Here I am again, scrolling on my feed and I'm so bored. I have nothing to do because we don't have class but we have a lot of assignments and I'm too lazy to do it so I'm just here lying on my bed and continuing to scroll in my Facebook feed not until someone texted me.

"Hello babe, Good Morning. I love you"

"Morning" I replied.

I don't know but now a part of me wants to be far away from him and I don't know why I am acting like this. He's my boyfriend alright. I love him a lot but sometimes I am wondering if I truly love him or if he loves me the way I love him. I am bad right? I just can't understand myself I can say that I love him but there's part of me that longing for something and I don't know what is it. I'm not like this before.

I decided to put my phone on my bedside table and I close my eyes and pray. I don't know what should I do with him now. When I opened my eyes I felt relaxed and I know God will help me with my problem.

Before I forgot, my name is Akleigsha Marie Salvador. I am 18 years old and taking up Science, Technology, Engineering Mathematics at Harrison University. Honestly speaking, I am not fond of mathematics or science. I'm such an idiot when it comes to it but here I am taking up of it and having my mind wander every class because I can't understand the lessons.

The time now is 9:30 am and here I am lying on my bed and don't care about the things I need to finish. Well as a model student like me you should do your work a day before the deadline wherein you'll truly rush yourself to finish it. Just kidding. Well, it is better that you have something to pass than none right?.

I admit that I am too lazy when it comes to studying but it doesn't mean I am truly an idiot I can score more than average if I'm truly committed to it except for mathematics, of course, I accept that when it comes to mathematics and physics I can't get my mind working just looking at those numbers makes me sleepy. I want to stop schooling but I know studying is for myself and I know that I can only help myself in the future. It's my senior year and next year I'll welcome myself as a college student.

And because I have nothing to do I called my boyfriend.

"Babe, let's have a date"

"Hello, babe, Where to?"

"Hmm, let's go to cybernoia"

"Right now?"

"Yeah"

"Alright, I'll just prepare myself then I'll pick you up okay? I love you"

"Hmm, no need to pick me up. I'll drive my car. See you"

I hung up and put my phone back on the table and went to the bathroom to take a bath. If you noticed I did not reply when he says I love you because for me I love you is not a question that you need to answer. I'm not always like that I do reply sometimes. Hope you understand.

*a few minutes later*

Time 10:30 am

I'm already here in our meeting place. I'm waiting for him. Do you want to know what kind of place our meeting place is? This place is the hangout ground of our buddies we always went here after lunch and after class. Cybernoia is a computer café near our school. Well, my buddies love to play online games and they influence me too. I can't tell if they are a bad influence on me or not. LOL. But for me, they're good friends of mine. I was able to come out of my comfort zone because of them.

So while waiting for him I entered the shop and log-in my membership account. I decided to purchase my membership account last year because before I always went to the counter if my time runs out and sometimes I can't finish all my time but I need to pay the fixed price. I'm not short of money but having membership accounts has a lot of benefits like extra hours, and a point system, also you can save your time if you log out. Minutes passed but he was still not here I decided to watch Youtube. I'm not the type of girl who loves to wait and my patience is really limited but I have no choice but to wait for him.

*After a while*

"Hey, babe, how long have you waited? I'm sorry the traffic is so bad on my way here" He said while coming close to me. He kissed me on my cheeks and there it is I felt nothing when he kissed my cheeks. It's not like this before. What's wrong with me? Before just a kiss on my hand, I'm already happy.

Well finally he's here, He has his usual get-up and perfume but his smell has a mixture of female scents on it. I get it my nose is like a dog. I looked at his face, his lips is so red like he eat something spicy.

I smiled "Well it's okay I understand that TRAFFIC IS SO BAD and your unit is VERY VERY FAR FROM HERE~" I checked my time it was already noon I waited for him for more than an hour. His unit is only 30 minutes away from here how bad is the traffic?. tsk

"Did you have your lunch?" he nodded

"Well is she delicious?" I asked him. I lowered my voice when I said she.

"What?" he asked in confusion

"Your lunch" I answered back

"Well of course it is delicious" he smiled wildly.

"I'm hungry"

"You haven't eaten your lunch yet?"

"of course dear. I have been waiting for you here. I thought you would love to have lunch with me. I didn't expect that you had already eaten your lunch" I smiled to hide my irritation.

"Well I'm sorry, I didn't know that you were waiting for me here if I had known I rush here for you" he replied to me. I maintained my smile. It's always like this I'm used to it. He's not like this before. What has changed?.

"Babe don't be mad at me, okay? I love you. Let's go eat. I'll be with you" He said while holding my hand.

"Okay let's go, I love you too". The mall is just a walking distance of our hanging ground so we decided to go to it. I choose to eat on Javii because I'm craving chicken and fries. "Can you order for me? I want some chicken and fries" I asked him

"ahm, well babe can you line up and just order for yourself? I will just find some spot for us to sit" just as I thought this will be his response. It's not like this before /mentally sighed/. I decided to line up and order OUR food and went to the spot where he is sited.

After a while "What are you looking at?" I asked him because he kept on staring at me.

"Nothing, it's just because you're too beautiful" he answered while smiling but then I know that smile is fake, we've been together for more than a year so I already know this gesture of his. What can I do? I still have feelings for him.

When our order arrived we just silently ate our food. No sweet talks like before, and I am starting to get scared. I'm scared that I will lose him in an instant. I decided to ignore this feeling again.

After we finished eating. We decided to watch a horror movie. I love horror but I am easily to be scared but not to the point that I'll jump off my seat. We bought popcorn and drinks before we enter the cinema. But unlike before, I felt so different, the female scent mixed with his perfume worsen my mood. I can't enjoy the movie anymore.

I can't focus on the movie because of the voices in my head. I can't ignore it but I felt sad about it. Did I fall out of love? I want an answer but I can't answer myself if I do nothing. I looked at him and then hugged him even though there was this scent lingering around him.

He circled his arm around me and asked "are you okay?" I felt relieved when he asked that I can hear the worry in his voice "yes I'm okay" I replied still I can't stop imagining things. I'm slightly disappointed because the movie already ended but I did not enjoy it.

After the movie, we decided to go to the arcade-like we used to. I'm trying my best to act like we have no problem at all. Well, we have no problem at all. I am the one who has a problem I can't help myself but doubt him. At least in this part of our date, I enjoy it. I love playing arcades but when I'm here I love to play basketball. We used up all our tokens so we decided to leave and because we bring our own car we bid each other goodbye and went home.

After I arrived I directly went to my room to change my clothes and lay on my bed. I'm figuring out I can't ignore everything until the end. I decided to open my phone and decided to open my messenger. I am planning to chat with him but then an ad for an APP suddenly pops up on my screen.

"FoniTalk"