"CLAUDINA!!"
It was no use. I was already teleported away.
I banged my fists on the ground. Why? Why didn't she escape with me?
Why? Why? Why? WHY?
What do you mean 'live for me'?
I am the one that should say that to you. I should have been the one that should be dead!
Not you, Claudina!
"AAAGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I screamed. I tore my half of my hair in fury. I beat my head on the ground. Why am I like this? You might as well say I am a murderer with the fake title of saintess.
I couldn't save her. I couldn't save her. I couldn't save her. I couldn't save her. I couldn't save her. I couldn't save her. I couldn't save her. I couldn't save her. I couldn't save her. I couldn't save her. I couldn't save her. I couldn't save her. I couldn't save her.
Why can't I save you? If only I could I save you…just you…then…
"Child, is that you?"
I slowly looked up.
A tall man dressed in white robes stood before me. A watch and a hourglass attached to a crystal chain was wrapped around his waist. Smooth ash grey hair flowed down to his feet. Two upward curved ash horns poked out from his head. He had a fair stern face more beautiful than any elves. A sliver infinity symbol was marked on his revealed forehead. His angled brows were creased and his grey eyes had worry written on them.
"L-lord Chronos?" I dare not ask if it is another demon. Another demon that will surely take away something valuable of mine.
He immediately knelt to the ground. He took my face between his hands. Cold like ice.
"Child, what has happened to you?" he asked worry laced in his words. "Why are you injured?"
It was Lord Chronos!
"Lo-lord Chronos, Claudina she…" I bawled. "She…" I couldn't bring the words without crying.
Claudina is dead…because of me.
"Claudina, she… Lord Chronos …she…" I hiccupped.
I screamed again. I tuned out whatever Lord Chronos was saying. Claudina's last words kept on repeating themselves in my head.
I squeezed my eyes. Claudina… I am sorry.
A jab hit my neck. I started to lose my conscious. Blinking I saw Lord Chronos calling for someone. Then it all went to black.
When I woke up I found myself on a soft bed. Gingerly I sat up before a sharp pain on my head caused me to wince. I blindly creased my head and found a bandage was wrapped around my head.
I don't remember being injured in the head…
I scanned the room I was in.
Arching on the four poster bed I was sitting on was a silky canopy. Soft plush pillows and fur were spread on the bed to resemble a cozy nest. Beside the bed was a dresser with a water jug and a goblet on top of it. Navy blue decorations on white walls and a glittering glass chandelier hung overhead on the dome shaped marble roof. Frescos of clouds surrounded the ceiling. The left side of the room had a wooden door curved in an elaborate flowery design. A bookshelf rested near the fireplace in the middle of the circular shaped room. On the mantle place was a gold candle holder, a lamp, various hourglasses and watches with curious chains attached and a crystal globe resting on a maroon colored cushion with gold tussles. A purple plush velvet sofa had a shawl resting on top of it was in front on the fireplace. Beside the sofa was a wooden side table with a piece of lace over it. A steaming tea and a open book showed the owner of the room just left. On the right side of the room were lace curtains which were drawn aside to show a glass door overlooking a serene garden. In the corner of the garden was a small cascade joining a steady stream. A stone path started at the edge of the door lead into the garden.
I also noticed my clothes' were changed to a knee length lace nightgown.
I remember meeting Lord Chronos after I was teleported and…Claudina…
Tears fell down on my hands.
The full impact of the events is finally coming to me. My comrades and the person I love were killed by the person who had always wanted the best for me and protected me, I fought a New Born demon and sealed it with that person, and then I asked that person to come back to Chronostis before they were killed by a King Grade demon.
Claudina's last words were to continue living for her.
But Claudina…how can I live…when the people that I live for…have all died because of me.
I clenched my fists on the duvet as tears streamed down my cheeks.
I did not even hear the door being opened and Lord Chronos entering.
"Child, why are you crying again?" Lord Chronos asked rushing to my side.
I glanced toward him but no words came out. Lord Chronos took my hand between his own hands and squeezed it.
"Child it is alright. Take your time and tell me."
I turned to fully look at him. His usually strict face was now replaced by a face of a smiling patient father. I gritted my teeth.
I was filled with more regret. Claudina was smiling in her last moments too.
I bent my back on Lord Chronos' hands.
"…Lord Chronos…the mission…I…" I stopped. I took a deep breath and straightened my back. I need to this right.
"Lord Chronos…the mission was successful with various failures."
A grim line stretched on his lips. He gave a small nod to continue.
"The casualties include the two hundred soldiers, the swords master and the unpledged Knight Syrus Corwell, the master of the mage tower Michel La Vlans, the Knight Commander Noelle Herfley, the duke of Arkrid Orion Arkrid, the enchantress and high priest of Nyxrif Melany and the crown prince Lucian De Crons."
His face was crestfallen.
"While I was forced to retreat, I was caught by our target Claudina before a New Born demon attacked both of us."
He frowned. "That's… unusual."
"Claudina and I…teamed up to seal the demon."
"I assumed she would have summoned it."
"Yes but she was just as surprised as me and demanded to know if I was the one who summoned it."
He signed lightly. "Truly unusual. Continue."
"After sealing, we…" I hesitated.
No more. I need to be honest from now on.
"I asked Claudina to come back to Chronostis."
Lord Chronos pressed my hand tightly due to surprise.
I swallowed before resuming. "She handed me the heads of some of the casualty members and somehow a King grade demon was summoned. She claimed she never summoned either of the demons."
"We weren't able to defeat the demon, so she…" Tears started to fall again "…She sacrificed herself so I could…get to safety. That's …all, sir"
The entire time I looked anywhere but Lord Chronos' eyes. Because I knew that he knew I only said the bare minimum of what had happened and left out various details and most importantly I asked a traitor who nearly killed everyone ten years ago to come back. In the eyes of the kingdom I am less than a criminal.
Death will be a merciful act towards me.
Lord Chronos was quite, his expression unreadable.
The air was suffocating. His cold hands were starting to become damp due to mine. Sweat formed over my temple and I felt light headed. I chewed the inside of my cheek, waiting for his response.
Is this how you feel when you disappoint someone you respect?
"I see. Rest some more for now." With that he left me alone in the room.
I collapsed on the bed. The disappointment in his voice…I would have preferred if he shouted or hit me. But Lord Chronos will never do that, no matter how angry he is. In his eyes we are only children needing guidance and therefore we shouldn't be rebuked for our mistakes rather learn from them. Though Claudina says that is just him being arrogant as Lord Chronos is a god.
Some minutes later a woman entered pushing a trolley laden with food and other things. The woman was dressed in black with a black veil covering her face and hair. I noticed even her shoes and gloves were black.
A widow working as a nun in the temple. Commoner widows usually come to the temple as a nun after their husband's death as remarriage is expensive for them.
She placed a stone basin on a table for me to wash in. She didn't talk to me as it wasn't allowed for anyone to talk to a widow working in the temple least they were lead astray.
I washed my face and my hands and by the time I was done wiping off, the woman had already left. She left the breakfast on top of a small table she had bought along with the basin and towels. On top of the table was a steaming breakfast of fried eggs, baked meat and potatoes, pumpkin porridge and freshly baked bread with a pot of jam while pitcher of lemonade had ice chunks floating inside.
Although delicious the food it was hard to chew. I barely tasted anything.
After the last bite I let the spoon clatter on the plate.
The moment I did so the door opened again.
The nun from before entered and started to clear away the dirty plates and basin. I had an irksome feeling that she had been right outside my door.
Strange…why did I find it irksome?
I squinted through the veil to make out her face though I could easily just command her to show me her face as the saintess. But I decided against it. No matter how evil of a saintess I may become, I shouldn't force a grieving woman to show her face. Also for some reason my Holy magic is not able to flow out from my body. I concentrated but it just wasn't coming out. I chalked it down as form of fatigue.
I fidgeted. But this woman's presence was nonetheless …murderous. Compared to the assassins that were after me and Claudina's own bloodlust it was something wilder. It's almost like the nun that first entered and the one now are both different.
Maybe they are…
I quietly watched from the bed as she placed the plates back on the trolley.
As she passed me to retrieve the towels her hand harshly yanked me towards her. I cried out in surprise. For a frail woman, she was quite strong.
She dug her fingers on my open palm. I tried to jerk her of me but that seemed to spur her to twist my arm. I opened my mouth to chat a spell but a gloved hand slapped my lips shut. She climbed the bed while still twisting my arm until she pinned my arm to my back. It stings. She pressed a knee on my back stop all my failed attempts to shake her off. I could master any non verbal spells because the moment I did so a sharp pain would throb on my heart. I glared at the woman above me. What sort of spell is she using?
I felt a hot breath on my ear. "Claudina should have lived, not you Ophelia."
Just as soon as she said those words she got down again and acted as if nothing happened. I shivered under the afternoon sun. Who was this woman? And why does she know about Claudina's death? Maybe she is from the faction that still supports Claudina or the faction that is against me being the next queen
But…isn't she right?
Claudina should have lived not me.
I killed Claudina again.
I didn't feel anything other than a little regret when I attacked her in the castle. But now…I feel hopeless.
Claudina said those parasitic butterflies won't let her die. However one of them entered the demon's mouth and instantly died. Doesn't this means she is truly dead?
The nun came up to me and yanked my hand again before shoving a folded paper in my hand. She placed a glass of water on the dresser. "Claudina has no need for your pathetic tears."
Just as she was closing the door she said in an undertone "Had you killed yourself before, Claudina would not have been dead today." She slammed the door.
Mindlessly I opened the paper. There was a small green vial with a metal stopper. I opened it and took a small whiff.
Poison. She is telling me to poison myself.
Tears dampened the paper.
Both Lucian and Claudina had been smiling at me in their last moments. They wouldn't want me to die. They loved me the point where they would kill themselves then see me get hurt.
What they don't know is they had been my reason for living. Should they die I would follow right behind them.
The people who thought of sacrificing their lives for me, I want their next live to be unburdened by me.
I re opened the stopper and titled my head back. The poison burned my throat but I no longer cared for any pain. When I stand before the world tree I would like it to reincarnate them and punish me in their steed.
I lay back down while creasing the vial. I felt rigidness forming on my joints and my fingers felt stiff. I closed my eyes.
Death is indeed merciful to those who need it. I grimly smiled.
Maybe I will go to hell instead of standing in front of the world tree. They don't deserve to see a sinner's face.
"Ophelia!"