Chereads / Loving Two Brothers / Chapter 18 - Phobia

Chapter 18 - Phobia

Quinn's POV

I leaned against the door, watching her gathering the pills and by the time she was done, she straightened her stance, resting against the counter, looking lost and scared at the same time.

I expelled a breath, not wanting to scare her anymore than I have.

"Are you okay?" I asked, striding towards her, and placing my hands on her shoulders. She nodded faintly, with her eyes downcast. "I'm sorry I scared you. I just wanted to come and check on you, after hearing your footsteps," I explained and she nodded curtly.

"It's fine,"

I stared at the bottle of water still sitting beside her on the counter. She must have noticed me because she spoke next, answering my unasked question.

"They're birth control pills. I have to take them to regulate my cycle and to prevent the painful cramps," she stammered but I nodded, feigning understanding.

From the stuttering of her words and the number of pills she's about to take, I knew she was lying but I wasn't about to call her out. More than that, she'd been really scared when I walked in on her.

Was this why she's been behaving strangely all night? Because she's got something to hide?

My heart squeezed at thoughts of her keeping a secret from me. But I wasn't surprised, not when she has built up so many walls to keep me away.

"I'll be in my room, baby. I need to take a shower and get out of these clothes," I informed her, leaning in to press my lips to her. She stilled but I pulled back, having no intention of deepening the kiss, not when she wasn't in the right state of mind. "Goodnight, love. I'll see you tomorrow,"

Giving her a small smile, I strolled out of the kitchen, heading into my bedroom. I was still curious to know the use of the pills she was taking and I was going to find out whether she was ready to tell me or not.

She couldn't be an addict, could she?

I shook these thoughts off my mind, because I knew that wasn't the case. I'd grown up around a few addicts and I knew the signs to look out for in such people. She had none of those. I needed to find out why she was taking those drugs. My mind wouldn't be at peace until I knew the answer.

Stripping off my clothes, I hopped into the shower, allowing the cold water to cascade over me. My thoughts drifted to how our night had started beautifully and how easily it had gone down the drain, from making progress with her, to having to fight against new walls just to get to her heart.

At times, I can't help wondering if it was always going to be like this. But I wouldn't give up on her. Despite being young, her eyes gave it away that she's been through some bad times and she was yet to let them go. I'd be with her until she was fine and ready to have me. I wasn't about to leave her alone to deal with her demons all alone, no matter how strong she tried to act. Deep down, I was aware she was just a big baby. My big baby.

A while later, I stepped out of the shower and pulled on sweatpants. I was ready for bed, but thoughts of Alexis in the next room drifted into my head. Somehow, I wanted to see her one last time and maybe give her a goodnight kiss before retiring to bed. Call it compensation for not having her in my arms.

Led by the need to see her, I stepped out of my room and gently tapped on her door, but I got no response. Again, I called her but I didn't get a response.

"I'm coming in…" I said, grabbing the door handle and slowly twisting it. Slowly, I slid the door open to see her fast asleep in bed, curled into a ball under the covers.

A smile lit up my face on seeing her peaceful face. I walked to her and leaned over her, gently pressing my lips to her head, and tucking the stray hairs from her messy bun behind her ear.

"Goodnight, baby," I whispered, kissing her head again before pulling back.

Rising to my feet, I reached for the lamp sitting on the nightstand to switch it off but a foil pack caught my attention. It was sticking out from the top of her opened pause, and I recognized it to be for a drug. My eyes narrowed, and I glanced at her, my need to know about the pills rising again.

No. I murmured to myself, knowing it was wrong to look into her things without her permission. I reached for the switch with this conclusion, to proceed with my initial plan, but again, I glanced at her sleeping face.

If you don't look now that you have the chance, how will you know, Quinn? She'll never let you go close to them.

These thoughts slammed into my head, and I quickly reached for the foil packet, pulling it out of the pause. Not just one, but extra two packets fell into the nightstand. With no intention of going back on my decision, I picked them up and began to carefully scrutinize them. The information I found had my mouth gaping open.

They were not just any pills but heavy sedatives that could take one out for hours. My heart fell, recalling that she'd taken them. Quickly, I reached for her and placed a palm on her neck but she was out cold.

"What the fuck, Alexis?" I gritted out in clenched teeth, my palms balling into fists.

What the fuck does she need these sedatives for? Has she been sleep deprived?

She wasn't just taking one, but three different ones and that could be detrimental to her health. How did she not know she was harming herself? How long has she been on these drugs?

All of these questions ran through my mind, gradually driving me insane, and fuelling my anger. Knowing there was nothing I could do until she was awake. Packing the sedatives into her pause just like how I'd seen them, I switched the light off and stepped out of the room, slowly closing the door. Not like whatever sound it made could wake her up.

That night, I went to bed, deeply worried and concerned about Alexis. Different scenarios and assumptions to why she was getting herself heavily drugged on purpose flashed through my mind, but I chose to ignore all until I could figure it out myself. A while later, I was able to fall asleep.

*****

I felt the heat of a soft body pressed tightly against mine, and the familiar scent of roses sailed into my nostrils, as I began to wake up from sleep. Slowly, I opened my eyes to see the dull light of dawn seeping into the room through the windows, but instead of the usual morning peace and quietness before the streets below became busy, the noise of the heavy downpour of the rain accompanied by thunder and lightning surrounded me.

The body beside me moved more against me, curling into a ball and gripping hard on the covers to cover up from the cold. I ran a hand across my face and wrapped my arm around her waist, pulling her flush against me and covering us both with the blanket,

Alexis was still fast asleep, soft snores erupting from her lips. Seeing her so peaceful made me smile and I subconsciously pressed my lips to her temple while she slept, but she murmured some incoherent words, widening my smile.

I sighed in comfort, surrounded by the heat of our bodies and the noise of the heavy downpour, it screamed of the kind of comfort I'd never experienced and I loved that I finally got her to spend the weekend with me in my home and in my bed, just like we were meant to be.

She was mine, and if she doesn't know it yet, I was going to prove it to her this weekend.

I pulled her against me, until her head was resting on my chest and I tried closing my eyes to return to sleep, but then I realized something felt off. A frown marred my face as I tried to fight off the weird feeling, while wondering what was amiss. But after a few minutes of gathering my scattered thoughts, I finally picked on it.

Alexis hadn't slept in my bed the previous night, and she'd be out cold on sedatives. How the fuck did she get in my bed?

While these thoughts assailed my mind, I felt her move, practically crawling on top of me, with her legs thrown on either side of my body and her hands resting on my shoulders. Despite the memories of what I'd discovered last night, I couldn't stop the smile that lit up my face.

"Baby," I whispered into her ear, placing my hands on her hips to hold her still.

"Mmm..." she moaned in her sleep, widening my smile, but I held her to me possessively, loving how close we were.

Then suddenly, thunder rumbled, and a scream lodged out of her throat, her eyes suddenly snapping open and her arms on my shoulders holding on me tightly.

"Hey…" I called to her, rubbing her back soothingly and hugging her tightly to me. "I'm here, love, don't be scared," I whispered and her sleepy eyes found mine. She blinked a few times before letting out a groan and resting her head on my chest.

"Did you run away from your room because of the thunder?" I asked as it finally dawned on me, the reason she might be in my bed.

"Mmhmm…" she groaned out, closing her eyes. "I'm sorry I invaded your privacy, but I was so scared,"

"You're welcome to invade my privacy at any time, love," I kissed her head and she relaxed more against me, as she moved to find the perfect spot, but she had me letting out a growl when her core settled against my morning wood, making me harder than I'd been initially.

"Alexis…"

"Mmm…" she moved again, and I had to place my hands on her hips to keep her still.

"You're a little temptress, aren't you?" I growled into her ear, allowing my hands on her hips to travel higher. Her soft skin felt so smooth against my palms as I continued caressing her, with my hands moving up her thighs.

I felt her shiver from my touch, and an audible gasp escaped her lips when my hands slid past the sheer material of her flimsy night dress, finding the waistband of her panties.

"Q-Quinn…" she murmured in a shaky voice, sitting up.

"Yeah…"

"We…we can't…" she murmured in a barely audible voice but I smirked, an idea popping into my head.

Ignoring her words, I let my fingers trace the waistband of her panties, before slowly slipping one in. She gasped, her hands grabbing onto mine to stop me, but I pinned her with an intense look.

"Why can't we? Are you scared you'll like it too much?"

She shook her head.

My free hand continued caressing her soft skin, moving from her lower stomach to her navel and tracing circles around it that had her shivering and releasing a shaky breath, but that wasn't my final destination.

"Answer me, Alexis," I asked at the same time as I reached one of her luscious breasts, tracing my thumb around one of her hard nipples and pinching hard on it.

A squeal flew out of her lips and she threw her head back, unknowingly grinding her wet core against my growing hard-on.

"Why can't we, baby?" I asked again, shaking her hand that was holding onto mine off, and pulling it out of her panties. I heard her release a breath, thinking it was over, but I cupped her panty-cladded pussy, feeling how wet her panties were, and the outline of her engorged clit poking my palm. "I'll only stop if you give me a tangible reason, Alexis,"

She breathed out, squirming under my touch.

"I… I don't…"

"You don't what, Alexis?" I stared into her pleasure dazed eyes, just as I slid her panties to the side and flicked my thumb against her aching clit.

"Oh God… Quinn…" she gasped, her eyes fluttering shut.

"Eyes on me, baby. Look into my eyes and tell me you don't want this,"

She struggled to pry her eyes open, while I continued rubbing her clit with my thumb, loving the little whimpers that were falling from her parted lips.

"Come on, baby, tell me you don't want this,"