It was exactly three months and three weeks since Mark had left for his surgery. I didn't want to bother our families about my discovery. As far as they knew, we were the perfect match.
We grew up together, and even though he was more like a brother to me, he was the one who first proclaimed his love for me, which made me think about it until I began to see him differently.
Everyone had warned us that we would never find someone who loved us as much as we loved one other. Everyone was right, at least on my part.
I got convinced he meant every word he said to me. He made me feel special and adored at all times. We were dubbed "Fairy Tale" by some.
We were all we could think about, so we married right after I graduated from university.
Everyone assumed he had knocked me up because of our hasty decision. My parents would worry now and again, trying to warn us about how soon we'd be moving and all the difficulties in marriages we weren't ready for, but we never cared, and I never cared. His father and aunt, too, were unconcerned.
I was head over heels in love, and all I could think about was him and me. I've never looked back on my decision to say yes to him.
But the images of my cousin and Mark holding hands while walking, eating together at a restaurant, staring at each other as if they admired no one else but themselves, hugging and smiling made me want to murder them both.
My husband had traveled, and coincidentally, my cousin was also out of town for a business presentation. I couldn't even have the luxury to defend him to myself.
While I waited for him to return from his purported journey, the anxiety I had felt before he left vanished and got replaced by hatred.
I meant to avoid his calls; however, unfortunately, Mark didn't put any calls through- for me to intentionally avoid. If I still had any tolerance, it was running out, and there was no way I was going to let him explain himself.
It was like being on a rollercoaster with my emotions. My rage was entwined with worry, hurt, anxiety, and other emotions I didn't recognize.
8
My thoughts wandered back to the day he came to see me, and we walked to the garden, hoping to push the wedding date back further than our parents had proposed.
"Do you understand there's nothing I wouldn't do for you to prove my love? So, tell me what's been bothering you." He reminded me, his palms capturing each of my cheeks.
"I know, thank you," I sneered, my smile hidden behind his hands. "But I don't think you'd do anything to change how I feel now."
"Hmm? Tell me, Sweet Pea, let's see how little you know about my love for you," he said, pulling me to the bench behind him, suddenly stern and impatient.
"What if you discover one day that all we have is a crush and some adolescent fantasies?" I gasped, my fingers teasing each other as I averted my gaze from him.
"Even as a child, I never wanted anyone to be your friend. I'd always known you were the one I wanted to marry since I was a kid, and believe me- damned me if you hadn't.
Therefore, there would be no one else standing in our way. That is something we should not accept. Do you hear what I'm saying? Nothing seems reasonable without you," He admitted, laughing as if he were still a child, "I can't breathe without you."
"Do you think air is a joke?" I said, leaping to hug him and wrapping my legs around him. When we both stood up from the bench, I had no idea.
I set my empty cup on the table, jerking away from my thoughts. I wouldn't have believed all the promises Mark made to me if I had known he was cheating on me.
I'm not sure how this is even possible. That was the guy who had been following me since kindergarten. He even turned down a scholarship to study in England.
My mind wandered back to when we were just best friends.
9
My best friend approached me with his hands behind him, his smile greeting me before his scent, the chocolate scent I've always known him to have.
"I brought you a necklace with my name engraved on it. I got one with your name on it as well. Is it to your liking?" He stepped behind me and assisted me in putting it on.
"What exactly are we? Thirteen-year-old girls? Don't you think we've grown past this now that you're eighteen and I'm sixteen?" I teased, seeming to be unappreciative of his gesture.
With his cheeks reaching his eyes, he answered, "You best get accustomed to it; our rings will bear each other's names." He was confident we'd marry because we were just best friends.
"Sweet Pea, I'm home," a voice said, jolting me out of my reverie.
I had planned what I would do when he arrived, but seeing him in front of me struck me speechless. His face got plastered with worry, and he drew his brows together in befuddlement.
"I had missed you. These last few weeks have been awful," Mark said as he stretched out to embrace me, but I stepped away before he could even touch me. I got repelled by his presence.
"I'm glad you at least know what it's like to be in hell. So, who came first, one or the other? Is it you or she? Did you make a joke behind my back?" I yelled at him, and he gave me a grimace.
"What exactly are you referring to, Sweet Pea? You greet me with this after I just returned from a lengthy trip? In case you forgot, I recently had surgery. I can't keep up with what you are accusing me of," In response to my mocking glance, his breathy voice cooed.
"Do not deceive me! Were you..."
"Please, this wasn't an easy one," he urged before I could continue. "My only desire was to get home and rest while hugging you. Is it because I didn't phone you every day when I left? I couldn't, so I wrote you emails, but you didn't respond to them. I sent three more emails and have yet to receive a response."
"I haven't gotten any emails. I'm no longer the naive girl you used to deceive. Your absence helped me understand how ridiculous this situation is. We've been married for almost six years and..."
"So, what the hell is going on here? Please put an end to it. At the very least, speak out so I can understand why you're upset; I don't like what you're doing, Judith; I don't like it," He emphasized, signaling that he was not hearing it with what I was accusing him of doing.
"Ahem," I turned to meet Sage's piercing gaze. "Do you mind if I say something?"
I yelled at him, "No, get out of this." Was he going to stand up for him?
"I'm not sure what's made you act like this, but I'm exhausted and weak. I would love to relax for a while," Mark walked out of the living room dismissively, avoiding any further charges.
"I bet your words are beating hard against his rib cage- the very one he had bought and paid for, Judith. No pun intended, though," his smile didn't reach the eyes while he added,
"Before you get into a confrontation with him, I recommend that you give him a chance to be okay. After hearing that he was good to travel back, he didn't want to wait another day."
Sage walked away without waiting for me to ask him to. I dashed into the bedroom, eager to continue, but was greeted instead by his soft snores.