Snow's dark side had driven me to breaking point. However, the thought of killing Myrage is satisfying up until the point I've entered the black forest surrounding the black gothic castle nestled behind the dense thick foliage.
I've been guided by a raven, along the quickest path, as soon as my intentions became clear.
Snow had thankfully not followed me. Perhaps, he had scoffed at my attempt to run and didn't realise I had actually run away, rather than running back to the Castle retreat within the safety haven of the spell.
My arms are already bleeding from my sprinting just in case I had been followed, and when I stand at the steps to the Queen's castle I feel a strange calm enter my chest.
In this very moment upon arrival, I have no rage for her.
And no desire to kill her.
My thoughts, rather, turn to Snow's animalistic fire – insults, rough sex, rough handling, no kindness or limited care.
While it was tolerable for a short while, I had decided this life of being a door matt to a cursed man was not going to suffice. I had seen slithers of the real man, the real knight, the king… a handsome sir.
I was the breaker of this curse that stole his gentlemanliness.
His loss of love.
Snowred was a killer. To kill in order to save a killer would not balance out the magic that played out here.
A sacrifice might.
I was not going to kill the Queen to make a better man out of Snowred… no, it wouldn't work.
It was time for me to fulfil my real destiny.
I walk up with my hands raised, as I yell out for all to hear, "I have come to surrender!" I drop to my knees.
In that moment, as I kneel in the dirt, the front doors creak apart – and Myrage appears. She stands bathed in shadow and moonlight, with a black robe covering most of her skin, with the wolf fur on her shoulder. Her raven eyes narrow, and her feline claws extend.
Myrage lifts one hand, the claws slicing together under the moon in an ushering gesture to come closer, "Welcome back, Ellie," she speaks rather cheerfully, "I just finished making some cookies – come, come, they're all for you."
I'm escorted back to her dining table, which is always empty in a morbidly dank, wet room. While she takes her seat at one end, I take my seat at the other. Only one crappy candle near death provides light between us.
Indeed, however, fresh chocolate cookies are still smoking from the middle. They look delicious, but I refrain from eating them less they're poisoned.
"Speak to me," Myrage drinks from a goblet full of rabbit's blood, while a crow perches on her shoulder, "Why are you surrendering now, Ellie?"
"To bargain – as you grant wishes," I murmur, "I think you'll like what I have to say."
"Then speak your mind, girl, I am listening," Myrage lowers her goblet, rather polite, until she tilts her head and freezes in that posture. I try not to feel strange from her intense stare.
"You may have my face and kill me if you so please. I only wish you to give Snow his mortality back. His kingdom. His knights. And he will lust for you with my face," I gulp, as this was it, this was how I could save him.
"Oh, well, you come so generous, that you'd sacrifice your life… for his? You don't want to live at all?"
"What is the point if I am soon to be abused by the monster that resides within a good man. It's not good enough for me. I don't want Snowred," I murmur my truth, "I want Snow."
"Let me consider your offer… hmmm… you want Snow to have mortality rather than immortality, restored reign over Alma… and his best friends? In exchange for your face? I will require two more things from you. As you have requested three large things," the Queen tut-tuts her disapproval, but then she waits for me to bargain further.
I had to think it through.
"…may I ask why you have so many animals attached to you, your highness…?" I whisper, hoping to find an answer.
"I cannot live without replacing my aging body parts, I am only immortal through dirty bloodied magic," Myrage smiles, "Aren't I beautiful though?"
I just nod swiftly, pursing my lips… I witness the fury in her gaze as she reads my lie, so I add, "As I am dying tonight. You can have my face and my body too. I'll be dead anyway. Just give Snow back what is rightfully his, please."
"Hmmm," the Queen smiles, "That's two things. One. More. Thing."
"I do not know what else to give," I admit my fault.
"Snow doesn't desire my temper – he desires your submissive nature. I suggest we shall share your body and you shall live – burdened by me," Oh… I had been resigned to my absolute death, to fulfil breaking the curse, to bring a happy future to the Kingdom of Alma. One sacrifice, me, for the happiness of many thousands more. But to live burdened… what would become of me then? Myrage answers my confused and startled thoughts, after letting the idea simmer for a torturous minute, "We will be like sisters, Ellie, sharing the same body. I can experience his love and you can harness my power."
"Will I hear your thoughts? Will you control my body, my will?" I ask, gulping.
"No, child, I will be in your vessel, experiencing your journey from the back of your mind – the journey I've always lusted for. Your expense will be the burden of my dirty bloodied magic. You'll be tied to the death of the one I killed to obtain that power. Whittaker… he'll haunt your mind… always… he is Snow's bastard brother, born of King and Witch. Born a warlock, I slit his throat in a ritual to steal his destiny years ago. He wasn't happy about that, Ellie. He makes me miserable on a daily basis. I am exhausted. I am an old lady now. I need respite," the Queen sighs, naturally, as if she really is tired and being honest about it.
Hmmm. But, there was one thing that certainly caught my attention.
"Did you say Snow has a bastard brother? And he haunts you? How do I deal with him? Whittaker?"
"You soothe the man, however you can," Myrage snaps, and if I didn't know any better, the howling wind in the corridors seemed to be laughing at her as multiple doors slam shut and end up rattling the old table.
"How do I soothe Whittaker?" I murmur, "If he is already dead?"
"How do you soothe an angry ghost stuck in limbo, Ellie?" the Queen shakes her head at me, "A very passionate warlock, at that, killed before he could have a chance at challenging the royal family? To challenge Snow? He prepared his whole life for that moment and I stole it from him… so he haunts me… be prepared to soothe that… in anyway you can…" Myrage clacks her claws fast on the wood, chipping away, as if she is truly nervous speaking of Whittaker.
"What if I avoid soothing him, what will happen if I ignore him?" I ask.
"You cannot avoid it – haunting is not something you can escape."
"But if he is Snow's brother, he may like me a little better than you," I know it is risky to say that, but Myrage just smiles backwards – so I guess it's a deep seated frown.
"Do we have a deal or not, Ellie?" she whispers, husky, almost as if she is in pain.
"You will live inside me – and give Snow back his kingdom, his mortality and his pack as knights – all mortal as well? No curse. No burden for any of them."
"You will be the only one burdened. While I enjoy the show," Myrage starts to chuckle, "Now – we only have to do one more thing to complete this bloody exchange."
"You will have to cut out my heart?" I whisper, truly terrified.
I had a feeling this whole thing would end in my heart being torn from my chest.
Surprisingly, Myrage shakes her head, "No, no, child," she points to her chest, "I will cut out mine – and you will have to eat it while it still beats."
Oh – oh, no.
No, no, no.
"If I can not?!" I blurt in a panic, as Myrage picks up a dagger from the table.
"Try to wash it down with the cookies," the Queen smiles, "Oh… I forgot to add… for three things you will sleep for three years," it's already too late, almost as if she knew I would come back to sacrifice myself to her like this.
It has all been prepared for this moment.
Before I can think another second, my whole destiny changes, as she carves out a butchered hole in her chest, reaching in to crack open her ribs, before ripping her heart out in one clawed hand.
Myrage gurgles up black blood as she lays it on the table… slouching forward, the black and very small withered muscle beats as the black sludge oozes out of it, past her hand and fingers, toward the chocolate cookies.
The beat of the heart starts to slow.
I don't have time to reconsider.
I stand up in a panic as I see the future of the Kingdom flash before my very eyes.
I'm going to save everyone.
Snow, his Kingdom – everyone!
I lean across the table, and I pick up the tiny heart in my left hand, and a cookie in my right.
As I dare to glance down at the disgusting thing, I almost panic and drop the heart. My fingers squeeze it tight, then closing my eyes, I bring my hand up and I shove the muscle in my mouth – swallowing it in one go. I choke as it slithers down, and I shove the chocolate cookie in my mouth second, chewing desperately, trying to get the black bloody taste off my tongue.
As the Queen's heart hits my stomach – I feel my soul rush out of me.
I fall into the coma she's promised.
And I don't awaken for three years.