The mind is like water. When it's turbulent, it isn't easy to see. When it's calm, everything becomes more apparent. (Prasad Mahes)
I sat there staring at my mother for a long time as I tried to piece together what to say. Talking to her about boys should have been easy in an ordinary world, but it wasn't. How could I explain the chaotic world that I was now enthralled in? Would she be able to understand the wreckage that was in my heart?
"Mom, I don't understand how to explain my dilemma. There are just some things that I do understand and some that I don't," I reasoned.
Hey, eyes narrowed slightly. "I may not be a supernatural being or have any idea what it means to have a mate, but I can tell you, sweetheart, that men are just men, no matter if they're supernatural. I have lived a life and know little about matters of the heart."
I laughed, "I suppose you are right about that. Well, you know about Elijah and that he is my mate, but I have another mate." Her eyes widened. "Yes, apparently, in my...other life, I did a spell with Rosa that showed me Elijah being my mate, but Rosa also saw another mate, and she kept that from me. I did meet him before, but he was....let's say he seemed dangerous, perhaps even evil. He showed me how to access this power inside me, but he wanted to use it for nefarious purposes. I recently met him again in this life, and he seems different...changed, and I'm attracted to him more than I care to admit right now." My shoulders slumped, and I admittedly felt drained all over again. "Then there is all this drama with Elijah, the secrets, and the inescapable feeling that he doesn't value us being mates as seriously as he should."
My mother let out a whistle. "Well, you certainly have it going on, Helena. The first thing you need to ask yourself is, 'who do you want to be with and why?' You know your heart; you're just scared and confused because you've never been in love, and now you have to choose between two guys you care deeply about, "she paused, "but don't rush to figure it out. Time and patience are the two things in life that are practically limited. So, give yourself that and try not to make rash decisions."
I knew that she wouldn't understand how serious this was. I can't wait to choose when my heart is not the only one in peril. Then there are all the supernatural creatures coming from me in all directions because of my lineage. My life was seriously becoming a giant cluster fuck.
"You make that sound so easy, and it's not. There are so many factors that I have to consider, and I am still trying to figure out who I am. Either decision I make, countless people can and will get hurt, including myself. Elijah has been with me from the beginning, but I can't help but think that if I knew about my other mate, I could have saved us from this doom destined to repeat itself. Not to mention he has had a whole life before me. He could have been happy with a she-wolf had I not stepped into this picture. And then there is Cal. A wolf who has decided to change his outlook on life and power to appease me. To win me. How can I just easily say no to him?"
I finished with a huff and wondered if my mother understood anything I had said. It was such a long-winded explanation, but I hit all the keynotes.
She tucked another loose strand of hair behind my ear. "I can't tell you what to do. I can only tell you that the hardest choice is always the right one. You are still young, and you don't have to make a choice now." I started to say something, but she cut me off. "No, listen to me. I don't want to hear about how you lived a life before or how the world is at stake. When you're this age," she gestured to me with moving hands, "Everything is always so dramatic. It's the end of the world, no matter what. Give yourself time to evaluate the situation and see what will make you happy."
As far as advice went, this was the best a mother could do. Could it help me? I wasn't so sure that it would or that I would listen to her. As much as my Mom wanted to understand what was happening, I don't think she did. There was a war brewing, and I was at the center of it.
"Mom, thank you." I wrapped my arms around her slim waist, "I appreciate the advice, and I am sorry that you're now in the middle of this as well."
"I'm your mother, and I will always be here." She kissed my temple.
A cough from the door made us both turn.
"That was so touching. I want a freaking hug too." Daisy said.
She ran and jumped on the bed, tackling me with her body.
"Oh my God, you're so damn heavy. What is with you? You would've broken my ribs." I squealed.
She rolled her eyes and started mock punching me, and for a moment, we just seemed like two typical teenage girls playing around. The tightness in my chest started to loosen just a bit, and I continued to smile.
"Oh, please. The almighty powerful descendant of the Goddess herself. My weight should be nothing to you. Aren't you able to suck my ass dry?" She laughed.
I slapped her shoulder, "Hey, watch your mouth; my mom is in here."
"It's quite alright. I've heard worse when you two think I'm not listening. I recall you telling Daisy she was a stupid fucking cunt' on the phone a few weeks ago."
We both stared at her. Then before I knew it, we were cuddling each other, laughing until I could feel tears pricking the corner of my eyes.
"Well, you know what they say about eavesdroppers." I continued laughing.
"They never hear anything nice." Daisy and I said in unison.
My mother scolded us as she got up to leave.
"You girls make my ass hurt sometimes." She pointed at both of us. "I'm going to enjoy the hot tub downstairs. If you don't mind? And I must say, Helena, your mate, boyfriend, or whatever the hell you want to call him, seems to be pretty rich." She shot me a glare.
"He isn't broke, that's for sure." I shrugged.
"Men with money often have serious power and ego issues."
I took a deep sigh, "You have no idea." I whispered.
She gave me a motherly look and then excused herself. How hard will this be for her? I wondered if she knew what kind of power issues he had. He was an Alpha, after all.
"I can see the tiny wheels in your head spinning, Helena." Her eyes turned soft, "I heard most of what you told your mom. So, you have two mates?" She asked with a curious expression.
I blew out hot air. "Yes, I do. And let me tell you; it's a bitch. But what I didn't tell my mother was the extent of how far I went with Cal."
"What do you mean?" Her expression turned disgusting.
"Don't look at me like that. I'm not saying I had sex with the guy, but we did get pretty hot-heavy. And to tell you the truth, I'm not sure I regretted it. Which pretty much makes this situation more complicated."
"Helena? You and Elijah are true mates. How could you?" The anger in her eyes was more palpable.
I immediately got angry at her. "Why are you judging me? Did you act this way when Elijah was out fucking and getting betrothed to bitches when he knew about me?" I could feel the rage starting to bubble within me.
She paused for a moment. "With Elijah, it is a little different."
I recoiled in shock. "What the fuck do you mean?" My anger caused me to cuss a little more than necessary.
"He is my Alpha, Helena. It is tough for me to voice my opinion without being insubordinate." She said in a shameful voice.
Suddenly, I wasn't as mad anymore. I understand now how those bonds with the pack worked. Plus, I felt Elijah's Herculean Aura, which was intense. And it wasn't like she was saying she agreed; she couldn't voice her opinion to him.
"It's alright. I understand what you are saying, and I can respect that. This is a complicated situation, but I need you to be a friend and not a foot soldier for mates and the pack. Can you do that for me? I can use a friend?" My voice cracked.
Her long arms wrapped around me, pulling me close. "Of course. You need only ask." She pulled backward, "But before we sing our kumbaya, I want you to know something."
An evil smirk downed her face, and I was immediately apprehensive about what she was going to say, but as I looked at her playful smile and the devious glint in her eyes, I knew whatever she said would only make me laugh and love her more. My mother was right. All I needed was time. Time to be an ordinary girl with an everyday life. No matter what, these problems would still be here, and I needed the patience to sift through the drama.
I wrinkled my nose and eyed her through slits.
"You are a dirty little slut." She stated in a pragmatic tone.