It's 3 a.m. I have a half-emptied, hot cup of coffee by my bedside. It's not that hot anymore but I think I'm going to have it anyway. In fact, I think I'm going to have one more. I'm wide awake, thinking - in fact wondering about how doing what is right never goes out of style, isn't it? But the biggest problem of everyone's life is - nobody knows what is wrong and what is right. Do you believe it to be the toughest question? Or do we just enjoy making it so?
I don't know, because I don't think so.
When you learn a secret that changes your life, either it makes you rethink the past, or causes you to reimagine the future, anger at such betrayal is natural. The rage courses through your body, sanitising the pain over time and energising your efforts to adjust to the truth.
Anger is good for that, it burns brightly at first and glows in the aftermath like the embers in a dying fire. For some people, anger and love never go away, and for others, it veins over time. But, the emotion that I have found to be more difficult to experience and deal with is LOVE. I mean "LOVE" - the connection that brings a couple together in a relationship, so deep and powerful that betrayal holds a meaning. 'Oh god! This coffee got so cold; I guess I need to reheat now.' I thought to myself.
Coffee was just right on the stove along with everything which was continuously running in my mind. I poured the coffee in a mug and again started contemplating about how strangers or even casual friends can't betray us. They don't matter, right? It's the people we love, the people we trust, who have the power to break our heart.
"But we were loved." He whispered into her hair as she latched on to him tightly with her heart breaking down into millions of tiny pieces. He never wanted them to end.Wait! Let me rephrase that,"They never wanted to end."
But sometimes you don't always get what you want, right? No matter what you do, the control is never in your hands.The word 'control' is an illusion itself. It forces us to think that we are walking a path that we always wanted to trail along, only to lurk us in the darkness at the end.
He held on tight to her, pouring everything out in the tears that found their safe havens' in her shoulders. Once again those times, those memories… Oh, those memories. He remembers them all. The way their eyes twinkled, with the mere sight of each other's presence. The way their hearts beat together as if they had a mind of their own. The way their hands clasped together as if they were made for each other. He remembers it all. And by all, he also remembers how his one mistake made them stop. They stopped being what they once were, they stopped finding ways to each other's heart, they stopped seeing the part of each other's soul in their eyes and they stopped being the version of 'us' they knew.
Anaya is gone and will never be back. This is the harsh reality to accept.They will never share their love, their joys and sorrows together, anymore. She would never share a bed with him again.All that was left was a bundle of memories in front of him.To him, Anaya was everything, all the time.There's no one like her. Then how did they end up here? The same question spun in my mind over and over again with every sip of coffee.Well, now I'm all left with certain questions and an empty mug but still curious to know what has happened….
"He was the light to her darkness,
Looks like she got stuck in the dark again"