Natsu ran the water in the bath as he carefully helped Lucy into the bath. Shortly after he got undressed too as he joined her in the bath.
He sat behind her as he hugged her with only silence filling the bathroom as he washed Lucy's body gently. After they both where done he tied a towel around him as he got Lucy out to help her change into some comfortable pajamas she had and escorted her to her bed as she layed facing the window where the sun had begun to go down.
Natsu didn't have anything to wear to sleep so he only put on his white baggy pants he had that day and tight underwear he regretted wearing. He was still in his month of rut so he just decided he would just have to force himself to sleep early as he saw the sun disappear slowly from the sky. He jumped into bed behind her as he wrapped his arms around her and placed a pillow in between his legs to prevent himself from poking her later on..
Natsu closed his eyes now as he saw the last of the suns light and faded into the darkness of his sleep…
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Lucy couldn't sleep..
She didn't feel tired at all as she watched the night begin to shimmer in stars.
She thought to herself
'What happens now? Where do we go with this?'
As she grew tired of staring at the sky she turned in natsu's arms as she faced him now. She noticed how he had furrowed his brows as he slept, he was probably having a nightmare. She wouldn't blame him as today was a nightmare for both of them.
As she kept watching him, she thought about there future, present, and past..
'Would I have more children with natsu?'
'How would they act together after what had happened?'
Were they always this close back in the days?'
Lucy finally giggled as she thought of that one time she had woken up in her bed to turn around and see natsu's and happys faces as they slept peacefully in her bed.
"Oh mavis… how did I ever get stuck with you.."
*lucy finally spoke again after their argument in the restroom as she heard natsu wince and hum in his sleep*
Natsu grabbed her in a tighter hug now in his sleep as he tried hugging her with his legs but the pillow prevented him. Lucy sighed as she removed the pillow from in between them not thinking anything of it as she snuggled closer into natsu's chest and underneath his chin. Finally lucy decided to worry about the future for later… right now she was in the arms of the man who loved her the most. She would put all her pain and grief for him, she felt a sense of stability now as she came to accept that yes she had found out she was pregnant with there child today but at the same time lost their child. She was being selfish in not being there for natsu when he was trying to get her to open up…
*lucy leaned in closer into him as she can hear his soft pants and rise in body temperature, she hugged his shirtless chest as she cried tears of happiness, sadness, joy, and love… she really loved him so much.*
Suddenly lucy felt him flinch into her as she felt his hips thrust themselves into her legs. She realized what the pillow was for now as she felt him hard pressed into her. She didn't know what to say or do as her small amount of grief turned into lust. She began snaking her hand down twords his pants as she felt him twitch underneath her touch. She had begun to pant as well as she felt her heart rate increase. In a quick swipe she felt her wrist get harshly gripped as she looked up to see a flushed natsu who looked at her with his yellow demon eyes and demon appearance above her now.
"Luce.. don't do this to me.. not today… I'm serious.."
*natsu wasn't angry but instead in a lust fevered zone where he tried with every ounce of his body to not take her by force now.*
"… let's do it natsu.."
*lucy dared him as she used her other hand to fumble with his pants loose as he groaned and placed his head above her shoulder.*
"Lucy… this.. is wrong…. I'm not okay right now… and your.."
*natsu was caught off as lucy kissed him to shut him up, she didn't want to hear what had happened to her from his lips tonight… she just needed his warmth..*
".. *pant pant pant* luce….*pant pant pant* stop.. *pant pant pant* pleas…"
*natsu was fighting heaven and hell at the same time as he squeezed his every ounce of self control as he could as he felt lucy kept nipping at his lips, neck, chest, and arms. She had also managed to pull out his length from his pants with one hand as she tried undressing her bottom half now as she finally grew the wits to pin both of her wrist now above her head.*
"LUCY! … *pant pant pant* STOP. *pant pant pant* THIS. *pant pant pant* "
*natsu steadied his breath as lucy layed still as she looked at him..*
"Lucy… let's wait… let's build some time to heal first… you have been taking advantage of me when I'm at my worst and I let you do as you wish for my shameless lust… let's take a break on the sex "
*natsu finally proclaimed as he let her go slowly and got out of bed to fix himself back into his pants and sit on the floor now.*
"Is it because, I'm not good enough anymore?"
*lucy played dirty now as she threw natsu a toxic comment that would have riled him up to do anything she wanted.*
"No luce… it's not because of that… I think we both need time to heal and learn lucy… I still love you but right now I can't have sex with you with this state of mind."
*natsu told her honestly as he recalled Nashi and Liddan where both incidents where he lost control because of Lucy's advances even after he told her to stop… this was becoming a pattern in their relationship and he didn't want this to turn into a poison.*
"But… your in rut natsu… and I need you.."
*lucy protested as she was still in bed and looked over at him who only sat by the wall with his legs crossed and arms crossed still in his demon appearance.*
"Exactly lucy… I'm in rut… we agreed I would stay away from you to not cause any harm to you or do anything to you… but lucy… don't you see? Your taking advantage of my weakness for your selfish needs… lucy I love you, but you need to have my consent instead of manipulating me and taking advantage.."
*natsu finally stated the problem as lucy got the message, she climbed out of bed as she sat on the floor now in the dark as she talked to natsu.*
"…natsu… how long have I been doing this to you?.."
*lucy afraid now of what his answer would be she tried to hold her breath but only gasp as he responded back to her.*
".. ever since we conceived nashi…"
*natsu confessed as he remembered that night he was about to apply protection to himself but lucy had snapped the condom away from him and told him that tonight she was 'his'. He still wanted to wear protection but never got the chance as lucy didn't let him apply it and just took advantage of him that night. Sure natsu still enjoyed it but a little voice in his head had begun telling him that 'no this is wrong' whenever he would start having sex with her in places he didn't want to or would tell her to wait a bit longer.*
"Natsu… I'm so sorry.."
*lucy tried touching natsu to show him her scencerity but only pulled her hand back as she began to double think her actions.*
Natsu saw this as he grabbed her hand back and placed it on his chest, he shuddered as the contact on his skin wasn't helping him in his rut but would suppress it for her just to make sure he wouldn't scare her off him.
"Lucy, this is still okay… I love when you hug me from behind or simple pats on my chest and your warm lips in mine… but I need you to promise something to me.. "
*natsu began his speech as he got lucy to nod and agreed to the promise before hearing it.*
"Promise me, that when I tell you 'no' or 'stop' you will stop… promise it to me on behalf of your celestial keys.."
A tense situation built in the atmosphere of her bedroom as she sighed and agreed and promised on the behalf of her celestial keys.
"I promise natsu, I promise as a celestial mage that I will earn your consent from now on.."
*lucy felt a strong connection form as natsu sighed in relief and hugged her.*
"Thanks lucy… and I'm sorry about today.."
*natsu was happy now getting that problem off his chest but also felt bad he couldn't help her with what happened today.*
"It's okay natsu, I'm recovering now… and .. your right natsu… let's take a break… let's learn how to heal together.."
*lucy gave him a small smile as he saw how beautiful his wife had gotten even after having two kids.*
"Yes… let's heal together.."
They both rested together on the floor as the cold air came through the night sky into Lucy's room as they both fell asleep.