Emerald's POV-
I had vivid dreams whenever I did sleep which wasn't for very long. I felt like an overly hormonal teenager because whenever I did wake up the only thing I wanted was August.
Thankfully though August didn't mark me anymore. I'm not sure what came over him to want to mark me not only a second time, but a third time as well. I've been too scared to look in the mirror to see what I look like now.
I also haven't looked because August has a vice grip on me and even if I try and turn over in bed he will growl in his sleep and hold me tighter. I was okay with it though because the smell of honey flowers was too comforting not to enjoy. The dreams weren't my dreams. I think they were August's dreams or maybe his memories because the things I was seeing were foreign to me.
I was a small child and a tall handsome man with dark hair and blue eyes was trying to get me to pay attention to something he was saying, but I missed it.
"Son, one day you're going to be leading this pack. These lessons are important and one day I won't be here to remind you of them, so pay attention."
"Sorry dad, I'll do better I promise."
The dream or memory made me want to hold August and smooth his hair back for him. Even from a young age he was drilled about being an Alpha and I wondered if there was ever a time when he got to just be a kid.
That was a gift that August gave me. He gave me back my youth and gave me a second chance to have a childhood. Despite the fact I was always a little too mature around other kids my age because I had some form of life experience that they didn't. I had experienced bad people and I had come across good ones.
It'll make you grow up fast when you encounter the real world all on your own with no-one there to guide you in the right direction. Even with feeling like I was different I still got to do the same things as all the other kids. I played sports and playground games, I had sleepovers and even made up birthday parties because I don't actually know when it is. Not all of my memories are tainted from Scout and that is all because of what August did for me.
He sent me to someone he loved and knew would love me. He called regularly to check on me for years and I know if I had ever talked to him and asked him of anything he would've made sure to take care of it. From the moment I met him he's done nothing, but want to take care of me. My memories of being in that field or at the Kyser's or running in the woods before anyone else is awake with August. Those are all of my favorite memories, the ones I hold on to the most and try to re play in my head.
It's small now, but a part of me still doesn't want to leave here. Even though she's gone I would feel like I was leaving Helen behind. This is our home, the one I grew up in. The place where she made all my favorite foods and would have me sit by her feet while she tried to do anything she could with this hair. This is the place where I had my first kiss, my first romance, my first job, my first everything is here. Jody is here and this is now the place where I lost my virginity.
Every other part of me though knows full well that when August tells me to jump I will reply with how high? If he tells me we are going back to his pack then I know that I will go with him because the thought of us not being together is physically painful.
I was more then conflicted.
I wanted to go back home with him and see everyone that I haven't in so long. I wanted to smell that field again and run in those big thick woods that I've been missing. I wanted to see Kacey again and I wanted to be wherever August was.
I guess he is right though. I'm hurting both of us by fighting against the bond. It hurts me when I fight against my instincts and force myself to not hang all over August like some love struck puppy. That's what he wants though, I can feel it and I hear his thoughts clearly when I hurt him by not showing my feelings back towards him.
I feel very strongly towards August and it's the scariest and the greatest feeling I've ever had.
August pulled me closer to him and I felt sparks run down my face when he pecked his soft lips to my cheek. I smiled and rolled over to face him. His ashy hair was messy and the dark scruff on his face was much thicker now.
"How are you feeling my Luna?"
I chuckled at his deep sleepy voice.
"Sore." I replied and August smiled sheepishly.
It wasn't a lie, I was sore. Even though August didn't mark me again that didn't mean he came up here and we went straight to bed either.
He leaned over and pecked a kiss to my forehead.
"Good." He said before pulling away.
"Can I ask you something?" I asked and he nodded his head before he started to play with my hair.
"What if a part of me isn't ready to leave yet?"
To my surprise August smiled big at me.
"Are you worried about being a Luna?"
His question stunned me because honestly I haven't had a single thought about the fact that when I go home with him his pack isn't going to be getting ready to meet me,they'll be getting ready to meet their Luna.
"What kind of responsibilities do Lunas have?" I asked while propping myself up on one elbow.
August hummed for a minute and started to lightly trace his fingers over the mark on my collar bone. It stung still, but it wasn't something that I couldn't handle.
"Well, Lunas have a lot of responsibilities. You help me keep the pack united by being as involved with the pack as you can be. A lot of the younger females will look to you as an example to follow and the older ones.. well they will try and test your authority just like the older males do with me."
I scrunched my face up at this and August laughed.
"They can't help it though so try not to take it personally. We have to be strong and show why we are over the pack and sometimes they just wanna push our buttons to make sure we aren't weakening the pack or to test our loyalty to one another."
I nodded my head, but I still didn't like the idea of dealing with hostile females. I wasn't sure what he meant by testing our loyalty though.
"And of course there are your responsibilities as my mate." He chimed sounding a bit too satisfied.
"Oh really now?" I asked shaking my head at him.
He smiled and leaned over and I met him halfway to peck his warm soft lips.
"Yes really." He said lowly to me.
"Like what? Fucking you whenever you want?" I asked him with raised eyebrows.
He laughed hard and it was impossible for me not to smile when hearing it.
"Yes actually that would be nice." He said and I slapped his chest hard.
"No, but staying on my side about things is a big deal. We cannot be divided on issues and if we do disagree about something you can never allow yourself to show that in front of other pack members. We can disagree in private all you want, but to the pack we stand together on every decision."
August had changed his tone to being more serious and I could already tell that this was important to him.
"That's too bad. I think disagreeing on things is what we do best." I said to him teasingly and even though he was trying to be serious he still cracked a smile.
"I know and trust me I know we will always disagree on things. What matters though is that we keep those disagreements between us."
I nodded my head to him and he smiled.
"So what about you?" I asked and he raised an eyebrow at me.
"What about me? I'm Alpha? I pretty much carry most of the responsibilities I think."
I rolled my eyes and shook my head.
"Towards the pack sure, but what about to me?" I asked and he sat up more and grabbed the bottom of my chin to make me look up at him.
"My responsibility to you is to make you the happiest Luna on the planet. I would do anything for you Emerald and I might be an Alpha to everyone else, but to you? To you I'm whatever you want me to be. My job is to always take care of you, protect you... and to have as many pups as I can with you."
When he said that last sentence his eyes darkened almost fully and the first thing I heard was Zeb's cold voice in my head.
'Just the thought of you carrying one of my pups makes me feel alive."
My eyes went wide and I slowly pulled back from August until he wrapped his arm around me and pulled me back to him.
"Don't do that." He commanded.
"August, you have gotten your way with everything so far. You've rushed this entire thing for me and I think I've been pretty forgiving and patient about it, but if you ever try and rush me into having kids with you then I will resent you for it."
His eyes darkened completely and I could feel the anger radiating off of him.
"Tell me." He said through gritted teeth and at this point I automatically knew what he meant.
I sighed and laid my head down on his chest.
"I'm yours." I whispered and he wrapped both heavy arms over me and held me down on top of him.
I could feel him smelling my hair and after a minute I could feel him relax a little more.
"I won't rush, but I haven't been using protection with you so I can't promise you anything Emerald."
I rolled my eyes and snorted.
"What?" He asked and I picked my head up to look at him.
"Trust me you don't want to know." I said to him, but that only made him demand things.
"Tell me." He said darkly and I sighed.
I slowly got off his chest and then crawled back off the bed. I was fully naked still, but at this point August seeing my body was nothing to me.
"Okay I'll tell you, but you gotta control that temper of yours." I said trying to bite my lip to hold back the smile.
I was slowly inching myself back towards the bathroom and August was watching me like a hawk and started to scoot down to the end of the bed.
"Okay.." he said and I could still feel his anger just simmering underneath the surface.
"I went through a boy crazy faze pretty young, so Helen thought it would be a good idea to get me on birth control, just incase. You can cum in me all you want, but I don't think it's going to get very far with this inside me." I said and placed my hand on my lower stomach.
It was an implant birth control and I had made sure they put me in a strong one because at the time I was convinced I was going to lose my virginity soon, but obviously that didn't happen.
Before August jumped up I had slammed the bathroom door shut and locked it. August was banging on the door and yelling loudly for me to open it. His thoughts and Zeb's were both demanding me in my head to unlock the door, but instead I cut the shower on.
'You are getting that removed today.' August said harshly into my mind.
I rolled my eyes to myself, but didn't respond.
'Why would she put you on birth control? What were you doing?' his thoughts zoomed in and out of my head.
'Again you don't want to know.' I linked back to him and this time I jumped when hearing the loud growl coming from the other side of the bathroom door.
I quickly got into the shower and tried to focus on bathing myself, but I could still hear August pacing in the other room. I could feel his heated rage and I could definitely hear his angry thoughts towards all of male- kind.
'I lost my virginity to you obviously, so it's not like I was doing anything that bad.' I linked back trying to comfort him.
'Then if it wasn't that bad, why did she think birth control was an answer?' He shot back at me.
'Alright fine. You wanna know so bad? Jody and I had a sleep over when we were like thirteen. We snuck out to go shift and run and I accidentally saw him naked. It was completely innocent and we have never spoken about it sense, but I became a bit overly friendly to boys after that and Helen was concerned.'
He didn't respond, but I finished my rant anyway.
' I was so innocent August that I didn't even know really what it was that I saw. I just knew I didn't dislike it. I was honest with Helen about it and so she did what she thought was best.'
This didn't seem to make things better though because his voice in my head was now mixing in with Zeb's.
'I was still calling regularly when you were that age, why didn't she tell me?' He asked and I laughed out loud so hard I was sure he could hear me.
'Gee I wonder why?' I linked back to him sarcastically.
I could feel the insecurity and the jealousy and the pure hurt he was feeling. He was thinking about me seeing another man and even though I was just a kid when it happened it wasn't like I jumped Jody's bones or anything. Jody has known he likes guys for as long as I can remember, so nothing has ever happened between us and nothing ever will.
'I'm yours August. Only yours. Even when I didn't know it at the time, I was still yours.'
I linked back to him, but I heard my bedroom door open and close and a sharp pain ripped through my chest.