It is sad not to love,
But it is much sadder not to be able to love.
—Miguel de Unamuno
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"My father was a great man. A loving and caring father who tried to do everything for his family even though we were poor. He and my mother used to tell us stories when we were young, but after his death, the habit stopped." she began and imagined those days vividly in her head.
"When did he die?" he asked.
"I was thirteen when he died. The doctors had said that the cause of his death was natural but stress had played a major role in weakening his health. We didn't take care of him enough." she voiced out her thoughts that nobody had heard before. Eva felt comfortable telling him. He was not quite a stranger and perhaps, he would understand.
It felt as if she was taking her burden off her shoulders and shifting it onto him. Her heart was already feeling lighter as she released all her thoughts and opinions in front of him without any hesitation.
"You can't stop death from arriving. There was nothing you could've done. And I'm certain that you helped more than anyone did." he said.
Eva nodded, unsure whether he was right or not. Her father's death had affected her deeply placing a barrier in between her mother and sister. They weren't like how they were when young. Innocence had been stolen at an early age when they had to go outside to help their mother earn some money to manage the house expenses.
"I'm here now. Even if you have ideas about killing me, you can always tell me." Eva looked up at him and her lips twitched. He was looking serious but she didn't miss the flash of amusement in his eyes as he saw her smile at his words.
"I don't think I could ever kill someone," she spoke, her voice soft and lower than a whisper.
"Didn't you want to hurt that man after what he did to you?" asked Theo and saw how her eyes glimmered again with that angry look.
"I never said that he didn't deserve punishment. After all the things he did, he earned the right to be hurt, but killing is taking it too far."
Again, he studied her, quiet for a moment. "You have no desire to understand what it's like to have power?"
Eva frowned. "Why would I want power?" she asked.
Theo shrugged, intertwining their hands together and caressing her fingers one by one. "To defend yourself from harm, to help the world from monsters like me. I know you want to get stronger to be able to assist your family."
"What makes you think you're a monster?" she asked, confused on why he would term himself like that. Even if he was a monster, did it make a difference to his other good qualities?
Theo gazed at her before he replied, "When you have killed thousands of people without shedding a tear, you start accepting the fact that you are a demon in a human's form."
Eva's frown remained in its place, as she sat there thinking hard about what he told her. He was so hard to understand! It was like a mixture of colors.
Black in the majority but with a hint of red, and a mix of blue and green. His actions were often opposite to what he spoke. She didn't know what to believe anymore.
"Do you want to sleep?" he asked and Eva unconsciously nodded, feeling her eyelids get heavier with each passing second. If this continued, she would be leaning in face first into his chest and that was the last thing she wanted to embarrass herself with.
Eva watched as he got up and made space for her near the pillows. Leaning back, her head hit the soft pillow lightly and she tried her best not to close her eyes and fall asleep.
Theo didn't depart to his couch immediately. Bending down, his lips touched her cheek and Eva sighed feeling a wave of loneliness vanish when he had stood up a second ago. The kiss lasted for a few seconds before he straightened up and looked at her.
"Sleep, I'll be right here." and that was all the assurance she wanted to shut her eyelids off and fall into a heavy slumber with him in the same room.
This time, she had no fear of his proximity. Only a bit of nervousness which she tried her best to push away.
—
The next morning when she woke up, Eva was dumbfounded by the sight in front of her. She rubbed her eyes to be sure that she wasn't still dreaming or stuck in an illusion.
The King was lying on the couch, his arm under his head as a pillow as he slept with a peaceful look on his face that sent goosebumps through her arms. Slowly getting up, she tried her best to be as soft as possible to not wake him up.
Crouching down to her knees, she observed his features closely than any other time. His hair looked as if it had grown since she had seen him tying it in a ponytail at the back of his head. He looked divine as he continued to sleep, his chest moving indicating that he was breathing and alive. It took a minute for Eva to realize that she was creepily staring at him without his permission.
Feeling the blush return to her face, she hastily got up to her feet and headed straight for the bathroom. What she needed was a cold bath so that she could get back to her senses which seemed to have disappeared when he was around.
Just as the bathroom door closed gently, Theo's eyes flashed open, a smile tugging at his lips as he imagined her staring at him with that wild look in her eyes.
Birdie could be sneaky too... something they both had in common.