"Rebekah, are you listening to me?" Linda asked in frustration as I turned my attention back towards her and Rachel. I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't hear a word of what they were saying.
"I'm sorry Linda. I just have a lot to think about right now." I sighed as I rested my head on my fluffy pillow. I could feel her staring a hole into the side of my head as I avoided eye contact.
"I don't know what really happened a few days ago but this isn't the Rebekah I know. The Rebekah I know doesn't sulk around in her room or isolate herself from the world. She's the bravest and most kind-hearted person I've met. I know you never wanted any of this to happen but behaving like this... isn't going to change anything." Linda said as I looked at the ceiling. I could feel the stinging in my eyes as I tried to keep my tears at bay. She was right. The person that I've turned into, it isn't me. But what else am I suppose to do?
There isn't anyone who knows what I'm going through. What I'm being forced to do in order to save my best friend's mother's life.
But I couldn't exactly blame them for thinking the way they did. Because to them, it seemed like I was trying to escape the reality of my situation. But I wasn't. At least not anymore. I realize now that it was pointless for me to think I could prevent any of this from happening. There was never an escape for me.
Clearing my thoughts from the negative thoughts threatening to consume me, I quickly blinked away my tears. With a small smile, I turned towards them.
"You're right. This isn't me. I have to embrace reality."
I could see the sad expression on Linda's face as I tried to convince them that I was fine. Or at least I was trying to be. I knew that she was only trying to help and I was happy for that. I was happy for the fact that there was still someone on my side. That she would always be there to bring me back when it felt like I was drowning in my own misery. Even if it meant dealing with everything on my own, I know that she would always be there to help back on my feet.
That is why I needed to protect them. No matter what I won't let Linda or Rachel get dragged into any of this. Even if it meant sacrificing my happiness I'll do everything I can to keep them from being a pawn in my sister's twisted game.
I was brought out of my thoughts when someone gently rested their hand on mine. Blinking a few times I looked at a hesitant Rachel.
"Princess, you know if you ever want to talk about what happened we'll always be here to listen, right?" Rachel nervously asked. I could tell she was uncertain about whether I considered her as a friend I could confide in. But the truth was, even if we only knew each other for a few weeks I still trusted her. And I'm sure she felt the same way. After all, we're friends.
I removed the fluffy covers draped over my body and launched myself at them, throwing my arms around there necks as I held them tightly to me. They stumbled back a little before wrapping their arms around me.
"I know but there isn't anything for either one of you to worry about. I just needed some time to prepare myself for the events to come." I whispered as I saw my vision began to blur with unshed tears. It was partially the truth but I meant it when I said they didn't have to worry. They trusted and believed in me. That was all I needed to get through this.
"Are you crying, princess?" I heard Rachel sniffle. I felt their bodies shake and their tears soaked the fabric of my dress.
"I'm just happy to have both of you in my life, that's all," I replied as I finally let the tears I was holding back slide down my cheeks. I heard them laugh as we continued to hold each other close.
"That's good to hear Becks. I was starting to think you wanted us gone." Linda joked as we let go of each other. I quickly wiped away my tears as I looked at Rachel and Linda's tear-streaked faces.
"Let's never speak of this moment. Getting all emotional as if you were kidnapped or something. If Albert and the others hear about me sobbing like a little child because you locked yourself in your room, I'll never hear the end of it." Linda said in mock seriousness as she wiped away her tears with the back of her hand. Even if I could see them smiling in front of me I could still tell that there was something wrong.
That they were trying to hide what they were actually feeling. Even with a bright smile on Linda's face, I could see a glimpse of sadness in her eyes. I felt uneasy as if something bad was going to happen. But before I could ask them what they were hiding, a continuous knocking on my bedroom door prevented me from doing so.
"Who is it?"
"It's Albert, Lady Rebekah, I have a letter from her majesty, the queen." I heard Albert reply. I tried to think of a reason Aunt Mariah would send a letter to me. It was strange to hear that she actually sent a letter when she would normally arrange for us to meet in the garden or the library.
Shaking my head to once again clear my wandering thoughts, I was starting to overthink everything. And that wasn't good. Overthinking always makes everything worse than it should be. It makes you paranoid.
I sighed as I unlocked the door and opened it to meet Albert." Hi, Albert are you sur-" I abruptly stopped talking when I saw Albert and Arthur standing in front of me with a look of sympathy etched on their faces. I frowned at the look they were giving me as I reached for the letter on the silver platter in Albert's hand.
"Why are the two of you looking at me like that?" I asked in confusion, still standing in the doorway of my bedroom.
I heard them sigh in relief as Arthur grabbed my wrist and pulled me into a tight hug. "We're just happy that you're alright. After you came back to the palace the night you visited your family looking pale and disoriented, we didn't think something bad might have happened. We thought you were just exhausted and couldn't handle having to leave again."
I felt my body tense and the frown on my face, deepened. How did he know about that? The night I came back to the palace I was certain that no one other than the guards had seen me. And I knew that they wouldn't tell anyone about what they saw that night. So, how did Arthur know about it? Then realization struck me, someone had seen me the night I walked into the palace in a daze. And they must have told everyone about it. That was why everyone had looked at me with such concern and sighs of relief when I saw them. They thought something bad had happened. That must've been the reason for the sad look in Linda's eyes.
"I'm fine. Nothing happened that night." I replied as I felt his hold on me tighten. The uneasy feeling in the pit of stomach increased as I felt like something wasn't right. There was something I was missing. Something they thought I knew but I didn't.
"You don't have to lie to us, Rebekah. We know what happened that night. You don't have to put up a brave front."Arthur whispered. I felt the letter in my hand crumble as I tightened my grip on it. I was more confused than ever and there was defiantly something I was missing. But what is it?
I looked at Albert over Arthur's shoulder and it was the first time I ever saw him he look away. I also noticed that no one was looking me in the eye and it was starting to make me suspicious.
"What are you talking about Arthur? I'm not lying to any of you." I said as I gently pushed him away from me. I was unable to figure out what he was talking about.
"We know, Rebekah," Arthur said as his gaze softened. What exactly happened when I was avoiding everyone?
"What are you talking about Arthur? What is it that you know?" I asked in frustration as I narrowed my eyes at him. He tried to come close to me again but stopped when he saw me glaring at him.
"Will someone please answer my question!"
I could see them hesitating to answer me. They were acting as they were afraid I'll break if they told me.
"We know about your sister," Albert whispered, looking away once again. I looked at them in confusion. Did something happen to my family? Did Scarlet or Lizzy get injured?
"What do you mean? Did something happen to Scarlet or Lizzy? Is my family alright?" I asked in a panic. I looked at Arthur then Linda and Rachel, waiting for one of them to tell me. And what I heard next wasn't what I expected.
"We know about Lizzy's death."