"Taylor, I would never and could never hate you. I love you." he let out a sigh before sitting us on my bed. I rested my head on his shoulder.
"I really am sorry Dad." I told him again, I cringed at myself. I sounded like a broken record. "Taylor, listen to me, I won't mince words with you. I am disappointed, just like I was disappointed when you returned home the second time without completing the challenge." I cringed again.
"But I don't hate you, I could never. I've been avoiding you because I needed to put myself together, also because i was busy. Sweetheart, failing isn't the end of the world, it's what we do afterwards. You're not the only one to fail those trails, other wolves—"
"I'm a failure Dad, I've failed three times. Other wolves aren't me, they aren't future betas, they're not your daughter, they're not embarrassments to their packs."
"Taylor!" He'd raised his voice, Dad normally had no need too. He wasn't the type to yell, he got his point across differently.
"You aren't an embarrassment to me or this pack. You are young and you will learn, just as we all do. Where you will become an embarrassment is if you say and think things like this. No one in our family thinks you're a failure. This is just a rough patch."
I kept silent, there were people who thought of me as failures, even within this family, but he didn't need to know that.
"I came to see you sweetheart because I was worried, I know you're having a hard time. But apart from that, I came here to tell you something important." he took a deep breath, I braced myself for the worst.
"Alpha Ronan and I, your mother too have decided that you are going to go through retraining. By that I mean that you'll be taught the basics all over again, absolutely everything. I won't lie, your skill set is noticeably weak, having beta blood can only get you so far. You need to learn to take care of yourself, for this pack and for your little sister. Until then jenna will be handling things."
I was shocked. Retrained? That was a very light punishment compared to what I had imagined, I was right about the last part, Jenna would take my place in this pack, dad thought it would be temporary, but I knew she planned on making it permanent. Would dad believe me if I told him about Jenna? He would listen, I was sure, but then what? It was decided that she would replace me until after the next trails. If I could succeed then, I would return to my duties. I had a year till the next one, I would try my hardest.
"Are you alright?" He asked worriedly
I looked at him, really looked at him. He was infamous, intelligent, intimidating. But he was my Dad and I would do anything for him.
"I am, I understand that this is a way for me to win the trust of the pack." I said, and yours too. I thought to myself.
He cleared his throat, "Exactly, I know your pride might get in the way, you are my daughter after all." He let out a loud laugh before continuing, "But humble yourself, never mind what others say, you know what you're working for." I nodded my head. I didn't have much pride after my poor performances over the years. Not to mention, I know I'm not exactly the most liked around here, maybe once, but now...
He smiled at me, "You'll start next week, for now, get out of this room. You'll soon turn into a bat or a cave man or something, just look at your hair."
His words were so unexpected that I let out a surprised laugh.
"Ha! She smiles. But I'm serious, put a brush through that hair of yours, then you rejoin society."
He got up to leave, when he reached the door, he gave me another smile.
"I love you, you'll make a wonderful beta one day, All this will just be a story one day sweetheart, it won't even make you sad anymore one day, just a story, left in the past."
He suddenly got a faraway look in his eyes, and a dark look on his face. Did anything happen? Or was he rethinking everything he'd just did? I mean maybe he or Alpha Ronan had realized it was too light of a punishment to be given for past failures.
"Dad, is there anything wrong?" I asked
"Nothing honey, just..."
Here it comes, my real punishment.
"Just reminiscing. Just know one thing Taylor, when you're out there, remember that ruthlessness can sometimes be the only way to survive and if you survive then that's all that matters."
With that he left my room.