I put Liam in the crib as I continue cleaning the mess he made with a cup of water he spilled on the floor earlier. He groaned when I put him down so I racked the crib so he could continue sleeping. I took a towel to wipe the floor and since he was still sleeping, I decided to clean the whole room.
"Xhyrah?" I was surprised when I heard someone call me from the door.
"Yes?" I asked her.
"Is Liam still sleeping?" she asked pertaining to the baby I had just put in the crib earlier. I nodded and she moved inside to look at the crib. "Can you come with me for a second?"
"Yeah, sure," I said and put on the towel I was holding, and followed her to the headquarters. "What is it all about?" I asked her.
"Mother superior wants to say something," she said. I wonder what it is that they had to call me in. We knocked to an old oak door a few times before entering and entered the Mother superior's office where you can see her sitting on a dark oak chair in front of the table.
"Good morning, " she greeted us.
"Good morning, Mother superior," we greeted her back. the old Nun's face went from a smile to a remorse face. I sat down in front of her. "What is it?" I asked.
"You've been with us for years now and I want to tell you what happened," she said. Her voice gives me an idea about what is happening. I nodded quietly and continued listening to what she was about to say. "The orphanage is slowly losing funds, in a few months, we might need to get rid of the kids,"
"Get rid? Why? What happened?" I asked her.
"6 months ago was the last time that company has given us funds and they said they were never going to donate to us again. We don't have any sponsors anymore,"
"I thought they promised to donate while they're here,"
"I don't know what happened but they started to not donate regularly and then last week, they officially told me they would stop," she said.
I couldn't help but to get worried of the kids living in the orphanage where I have been in for quite a while now. We continued talking inside the Mother superior's office and I found out that there really is no other way for them to do anything if the worse is going to happen. Losing funds means, they are in no power to keep the orphanage going. That means they would have to leave.
I went out of the room thinking about how I could possibly help the headmistress.
It's been two years since I separated ways with Zach. I lived at my parent's house for 2 months after the separation and moved here. Unlike what I said, I didn't move out of the country. Ali sent me to therapy 10 hours away from home and that was when I got to see this orphanage.
It was when Ali sent me to a 3 day stay in a forest house 10 hours away from home and just down the road is where the orphanage was standing. I had to book again and stayed 7 more days only to interact with the children.
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FLASHBACK
"I don't need this, Ali," I told him on the phone as I look at the green things outside the car that I am not used to seeing before. Unlike the city, All that I could see right now are green things like trees and plants. We are driving up the hill and I could see the city being too far away from me. "The drive is too long,"
"Chill, it was really nice there, I stayed there for months," he said. I can hear him typing on the other side.
"Are you at work?" I asked him.
'Yeah," he answered.
"Well then, I'll hang up now," I sighed.
"The long wait is almost over, Xhyrah. You're depressed so want you to unwind,"
"I am not depressed," I told him.
"Well, if you say so,"
I hang up the call and continued looking at the tall trees standing next to the road. I've been sitting in the car for quite a long and I am already pissed because of the long drive.
It's been 2 months since I and Zach were separated. I have been laying low since that time and never left the house because I was scared of what might happen if I see him in the streets.
It was bad. I've been crying badly at night whenever I remember him and the way I hurt him. it's haunting me down and I suddenly started to regret everything and sometimes cry about it for an unspoken reason.
That is why Ali called me depressed and forced me to sit for 10 hours to visit his favorite place. I am not an outside girl. I don't like going outside that much and I am not exposed to nature that much so I don't know how others feel like when they get close to nature. All I do is paint at home before so this is my first time being on a trip like this.
"We're here," the driver said. I went out of the car and looked at the huge house in front of me. Well, it was not that huge. It's not as huge as my house. It was smaller but it looks very big to be occupied by only one person.
It has a wooden home design and it perfectly fits into the place because there are plants around the place like tall trees and a garden on the side.
The driver left and I was all alone. The first thing I did is to look around the house. Everything is almost brown and wooden. Even the fridge has wooden wallpaper and it looked aesthetic so I took a picture and posted it on my Instagram.
I took more photos and it felt like it was the only thing that I liked about the house. The aesthetic vibes it was giving at its perfect to post on Instagram.
I went up to the bedroom outside and went to the balcony. The house has a kitchen, a living room with a huge TV, There are glass walls and I didn't expect it to blend perfectly with the wooden interior.
The room is airconditioned. There was also enough room in the comfort room. It was big, especially the first floor because it has a lot of places to hang out.
It's a shame that I am all alone in the place. I wish I could've taken someone with me. Ali was busy and I have never been in touch with Aira since I and her brother got separated so I don't really have someone to take with me.
I sat on the lounge on the balcony and enjoyed the warm breeze as I take pictures of myself. I haven't posted in a long time. I never even told everybody that I lost my baby so I decided not to post myself and focus on posting pictures of the place.
I spent hours of taking pictures and when I felt like I'd had enough, I stopped and got extremely bored. I went back to the balcony after taking a bottle of milk from the fridge and saw a tall white house just near the house. There are only 2 buildings that I could see and one of them is the place I am staying in.
I wondered what that building was for so I decided to grab the bike beside the house and drove to the near building.
I saw kids playing on the road. I thought it was dangerous to play on the road but there doesn't seem like a lot of cars passing this area. It turned out to be an orphanage. Because of the number of children and A nun looking after them, I already knew.
The kids stopped playing when they saw me coming and seemed to be surprised by my presence.
"Hey," a Nun greeted me with a wide smile. I looked at her and the kids gathered behind her when she walked toward me. "Are you the new guest in that house?" she asked pertaining to where I just came from 5 minutes ago.
"Hey, yeah," I greeted and answered her question.
"Nice meeting you, my name is Lila," she held out his hand for a shake.
"Xhyrah," I said.
"Our name sounds the same," she said and we both laughed.
"So, this is an orphanage?" I asked her. She smiled and nodded. "Why is it so far from the city?" I asked.
"Well, we don't have the funds to move to another place so we decided to stay," she said with a smile. It was a pretty old building. And thinking that they live around this place is sad. They were alone in a home surrounded by trees.
"Guys!" she called the kids, again probably 3-14. There are a lot of them and I cannot even count.
She introduced me to the children and there were 14 of them.
"Hello, my name is Xhyrah. Call me Xhy," I told them.
I hang out and played with the children until 5 pm and I had so much fun that I couldn't stay in that wooden house during the day anymore because I go to the orphanage most of the time.
It was so much fun being with the kids. I play with them and help take care of and feed them. I get to meet the other sisters too and especially, the very kindhearted Mother superior who even invited me to come by tomorrow for her birthday.
It was my last day in the wooden house but I felt bad about leaving them right away. I had so much fun whenever I am with them and I even forgot my problems because of them. So I called Ali to book me for another 7 days. He did right away and I attended the Mother superior's birthday party.
The party was nothing like parties in the city. They only cooked normal foods for dinner but bought 2 cakes. For me, it wasn't enough. But when I saw the glint in the eyes of the children, I was very happy too.
They appreciate small things right away and it's what I like about them the most. The children had enough pieces of cake for themselves. We sang happy birthday to the Headmistress and that was it.
The bedtime is 9 pm and while Lila was busy putting them to sleep. I was left on the first floor cleaning the huge kitchen when I heard knocks on the door. I didn't notice it at first but I saw a car outside and it drove fast away from the orphanage while I put the mop in the proper place.
I wiped my hands dry and went to the door. I opened the door and saw a brown basket. "OH MY GOD!!!" I screamed when I saw a baby boy in the basket when I removed the clothing covering it because it was moving. "LILA!! MOTHER SUPERIOR!!" I screamed and took the poor baby left outside our door on a very cold night.
I took the baby in and saw Lila running towards me with the headmistress coming behind her back. "Jesus Crist," the Mother superior said and did a sign of the cross before holding the child in her arm. "Did someone leave the baby?"
"Yes, it was a black car,' I told them.
"There's a letter, OH MY GOD," Lila said and opened a pink envelope. She covered her mouth after reading it and gave it to me.
To the kind sisters in the orphanage,
I cannot say my name and introduce myself but I wish you could take care of my baby. I gave birth to him a month ago and got diagnosed with cancer. I hope you could understand my situation. I cannot give him to my family because I have none. I want him to have a great life and enjoy growing up. I don't want him to die with me so please take care of him. I could be dead 4 months from now and it breaks my heart to leave him all alone. Please name him Liam. he was born 3/4/2***, 9:34 pm.
-a mother
The message broke my heart. It was said in simple words but it hurt me a lot. It reminded me of my lost baby. I cried hard after seeing her message. We all felt bad for the kid and his mother after reading the letter.
That night, I could barely even sleep because memories were brought back to me. I lost my baby and was left alone. This baby lost his mother and was left alone. I wonder how much it hurts to send your own baby to an orphanage thinking that you could never see him again. The thought made me cry even more.
The next day, I got very close to Liam. I was already attached to him in a span of 2 days and I never want to let go of him. I treated him as my own and took care of him until my last days in the cabin.
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But after a few weeks, I came back. And that was when I decided to move. And now, I've been staying here for more than 2 years. Liam is already big. He can now walk and do things and seeing him grow filled my empty heart full and got me occupied for years. Liam and the orphanage brought me up again that is why I am not leaving. Now how could I let them get rid of the kids?