CHAPTER THIRTY NINE
Feifei did not know how he made his way back to the house nor how he got in his room.
He just stood still at the window.
His eyes blank.
His face expressionless.
But.
His tears were constantly flowing from his eyes.
His mind is in a limbo, floating, wandering. Indulged in reminiscence.
Kissing Yuan is like a secret.
Him touching Yuan, Yuan kissing him.
The provocative kisses.
Their mingled breaths.
The light erotic touches.
Feifei smiled achingly...
Its like an exhilarating illicit love affair.
But.
It turned out to be a false play love affair.
Everything turned out to be a sham.
A joke directed at him.
Feifei bit his lip hard until it bled.
He is numb. His whole body is numb.
Numb with overwhelming pain.
He desperately want to talk to someone. To vent out his grievances, his feelings of loss, his anguish.
He wants someone to understand this soul penetrating hurt and explain to him, tell him how to take this pain away.
Feifei gritted his teeth. Suppressing his sobs.
Why? Why?
He doesn't understand anything anymore.
He wants to roar. To shout.
Why did Yuan just suddenly stopped seeing him.
Without notice.
He just doesn't understand why he would just disappear like that.
He thought they had something special going on. And that he meant something to Yuan. The way Yuan meant something to him.
But he disappeared. Just like that.
If Yuan truly liked him, the way he feel he does, it shouldn't be like this.
Should it?
He really wanted someone to explain to him how things work. How to make it work.
Can someone please tell him what to do? To enlighten him and wake him up.
But.
Now he knows.
He knows. And understood.
He is just a joke.
Feifei clutched his heart as he wailed loudly in despair.
So unfair.
What did he do to deserve this?
He broke down and cry.
He just fell inlove.
He sobbed.
Until he slept on the floor.