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Chapter 2 - my childhood

Now neither have any hope nor necessity of good thing except god. Despite of that afformentied incident. What I think of the past today is nothing special except bitter memories so meet me this is me Sara shah .now I am 32 years old. My life was not so easy from childhood plethora of problems neither make both ends meet , toys for playing and nor new cloths for Eid. Despite quagmire of problems I was very happy with my family. There are 7 members in my family .I have parents ,3 brothers , one sis and granny (babey). My villagers called her B-Aman. Everybody respect her she was Nobel woman who sacrificed her whole life for nourishment of their nephews and nieces.

After death of her 5 brother and two nephews those were died from TB she took responsibility to nourishment of their descendent . After death Three brother wives got marriage on another place and children left behind at home one brother have no children and other brother have not married and nephews are young when they died her father died many years ago . Two women's took care 9 children 7 girls and 2 boys.

She (baybay) was aunt of my parents. She remained virgin never got marriage for orphan kid's nourishment. She did look after treatment children disease with herbs and reciting verse

Not only she treatments with herbs and Exorcise/baptize/conjuring water and oil (Expel through adjuration or prayers) for healing but offer lunch to patients those come from remote areas also. If ever some wayfarer had come to village she would have offer hospitality to them and also she was famous for honesty people's gold and money got kept here for protection.

When My grandmother got married and after wedding she requested to her new husband I want to bring my children here he accepted her request this man has already 3 children from ex wife.when she shifted her children in new home her mother in law first serve ex wife children later served to her children. Her mother in law served her children i.e my (father, uncle and aunt) oats and remnant food bread which they can't eat and digest due this inequity children raised voice and complaint received to bay by she took action and rashly reached to children and pic children in basket and drop to parent home in this regard she hired a person on rent for carrying the children because there was mountain area children can't walk smoothly. Anyway children shifted to home.

My grandmother give birth 3 children on new home and she baybay got admition my father and uncle into school because they had to take care home and assets and wood well but did not admitted girls into school and nor get food well girls life was not so easy because she were conduct enteral and external domestic works like as in morning bring water from natural spring, drawing water from well and goes junle for geting some wood for cooking food on oven and stove.

And Winnoing the wheat and corn cob.

when coming back to home scorching sun light become very hot and my mother has not any shoes to wearing then her bear foot start burning and she keep her foot on stone for getting some relax,she got throne her hands and foot during collecting wood resultantly blood come out from skin she round some clothes.my one mother friend has one pair of shoes some time she offer her and help her in works. In night girls makeing embroidery work in the light of ( laltain) so that earn some money.as well as women making rope from jute plant for knitting wood bed (charapi) and chairs.

Mother disclosed walking on hot way. Children in night reading in laltain light.

Jute plant wet process in this regard branches reserved for one month into to water to make soft and extract some rope fiber from its branches. Later bags are knitted.

When those orphan (kids) grew up and young granny got done their marriages .my father and mother are first cousin who grownup together. Other cousin married another relatives. After my father grandma death my parents and granny left alone in this world and they live together. When my mother get pregnant my father took her to meet with my grandmother after climbing the mountain and uphill ways due to my mother got abortion of 4 months at the end on this sad occasion my grandmother uttered with abhor her rubbish (aboarshen) threw into cow dung. She did not make sympathy with her. "Time passes, sayings endure"

In 1980 my father moved to metropolitan city Karachi. he started work in hospital and he had come back home after 4/5 years. When he came back home our relative Enraged against my mother.my father had Doubt on my mother. When my elder sister and brother had borne then my mother said I have need nothing except children protection. Our relatives ill advised to mother that you got divorced my mother reply her if I got divorced my descendant will ruined their life i don't want that my children work under supervision of my relatives or my husband brother wife's. She has been borne the brunt for children later she give birth to 3 more children one has died during construction work of my uncle later I sara was born.

Before marriage aba (my father) loved ami (my mother) but he started hate her and still because her suspecting nature.my mother was so beautiful and she did all of work herself my father gave some money after some time to her.

When my father got lot of money he used to smoking and he adopted poor and helpless family for nourishment but that family began to interfered our family matters I can said they become our new lord. Because they had patronage of our father. Our new lord started decision making of our home.

Father still paying money to step siblings and take care even he provided big chunk in property. Whereas they are not deserve by law.

In 1996 When I was 5 year old my mother was too sick. She doesn't move my elder sister came from Karachi. My elder brother and sister live in Karachi with my father. My sis have gone for studies because in our village have not any high school college after primary. My grandmother don't like girls education. But babey wants my sister get education because my sister love to studies. Our relatives were against my sister education. But babey support her. And my elder brother join police after their intermediate.

My sister, marriage was about to ready my brother in law was doing job in Pak air forces they love each other. One month before marriage in our village came flood and our some chunk of house to flow into flood. We had to repaired and renovated home for her marriage. Wedding function was too good peoples remember long time my sister was very happy because brother in law allow my sister for higher studies.

after one month of marriage my sister came home to attending her best friend marriage at evening suddenly my younger 10 years old brother appeared into room from playground where my sister, her two friends and two brother gathered and he took gun and stated acting of shooting like dramas and said you know in drama's actors do like this my sister and her two friends laying on bed eating fruits apple my sister standup and shout plz don't do this my brother said its empty she said The devil make shoots. He push the trigger and aim on her resultantly fire opened she got bullet injury and she embraced martyred( shadat) on the spot after she rushly shifted to hospital but doctor confirm her death. Our laughing house became a place of mourning because" A good man dies early"

Our relatives got benefit of this incident opportunity after this incident relatives provoke against my mother. they had want my father offer divorce to my mother and takeover at our home property. meantime my granny admitted in hospital for eyes operation. she don't know about incident of sad demise of baji (my sis). After the fight between mother and father, because Relatives told Abba that your wife is not taking back the dowry because she wants to marry your youngest daughter 5 year old with your son in law. Aunt my uncle wife Speaking to my sister's in-laws, this dowry don't bring back because they want to keep your gold. "Adversity is the best judge of a friend and a foe"

It is culture in our society that dowry is provided to bride for home making ad running daily routine life. And gold item, shoes, clothes dresses and makeup are provided by groom this called (Bari) That stuff is provided by bride called (jehaz)dowry and which is provided by groom is called bari.

One day after my sister death My father and mother started quarrel with each other and ordered me that take decision whether you will stay with father at city(Karachi) or stay with mother at village. But father forcibly took me city.