Alex: I stayed up all night after seeing Cass for the first time again I had to find a way to get her back. To get my daughter back. I couldn't leave New York until it happened.
The next morning I practically ran into tour meeting. "Dancers," I said when I reached the conference room, "That's what we need."
"I'm sorry?" my older brother, Cay, asked, raising his eyebrows.
"Dancers," I said, "We've been looking for what we need. We need dancers."
"I mean it's not a bad idea," my younger brother, Seth, said, sitting back in his chair, "But what's the angle you're playing?"
"No angle," I lied, "They just help get the crowd going, add something to the show." I did a silent prayer they'd say yes.
"Do we have the money for this?" my dad, as well as our manager, asked.
"We have money set aside for something big right?" I asked, "If we turned that something huge into something large or maybe even medium sized, we can swing a starting salary, as well as we can have them on contract for a percentage per show."
Everyone just stared in silence at me for a moment. "Since when are you helpful?" Cay asked.
"Since when do you know how money works?" Seth asked.
"Since when do you pay any attention in our meetings?" my dad asked. I just rolled my eyes.
"Guys, this tour matters to me too," I said, "I'm not totally gone." With that I realized I had blown my cover.
I watched three guys simultaneously shift in their seats, crossing their arms.
"What's her name?" Seth asked incredulously.
I sighed, not sure how to word this. "I found Cass last night," I said quietly, "She's working as a bartender in this little dive."
"Cass?" my dad asked, his harsh tone from earlier wiped clean. As much as I was the black sheep of the family, my family understood Cass. They understood what she was to me. She was my treasure. I'd spend my whole life searching for her, even drive myself insane, just to have her.
"Like your Cass?" Cay asked. I nodded.
"Did you hear anything about Allie?" Seth asked.
Hearing my daughter's name was like my kryptonite. I wanted to cry at just hearing her name. "She's 8," I said, "In 3rd grade. And I can never see her again." Saying those words made me collapse into a chair.
"So you want to have dancers to offer Cass a job," my dad guessed. I nodded.
"You knew Cass. She would never have wanted this," I said, "She wanted to be a dancer. And I…" I couldn't finish. Took that from her.
"I also know Cass isn't going to take it if she thinks its charity," Seth pointed out.
"She has to," I said, "I need her too."
Cass: "Mommy look!" Allie called from the living room of our apartment. I walked out of the bathroom, still pulling my tee shirt into place. She did a little turn on one foot, her form a little floppy, but otherwise nearly perfect.
"Nice job!" I said, going back into the bathroom.
"Can I stay up and wait for you tonight?" Allie asked.
"I don't think so baby," I said, "Its a school night." I slid my lipstick on. Allie's shoulders slumped. "Did you finish your homework, my little ballerina?" I asked.
"Yeah," she said, shifting from foot to foot and not making eye contact. I knew she was lying.
"Could I check it?" I asked, putting my hands on my hips.
She gave me a cute little smile and said, "Just give me a few minutes." She ran back into the living room and I shook my head.
"School work comes first," I said, "And don't lie to your mother."
Finally a knock came at the door. I was putting in my earrings when I answered. The woman who lived in the apartment next door smiled.
"You're going to be late if you don't hurry," the woman, Dorothea, said.
"Yeah," I said. Dorothea was a God send. To me she was the mother I had never had. She watched Allie during my shifts, she gave life advice, and looked out for me. To Allie she was a grandmother, someone besides me who gave her love, and occasionally a good spoiling, something I couldn't afford.
"How is my Alison-Wonderland?" she asked Allie.
"Good," Allie said with a beaming smile.
"Make sure she finishes her homework, Ms. Dorothea," I said, eyeing Allie, whose shoulders slumped. I grabbed my bag before giving Allie a hug and a kiss on the top of her head. "I love you baby," I said to her.
"Love you too Mommy," Allie said.
"I'll give you a kiss when I get home tonight," I promised. I turned to Dorothea. "Thank you so much. I owe you."
"No you don't baby," she said, "Now go or you will."
I smiled and headed off to work.
The bar was only a couple blocks from my apartment. "Hey Cass," Roy said as soon as I came in the back door.
"Hey," I said as I clocked in. There were our regulars, but otherwise it appeared to be a slow day. And to my delight, Alex was nowhere to be found.
That was until our door opened a few moments later. "Hey," he said when he walked through the door, "Can you talk?"
I weighed my options. On one hand I could tell him no and he could continue to bug me until I said yes. Or I could out the middle man.
"You got it covered here Roy?" I asked.
"Go talk to your superstar Cass," Roy teased. I rolled my eyes.
I poured myself a quick shot, tossing it back. "Let's talk," I said, trying not to cough
We took a seat in the booth farthest from the bar. "I thought I made myself clear yesterday, Alex," I said.
"Would it kill you to just shut up and listen to me?" Alex asked, "Maybe I'm actually genuinely trying to help you."
"I don't need help," I said, shaking my head.
"I have a job for you," Alex said, ignoring my statement, "A dance job." I didn't say anything. "We're going on tour in a couple of months. We need dancers. Auditions are a week from today."
"Wow," I said, feeling my face heat up with anger, "Listen Alex, I know I may not live in a mansion or whatever, but I don't need your charity."
Alex looked struck, "It's not charity."
"Oh?" I asked, "So you just happened to have a dance job for me the day after you see me tending bar?"
"I didn't come up with it for you," Alex said, but the way he could barely look me in the eyes told he was lying.
"Unbelieveable," I said, standing up.
"It's a good job," Alex said, following me.
"I have a perfectly fine job," I responded. Alex stood quiet for a moment, and I almost thought I'd lost him.
"I'm not judging the auditions," Alex blurted. I turned around. I didn't really know what to say.
"You're just going to tell whoever it is doing the auditions to just let me through anyway," I said, brushing him off, "Sue me for wanting a dance career for real."
"I won't even tell them you're coming," Alex said, "If you want fair, I'll make it fair. You deserve that much."
I didn't know what to say again. "I have a flier. We're giving them out to all the best dance schools in the city," Alex pressed.
"I don't know if I can do this," I said, "Alex to work with you, for you, I just don't know."
Alex: She had a fair point. But I couldn't lose her. "What about Allie?" I asked. It was the first time I had said her name since the split. I felt like an addict. I said it once, and all I wanted to do was keep saying it. It felt so good, so familiar.
"I can't take her on tour," Cass pointed out, "She's in school."
"We can come up with something," I said, "Has she ever seen you happy? Truly happy?"
Cass walked up to me. She was so close. I could have kissed her. I knew boundaries. Instead I just stood there, wishing I could. "You don't know my life," Cass said. She ripped the flier out of my hand. "I need to think about it," she said, "Don't get your hopes up."
I smiled. I couldn't help but not follow orders.