May 7th, 2022.
Today was my birthday. Happy birthday to me I guess. I've always celebrated my birthdays alone, my parents died when I was super young, and the foster kids I grew up with were complete assholes. They would tease and bully me for the color of my skin, they would beat me up for it every day for the first year, and the punishment kept getting worse and worse. Although my skin wasn't like the children I grew up with, I wasn't ashamed. But eventually, you can only take so many insults before wanting to end things.
I attended my local college to become an engineer in architecture, It was fairly difficult but I managed to pass my courses. I started college when I was 18 years of age, and now I'm 22 years of age. I thought life would get easier after graduating but boy was I wrong. I got turned down from every internship and apprenticeship I applied for, even though I met the qualifications. I was forced to work a shitty minimum wage job, loading boxes onto trucks for 10 hours a day.
The job physically, and mentally drained me and my motivation and drive to do better. I was also so lonely, I lived by myself, in a small apartment complex not too far from my work. The price was not worth the stress of scrapping $2,200 dollars a month just for a place to sleep. Last month I thought my life was seeming to get better, I met this beautiful girl. She was the prettiest girl I've seen. She had long brown hair, with nice pale skin, and she had the body of a supermodel. She also had the most captivating orange eyes.
Yet I went on a couple of dates with this girl. I took her out to eat at the nicest restaurants in the city, paid for her clothes, and bought her a pearl necklace. She had me in love... To my avail, she was just using me, she had a boyfriend the whole time, and the worst part about it was. I did not SMASH! Not even a kiss was exchanged, only a side hug. On our last date, which was today of all days on my birthday she stood me up. She told me that she was using me for money and she had a man in her life already. She said she regretted all of it and said she would never get with someone like me.
What a birthday present. This is why I'm here talking to myself, sitting alone on top of my apartment complex roof, drinking whisky to the face. All this built-up trauma over the past 22 years of my life had been suffering. No matter what I did to try to pull myself out of the rut never worked. So today on my 22 birthday...I was going to kill myself.
I downed the rest of my bottle of whisky and began to walk to the edge of the roof. It overlooked the small area I stayed in. A sudden wave of tears had fallen over me as a rush of reality had set in. I continued to sob and sob, with salty tears and snot falling across my face. I looked up into the night sky and shouted out to God, or whatever you want to call it.
"Why have you treated me like this! If there is a God out there here me, please! In heaven, the afterlife, or even I can get a second chance at this thing, please make me someone who is Loved!"
I shouted my words into the heavens above, screaming and crying barely getting my words out. I looked down toward the street below, I took a deep breath in, paused, and without a second thought, I jumped off the edge. Instant regret went through my mind, I should've just used a gun, the feeling of falling was horrible, and I could see myself getting closer and closer to the ground. I tried to close my eyes but they were kept open by the adrenaline pumping through my veins.
Before becoming a part of the pavement below, a silent voice whispered into my mind.
"You should come with me Nen Kano."
And before I knew it a blinked and opened my eyes, to me sitting in a nice leather brown chair in a nice brown stained wood office that overlooked a city in the clouds. Where was I? Is this heaven? Or maybe there is a waiting room for heaven and everyone who dies has to get interviewed. A sudden knock had eclipsed the door.
Knock Knock Knock...
Then the big black office doors that stood well above 7 feet tall swung open, and through the doors walked a woman, with a black pants suit. Was God a woman?