"Well of course it's still going to be painful. The universe chooses your mate for a reason, and you're destined to love one another. Your heart will always hurt for not having that. But, since it would be your choice, it wouldn't be anywhere near as painful." He then eyed me suspiciously before he asked, "Why do you ask?" 'Shit. What do I say?' I was mentally panicking.
"Uh-Um it's just that I obviously haven't found my mate yet so I don't know what the universe has in store for me. I mean it could be anyone right?" I chuckled nervously and he laughed before nodding.
"I mean imagine what would happen if my mate was a boy?" The words came out before I knew I was saying them. My dad stopped laughing.
"Well of course they wouldn't be a boy. Don't be ridiculous, you're not gay," he said incredulously, a nervous chuckle accompanying his remark. He's right about one thing...
"Yeah, OF COURSE. But it could be worse than that! What if they're not even the same species?" He frowned deeply at my words.
"Well, that is uncommon, but a human mate wouldn't be a train smash-"
"But what if they're a vampire?" And suddenly everything went silent. You could cut the thick silence with a knife. My dad's eyes darkened and a look of digust settled onto his face. Curse my big mouth!
"No son of mine will EVER be with one of THEM," he whispered darkly. "Fucking vile creatures. If you find out that your mate is a vampire, even though the chances are basically minute, you stay away from them. You hear me? Stay away! You'll get over the pain, but they won't when I rip their limbs off. Stay clear of those wretched things." And with that he got up and stormed out. You could practically see the steam coming off of him. I knew I had struck a nerve mentioning vampires, but I just had to see how he'd react. It was kind of what I was expecting, maybe a little more intense though. But he's right. I should stay away from vampires. I SHOULD stay away from Demi.
Even though there's a part of me deep down that really doesn't want to.
...
Staying away from Dmitry was way harder than I anticipated it to be. Unfortunately for me, he's in almost every single class with me. Fucking perfect. Being around him felt like we were strong magnets, constantly pulling towards one another. I know I can physically stay away from him, but no matter what I'll always feel him near... and smell him. He smells heavenly.
Every once in a while, our eyes would lock and he'd glare and naturally I'd return it. I know he's my mate, but man does he drive me nuts. Just looking at him screwed with my brain. He's gorgeous, I can't deny it...and that scares me. Never in my life have I ever looked at another male and thought they were attractive. Well, to be fair, I'd never looked at girls that way either. Ever since I learnt about mates, I've been loyal to my future beloved. I never looked, only pretended to fawn over girls with my fellow dumbass hockey teammates. Putting on a façade is exhausting sometimes. It's funny how life works. I never thought the first person I truly find attractive would be a boy.
During English class, my eyes wandered to him from across the room. He was so focused on his novel that he didn't notice me looking. He had his delicate face resting on his right palm while he read. His cobalt-blue eyes moved slowly from side-to-side as they scanned over the words. Everything about him is just perfect, from his thick, but groomed, eyebrows to his porcelain skin to his silky obsidian hair that had a slight wave to it.
This boy is dangerous. I shouldn't be looking at him like this.
"-ennedy?" I felt a nudge on my shoulder.
"Kennedy!" I snapped out of my daze and turned to Romeo.
"Yeah?" I tried my best to sound alert and focused.
"Are you okay? You've been zoning out since yesterday." His voice sounded suspicious as he moved to try and see what I was looking at. His face lit up with surprise when he found Dmitry in my direct line of sight.
"The Russian vamp? Why were you staring at him?"
"Wh-What? No I wasn't! I just zoned out like you said. He just so happens to be right there." I lied right through my little werewolf teeth. He quirked an eyebrow.
"Hm, okay-" The school bell suddenly went off. I was literally saved my the bell, as they say.
"Well I gotta run. I've got Miss Anders for chem and you know how she gets when her students are late. See you after school!" And with that, Romeo was packed up and gone. I hurried to get all my shit packed up then rushed out before Demi. After my little observation earlier, I definitely need to stay away from him.
Thank God I had Geography next, literally the only period that Dmitry and I don't share. I needed at least one lesson to just focus and regroup my thoughts. I may come across as a dumb, asshole jock who doesn't give a fuck about school, but I care about my grades. And Demi's presence is really making it hard to focus on my work.
Curse the universe!
...
The end of school finally came after what felt like years of Geography. Exiting the school building, I found Romeo and Jude — another really good friend of mine — standing about near the school's parking lot. Romeo's hazel eyes lit up at the sight of me.
"There you are, we've been waiting! Ready to go bowling?" The best thing I could compare Romeo to is a puppy. His ADHD makes him really hyperactive and fidgety. This goes hand-in-hand with his bubbly personality. You can't help but feel happier when you talk to him.
"Yeah, totally. Let's-" but before I could finish my sentence, a thick stream of freezing cold water fell over my head, soaking my hair and my clothes.
"What, the, FUCK?" I turned around and found a certain smirking vampire who held an empty bucket in his hand, presumably from the janitor's closet.
"Yesterday you gave me a little shower to cool off, and I so appreciated it. I just thought I'd return the favour," he said innocently. By now everyone's attention was on us, a few gasps and whispers were heard.
"You fucking pathetic bitch!" Remember when I said my fatal flaw was my temper? Whenever I get super angry, my wolf comes out. On their own accord, my canines emerged and my hands found his collar. I yanked him close to me, earning more gasps from our little audience.
"What the fuck is your problem?" I yelled and he frowned darkly at me.
"Me? What the fuck is YOUR problem? Yesterday you trash-talk me, bump my shoulder then drive by and spray me with dirty water! Then today you avoid me like I'm a disease! You're a hypocrite!"
"Oh you're worse than a disease. You're a pest! You're a filthy-"
"Kennedy, stop!" I felt Romeo try and pull me away. My relentless grip never loosened, my eyes still locked on his. He looked angry.
"Kennedy, come on it's not worth it-"
"Yes it is! I'm not going to stand here after he just humiliated me!" Dmitry then held his hands over mine and squeezed...hard. I hate to admit it, but vampires are stronger than werewolves. He successfully loosened my grip before throwing my hands away like they were baseballs.
"You're such a fucking asshole, Kennedy. You got what you deserved today. You really are the stereotypical highschool golden boy who everyone loves but is realy an enraged di-" Before he could finish his sentence, I lunged at him, knocking him to the ground with a loud thud. I swung my arm, connecting my fist with his jaw. For a moment I saw terror in his eyes.
"Shut the fuck up! Do NOT act like you know me! You don't know anything about me!" I screamed and he flinched slightly beneath me. His blue eyes were wide. He was scared. I shut my eyes and tried to control my breathing.
"What the hell is going on here?" The voice of our principal boomed and Romeo swiftly pulled me to my feet. Star ran over and knelt down beside Demi, helping him up. A deep frown was settled onto Demi's features. An eggplant-purple bruise was settling onto his jaw, tainting his milky complexion. With his healing, it would be gone in less than thirty minutes.
Principal Ronan walked over, sighing audibly.
"Seriously, boys, it's the second day of school," he complained.
"Kennedy punched Dmitry, sir," Star informed.
"Because Dmitry provoked him!" Jude stepped in.
"Whatever! I will deal with this first thing in the morning when you," he pointed at me, "and you," he pointed at Dmitry, "see me in my office at seven AM. I don't tolerate fighting in this school. But for now, both of you just go home and cool off!" And with that, he left. Star sent me a glare.
"Stay in your fucking lane, Keller!" He seethed and Demi's eyes locked with mine.
"At least everyone has seen your true colours," the Russian muttered. I clenched my fist then stormed off to my car without a word. Getting in, I hit my steering wheel. I needed to calm down before I kill someone. Demi was right, the whole school witnessed how dangerous I can get when I'm angry. They're probably all afraid. I tried to even out my breathing; my chest heaved painfully.
I know I fucked up. I let my worst side get the better of me, I almost exposed the supernatural and worse, I inflicted physical pain on my mate. As much as he frustrates me, it still hurts that I hurt him and scared him.
When I eventually felt calm enough, I turned on my car, put it into first gear then drove home. It was a miracle that I didn't get into a car accident after how fast I drove.