After the luncheon Joan asked me to come with her on their ranch just a couple of minute drive from their mansion. She wanted to talk to me about herself and her past. It's not because she wanted to pry but just to try her best to remember everything, even if only of the best or happy part of her life meeting me and having her daughter, that's all. Joan said that she doesn't want to miss an opportunity where she can make it up to her daughter and love her and me the way I needed or deserved to be loved. And that struck me more inside that she wanted to make up for the lost times, thus, here I am trying my best to hide the things I did to protect her for being hurt and all. My God!, this woman is amazing!
Liillian will pick me up on Monday since we needed to head to London anyway for a conference. I still didn't know how to tell her about finding her lost mom, at long last. I am less worried about that part. But I'm more concerned about what I will tell Joan when she asks about her past. Will I lie or just tell her everything? But telling her everything would ruin her life now. She doesn't remember her past maybe it's a blessing that she cracked her head and forgot about her heartbreaking memories, which includes the times when I hurt her and lied to her. I don't want her to remember me as a monster or a womanizer. I want her to have a beautiful memory of me and like a dream I am always her princes charming, saving her from dangers and people who tried to hurt her. How I wish all of it were true, maybe it won't hurt as much as telling the whole truth and make her unhappy. I don't know but I need to be wise about this.
I couldn't sleep just thinking about it and Joan or Leila. So I got up from bed and went downstairs to the garden. Wow! It is so peaceful and wonderful here!, I was about to get a heart attack when Joan whispered my name like she wanted to hide from someone or something! Jes...!, Leila....ah Joan, what the f*ck are you doing there, this late?
Haha....haha!, you're funny! I just wanted to smell my flowers and the breeze before I o to sleep. Everyone is already asleep so I'm whispering so they won't wake up, hihi!, Joan said giggling. Then she pointed to go on the other side of the garden since she wanted to show me something. I followed her and said that I want to go a back and sleep. But she insisted and said that I would love the view more there. OMG! She's right, there's a small river with running water below the garden. We walked down stone stairs and under there, a small body of water adjacent to the beach, that flows freely and rapidly like a little falls down to a river streaming to somewhere. Joan went down the river and took off her clothes. I called for her and asked her to stop doing what she's doing but she hesitated and as if she didn't hear me at all. I took off my sleeping gown and now on my tank top and panty. Joan isn't wearing anything which I just found out when the moon struck its light on her while she's swimming in in the flowing river. I tried to touch the river floor and yup it's not that deep and I can be assured that I won't drown here. I know how to swim but not much on deep waters. So, I swam to reach her. But Joan suddenly disappeared and I tried to look for her and couldn't find her. I felt scared and then...
Got yah! You thought I would leave you, huh. I won't, we're friends forever and ....maybe more! Joan said appearing behind me and slowly grabbled me on the waist and slid her hand to touch my private, but I took her hand off, then turned around. Before I could complain with the way she acted, she already placed her mouth on mine kissing it hungrily. Joan, st....stop....Peter is very kind and a good man, you love him. You don't want to do this!, I said pushing her away from me, her lips still trying to reach for mine like she doesn't want to let go of me. I want you Marissa, from the moment I saw you at the party. Please, don't make this hard for me. I think I love you and that's what I feel every time I'm near you like I've always loved you. And it felt right when we kiss and maybe if we make love we'll know for sure, right?, Joan added moving closer to me and touched my back and waist. She then took my hand and placed it on her breast then made me squeeze her bosom again and again.