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I Love You So Desperately

fAITHinmeQueenB
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Synopsis
"I would rather never get forgiven by you, if it means I won't get forgotten by you" He said holding Kashish tightly in his arms. He felt like if he loosens his arms now he will lose her forever. When Kashish faces rejection her whole life she loses her faith in love; her anger and pain do not let her live her life fully. Her past always haunts her and her hatred for her past never lets her forget it. So when life plays with her again and brings her back to face her past; what will she do? Its a story about love and healing. And about how time sets everything right.
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Chapter 1 - Chapter 1

Its 5 am the sun hasn't risen yet in Mirzapur, the weather is very pleasant a cold winter breeze is in the air, but in the Desai household, the day has already begun, a sweet melody as sweet as that of a nightingale, of a girl singing is heard throughout the house. The house is small but spacious enough and looks cozy there is a kitchen, bathroom, hall, and two small bedrooms just enough for two people to live in. In the kitchen the girl is preparing for her day, she cuts vegetables, kneads dough, and puts a pot on the stove for preparing morning tea. She sieves the tea and walks to a room nearby, she opens the curtains and softly calls "Ma wake up, it's already 6:15. I have to be at the hotel by 7:30". A woman slowly gets up from the bed "Your tea is the best, and because of this I can never be satisfied with others' tea anymore" The woman smiles brightly and continues "You have spoiled my habit". The girl starts arranging the bed and returns her smile "You don't even drink tea in someone else house now, whenever Meena Aunty invites you; you only eat samosa without touching the teacup". The woman laughs lightly "I can always see her frustration when I leave without finishing her tea" The girl joins in too.

The woman's mood suddenly changes "If you get married and leave the house, who is going to make my tea". The girl stops her work and walks towards her mom kneeling "Mom why do you say such things, you know very well I don't have the intention to ever leave you, so I can spoil you as much as I want", the women argue "But Kashish", Kashish gets up and sets a new bed sheet "No buts, now stop getting emotional, you have a doctors appointment today so don't be late". The woman straightens herself "Saina Desai might forget her name but never her appointment". Kashish laughs at her mother's antics "Okay my lovely Mother. Have breakfast it's in the kitchen, and I have called Mohit uncle he will pick you up and drop you back. And don't forget about the medicine". Saina cuts in "Okay Ma, sometimes I think you're my mother. I won't forget so now don't be late for work". Kashish runs to her room and comes out changing into a new fresh set of clothes, does some praying and then collects her bag, wears her sandals, and leaves the house but not before waving to her mother. Saina sighs "This girl when will she learn to slow down?".

Kashish POV

I changed into my anarkali salwar suit which I had sewn myself and then I prayed to god placed in the small praying area I had set up and then I prayed to my beloved grandma's photo hanging in the hall before leaving.

I start to search for an empty auto, and soon an auto rickshaw stops in front of me "Diamond Sun Hotel", within 45 minutes ride I reach my destination.

I have been working as a cook in the hotel for the past 3 years now I am not a professional cook but my food won the heart of the head chef that is why I got to work here, although it is not a big hotel the pay can support me and my mother's expenses.

"Kashish, always on time" I turn towards the voice to find Mrs. Arora smiling at me from the lobby, I smile "Good morning Mam", Mrs. Arora has been working in the hotel for the past 15 years as a head chef and is well respected among the colleagues. Soon we reach the locker room and dress up for our day. In the kitchen, I start my morning chore.

While I reach out towards the tap to wash the vegetables another hand reaches out to cause a brief contact and when I try to move it back, a hand grabs my wrist, I look up to see it is Paksh Arora son of Mrs. Arora and manager of the hotel. He smiles smugly "Sorry I was trying to wash my hand", I try to pull my hand from his grip but he tightens it more. "Leave my Hand, Paksh" I angrily try to free my hand, but instead of complying he pulls me causing me to jerk towards him, he laughs "Oh baby when will you stop playing hard to get, you know it's already been 3 years. Even celebrities would have given in". I forcibly pull my hand back "I have already told you multiple times I am not interested in you. And my answer will never change so just give up". Paksh has been persistently courting me for the past 3 years, I had already made my answer loud and clear but he doesn't take No for an answer. And he is a downright playboy, he makes every girl worker uncomfortable, I bear him only because of Mrs. Arora. Paksh's smile falters "Oh baby you like me you just haven't realized it yet". Before I can reply to him back, his phone rings, he picks up and softly replies "Yes Sir, I will be there in 5 minutes" He hangs up the phone and turns back towards me "I will see you later baby, bye". When he leaves I release a sigh of relief. "Wow, that was intense" one of my colleague and friend comments. "Where were you Alia?" I ask annoyed. "Chill! I came just now" she replies. I question raising my eyebrows "How much did you hear?", she sighs "Oh baby you like me, that part.... You know you should complain to the authorities". Kashish sighs "If I could I would have done that a long time ago, but he is the manager. Instead of him being punished I will lose my job". Alia snorts "If I could I would have given him a good lesson with my sandal, but we people don't even have that right". "What are you girls gossiping about? Get back to work" Mrs. Arora's voice interrupts, Alia walks away reluctantly. I start washing vegetables again ignoring my disturbing thoughts.

Saina's POV

At exactly 9:30 am doorbell rings I open the door to find Mohit standing holding a grocery bag "Exact on time, such a diligent being". Mohit straightens his shoulders "I am always on time, and Kashish gave me this duty how can I ever be late". I smile at his words "Okay, okay, and what is this bag for?". Mohit's face suddenly lights up "I brought ladoo for Kashish her favorite ones, my wife had made it" and he raises the bag signaling me to take it, I grab the bag but not before thanking him. I walk back into the kitchen to keep the ladoo in the fridge and leave the house. The ride to the hospital lasted for about an hour, we live a little distance from the main city so it takes time. I directly enter the hospital carrying my file, Mohit waits for me in the parking lot to drop me back home. As soon as I reach the hospital lobby, I walk towards the receptionist, "Hello, Asmi." she smiles seeing me "Good morning, again the usual check-up", I nod in reply, and she signals me "The doctor is in the cabin, you can meet him". I smile and thanks her, my check-up last for some minutes, and then I start to wait for my report. My report comes and the doctor comments everything is fine, I sigh in relief to hear it. I have been having monthly check-ups since the incident three years ago, and although I decline to waste money monthly, Kashish was adamant about me having a monthly check-up, she said in this way she can be assured. I feel very sorry for my daughter at such a young age she had to take all the responsibility. Due to my condition, she even had to leave college in between her studies, as a mother I can't even do anything for her. My daughter had to go through so many heartbreaks and hardships from a very young age yet her smile never falters in front of me, she always tries to stay strong despite being wounded deeply.

While I am walking out and am deeply in thought, I see a familiar face in the lobby, my breath suddenly stops it becomes difficult even to stand for me. The man I thought I will never see again in my life is standing only a few meters away. For a few seconds, I stand utterly shocked unable to move, "Saina" Mohit calls out, and I turn hearing my name. Unfortunately, the man also hears it he turns toward the voice and then toward me and we make eye contact. His face reveals he is surprised, but soon that expression changes to the one I am very familiar with, and he charges towards me. But due to passersby, his pace slows and I take this opportunity to run out from the hospital, Mohit follows "Mohit, let's go", Mohit complies without any question as I am sure my face gives away my horror. We both enter his auto rickshaw and just then I see the man coming out of the hospital, he spots. He runs after us, but couldn't meet the speed of the auto and slowed down, but before we could reach far he shouts "Do you think you can run forever, I will find you remember that". I break into a sweat hearing his words. "Are you okay? Saina" Mohit's voice brings me back to reality, "I am fine" I reply he doesn't question further. As soon as we return home I enter the house without uttering any words to Mohit.

Ladoo-Indian sweets

Anarkali-Indian dress