Mamoru
"Has that been helping?" Toh inquired.
Mamoru shakes his head. "Even when I am away from her, she finds a way to affect me." He paused. "However, even with my self-control slipping. I have never thought to make a proper move. I only confessed because I saw she was on the verge of giving up on love. She has already given up on most things. Had I not said anything then, she would have given up on everything."
The text messages and the calls. Ki never fails to message and call him during his other city missions. He tried ignoring her calls before, and next thing he knew. He woke up one morning and found her beside him. She cried and told him that she assumed that he was in a position where he couldn't reply and immediately rushed to his side.
Since then he hasn't tried that again.
"I am not saying that's wrong. In fact, you made the right call there. However, it does worry me how focused you have been on her well being. What about yourself?"
It takes Mamoru a few minutes to process what Toh was saying to him.
"You're really a good guy."
"As a psychologist. It's only normal that I notice these things. But really Tsueno, you should think about your own well being for once. While I must admit that your presence in Sumire's life helps her a lot. My professional ethics won't let me to turn a blind eye to you neglecting your own well being for the sake of another person."
Mamoru laughed bitterly. "Yuhi told me off already. But thank you for being concerned. I understand Mashima, but I just want her to smile. I really don't need anything more."
He has never thought of asking for anything more.
Toh is quiet for a few minutes before speaking up again. "I'll admit, that I am losing my composure. Even if I want to be mindful of her choices and not restrict her. Even though I just encouraged you to pursue her. I am terrified of losing her."
Mamoru frowned at those words. "What changed? I thought you were full of confidence."
"I was. But ever since we returned from our trip. I have felt the need to rush. When I saw her crying like that, I truly felt defeated. I thought I understood how much she liked Terashima. I thought I knew, but I underestimated her feelings. She needs him more than she would ever need me. Acknowledging that wasn't easy." Toh kept his head down.
Mamoru didn't know what to say. It was his first time seeing Mashima this way.
"It's not like she doesn't love you, you know that right?"
"I know she has strong feelings for me." Toh nodded. "I don't necessarily need to hear her say the words I love you, knowing how she feels about those words. But, knowing that she loves Terashima Yuhi and knowing she won't hesitate to use those words for him. Makes me think that her feelings for me can easily disappear."
'You can't miss something you never have.' Mamoru recalled something Masaru told him. Right, the reason why the guys in Nanairo feather can still act the same way with Ki is that. They have never experienced being in a relationship with her. So they can still continue acting the same way, without worrying about being left behind.
Before he could reply to those words, Ki appeared from the doorway.
Ki didn't just return with blankets, but a tray filled with deserts.
"I thought it would be better if you ate something too Ru. You can eat and then take your medicine." Sumire's gaze fell on the clock in the living room. "It should be time, right?"
"Yeah."
Sumire nodded and took a seat beside him and not Mashima. She placed her hand on his forehead. The contact of her hand on his forehead aside, she was sitting so close to him that he caught a whiff of her scent. It's different than usual, is she wearing perfume?
Normally he would have more resistance to this. But after having that conversation with Toh. Mamoru felt his entire face turning bright red and his palms turning sweaty. Normally she too would be oblivious to this too, but today- Ki made eye contact. Slowly her face turned red and she backed away.
"I-I think your fever is still bad."
"R-right." Mamoru stammered.
After a few minutes of awkward silence. Toh spoke up, he walked over and placed a kiss on Sumire's forehead.
"I'm going to go out for a bit, the shop needs me. Stay here until I return?"
Despite the casual words, Mamoru noticed a hidden warning in that tone. It seems even Mashima has caught onto Ki sneaking away and doing missions for Aki.
Sumire laughed softly. "Mm, I'll be good and wait. Oh, if your going out. Can you drop by the bakery? I placed an order a few days ago and it should be ready."
"I got it." Toh's gaze fell on him briefly and Mamoru understood and he tore his gaze away.
He hears the sound of a whimper, a light moan. He doesn't know what kissing sounds like at all. Whenever he has bumped into a couple making out on campus or anywhere, he always has his headphones on. But usually when he is with Ki, he doesn't use them. Today is one of those days.
Mamoru doesn't know how long he stayed still, but eventually he hears some parting words. Thinking it was safe, he turned around only to find Toh fixing Ki's shirt and her hands on his shirt buttons-
Sumire catches his gaze and pushes Toh away. "I-I will see you later."
Toh rolled his eyes and nodded before exiting the room. The minute he left Sumire grabbed hold of his bag and started to empty the contents. Mamoru's sweat fell seeing what she was doing.
"Uh Ki?"
Sumire frowned. "I can't find your medicine. Did you not take it with you?"
"I ran out."
At those words she looked at him accusingly. "Since when?"
"Maybe a few days ago?" Mamoru tried to sound casual about it but he sees a dark aura wrap around the girl. "A week."
At those words she looked at him with a mixture of anger and sadness. There were small droplets of tears in the corner of her eyes. Mamoru looked at her alarmed. Wait, why is she crying? No, that was a stupid question. Ki seldom cries in front of others and puts on a brave front. But with people she is comfortable with, she never hesitates.