"I'm starving and I can't even stand up!" Cried Theon.
The man was lying on the ground with his one arm supporting and raising his head, served as a pillow, he was facing outside the cave waiting patiently for Ambroz who left him with nothing but rocks and pebbles.
"Where has he been? If only he could help me set a foot straight then I would not be lagging around and set free from slumping myself here." He complained.
While he was loitering, he heaved a sigh. Remember how he pleads for Ambroz's huge thing inside him. Embarrassed, he covered his face and rolled around.
He groaned and said, "The vulgarity is killing me! How could I ever say that? Land! Just please swallow me right at this very moment!"
He closed his eyes and bit his exaggerated lips. He hissed at the sting he felt vibrating through its skin. His chest throbbing, still. And the marks on his neck down all over are creating an odd pain. It was rather making him arch in raw pleasure. More importantly, his bottom entrance was swollen. What has his body become?
He tried to think through if he will feel the same with other men, but all there is to them was making him twitch. To burst the bubble, he is not even interested in such a thing. He can not help and think if Zynthia was just watching him from above and saying words about him liking someone of an equal kind. A man.
Therefore, "Ambroz is the only man who I would be willing to do these things, and he's a man! For Pete's sake!"
He got embarrassed at himself for what he concluded. His heart was beating rapidly as it was true. Only Ambroz can make him feel such things inside his heart and stomach.
"This feeling, like Paradise surfacing with waterfalls streaming and how the cerulean of the sky blisters. What a way to describe it, but it's the only words I could express with what I'm feeling." He said as he sighs. "And Ambroz might just not feel the same way. With someone as handsome as he, be he alive and out of this forest so he could fulfil one of his desiring wishes. A family."
Silence be held his surroundings. He's not even sure as to why he thought that way of Ambroz. But he, too, dreams of a proper family.
"A family? What is a proper family? A father, a mother, sons, and daughters? Is that it?" He questions himself. "But, mother Zynthia, Father Ganord, are not even my true kin, Eliaz, and Mikka, the people too. But they are family to me..."
He then realized that there's no still definition to a family. Whatever fills your heart with content and gives you eternal happiness is what makes it a family. He has come to his senses and retreats his thoughts about Ambroz.
"I shouldn't be the one to declare his fate. All I can do is to save his fate."
Unintentionally, he stood up making him fall right back.
"Ah! That's right, my body is still unwell." He said. "I say such things but where in the world is Ambroz?"
He started to rub the pain in his back and slowly stood up, guiding and supporting himself while holding the cave's walls to prevent himself from falling again. As soon as he arrived outside, he used his palm to cover the sun rays that lay beside his eyes. His face crinkled a bit.
He thanked the structure of his body for being quite stabilized or else he won't even move a single meter if he wants to.
"Where is he? I'm hungry already!" He cried out with his furrowed brows.
Looking around there was no sign of him.
He wandered around his eyes and all he sees were trees and a few birds. He searched someplace to sit and rest his thumping body.
He sighed when he finally was able to rest himself. But as he settled his bottom down, it quivered from his lower back to his nape. He gritted his teeth and hardly blink his eyes close.
"O-ouch! Ah, that hurts. I can't even sit still—"
He immediately glanced towards the direction where he heard footsteps, the dried leaves making it a bare sound. He almost had a heart attack, turns out it was just Ambroz, looking at him in shock as he carried fruits in his arms.
What a man! He did not even hear him talk resulting in this feeling of instant anxiousness and animosity.
"At least, give me a hint that you're approaching me. I absolutely thought that was someone else!" He exhaled and held his chest, a way of calming himself down.
Ambroz was as shocked as ever. Although, he does not know to why he is the one who acts like that.
"Why did you stand up? Your thighs and your bottom, don't they hurt?" Ambroz worriedly yelled at him and rapidly took steps towards him.
'I see, so that's why he was shocked. But these fruits... Too many...'
"You should have waited for me," Ambroz settled down the fruits. "Why are you so persistent?"
Theon was silent for a moment. 'He cares for me? But why? I don't understand.'
He pressed his lips staring at Ambroz arranging the fruits while relentlessly scolding him for taking even a step out. Indeed, it might be heard as scolding to someone, but he finds it quite fluttering, it might be only his presumptuous self being swayed by the feels but hearing these words from Ambroz. He might have just cared about him and how he feels.
"fast..."
"Hm? Did you say something?" Theon asked. He could not hear Ambroz clearly. Too occupied with his reveries.
Ambroz indicated a palm on his face. As if he was already too done.
"Why are you just staring at me for? I was asking you why you had to head out and stood up that fast?" Ambroz asked.
"Well, I was looking for you. Sitting there was making me hungry. I never knew you were picking fruits for me." Theon reasoned out.
Ambroz looked at him and blink a few times. "F-for you? N-no, I mean, I picked this not entirely because of you. I got hungry t-too. Don't flatter yourself, huh, I was just as hungry as you. Enough with this talk, how are you still standing? Lie down." Ambroz questioned looking in another direction.
Theon was pressed his gaze on Ambroz's face that has somehow turned pretty red. He doesn't know what to say. He just witnessed a man who was cold and distant flustered in front of him.
"If you say so, Ambroz," Theon said. But as soon as he tried to lie down, the crumbs and throbbing came back like electricity in his system.
"Ah!" He shouted.
"Hey, slow down," Ambroz immediately went to help him out. "Come here." He held his back and the back of his knees. Without a cue, he carried Theon in bridal style.
Theon widened his eyes and even attempted to escape Ambroz's arms.
"W-what do you think you're doing?" He stuttered.
"Carrying you? Should I have left you to suffer?" Ambroz raised a question with a bit of pitch in his tone.
"N-no, but you can carry me in another way. This," he gulped. "This is how you carry a woman!"
Ambroz was truly confused about what was wrong with it. Did the generation pass traditions over time?
"What now? There's a specific way to carry each and the otherkin? What madness. If I would have carried you on my back and split your legs open then your swollen hole would have hurt even more as I mmm—"
Theon covered Ambroz's mouth with his hands. "Alright! Alright! I get it, you don't have to tell me those details!" He yelled.
He got so flustered. And it worsen when they were staring hard at each other. A few seconds of their hard stare and Theon realized how his hands were still covering Ambroz's face. He immediately retrieved his hands. And made a look; awkward smile and narrowed eyes.
"S-so sorry!"
While he looked at someplace, Ambroz sighed and continued walking inside the cave, not too deep inside just enough to be able to see outside.
He laid Theon down on the fabric of his other cloth, with full of care and consideration. Not a single pain stung on his back and to his nape. But only Ambroz's thick, vein, and strong arms caressed his back and feet softly. He was being treated just like a woman, but he refuses to believe that he was treated so.
"I'm not treating you like a woman," Ambroz said after noticing Theon's looks.
"I-i was not thinking about that at all!" Theon responded.
'How did he know about that? For the nth time, is he some sort of mind reader and sought through an evil sorcery forging himself to seek through someone's head. Seriously, what is it with this man?' he panicked inside his subconscious.
"And no, I am not an evil fellow."
"A-and I am also not thinking about that!" Theon responded again.
Ambroz looked at him. "You're face is too conspicuous to read." And then it stood up and went outside.
Theon waited until it came inside carrying the fruits he had prepared and opened it himself. He went down on his knees and reach it for Theon.
"Thank you," he uttered while still in a very awkward state.
They ate and ate until he witnessed Ambroz leaning his back on the walls of the cave and massaging his head. The man looked like he was going through something aggravating and a troublesome event.
'I knew it. He's disgusted, after all, he really does regret doing those things with me when he asked me to leave out of it in the first place.' he thought and looked very anguished by it. 'How could I have done that?'
Little did he know that Ambroz was also still observing him. As Theon placed the epicarp(skin) away of the fruits he ate, with such a downcasted mood.
Ambroz looked at him. "What are you thinking, now?"
Theon froze. He knew that Ambroz might have just noticed his behaviour, again.
"N... Nothing to worry about." He faked a smile.
"Really?" Ambroz asked as he moved closer to Theon.
Theon tried his best to avoid the man's stares as he wanted to hide his feelings and thoughts. He is scared to reveal it as it may have been seen that he has taken a liking to this man. A man that's making him ask questions about himself.
"Tell me, what are you thinking?"
But of course, he could not win with Ambroz persistence.
Ambroz held his chin and made him face his face. Now he was again struck by its furious eyes. As his breath was touching the bottom part of his lips. He pressed it and tried swaying his gaze away. But he just could not do it.
"Theon, tell me.."
"Alright! Just please let my chin go." He pleaded.
Ambroz wasn't the type to act instantly and stared at him. "Would you tell me?"
He groaned. "Yes, I will. So let me go!"
In the end, Ambroz followed what he said and moved inches away from him to give the solace to speak firmly and true. As well as honest.
"I was thinking if you were thinking about the things we did which were regretful. And it... It made me quite... disheartened." He whispered.
Ambroz spread silence in his system but decided to talk. "Ah," he groaned and scratched his nape. "I'm the one who is at fault here. Being in that state like a hungry animal, you were treated just like prey. And even made you do things only for my sake. Now, your body is aching, throbbing, and even a sensitive part is swollen. Looking at your body, I have made such a sinful mess." Ambroz closed his eyes harshly and placed his fist on his forehead.
Theon crawled over him and removed the fist on his forehead. "But it really isn't the case, Ambroz. You see..."
Ambroz opened his eyes and looked at Theon in despair. Theon was gripping his hand.
"You see... Uh... I didn't regret it." Theon whispered.
Ambroz couldn't believe what he heard. "You didn't regret, what?" But he asked to assure that it was not just the bugs buzzing in his ears.
"What we did," Theon faced him. "I never regretted it. I meant for myself to be prey. It was never you, it was me." His eyes were tearing up as he said those words.
He tried to stop his tears for a moment.
"You," Ambroz uttered as his face turned bitter. "What are you even saying?" He stood up and slap Theon's hand away.
Theon was shocked by it. He gasp lightly but then decided to speak up. "I'm saying that truth! I think I like you, Ambroz. And this is not even a mistake, I—"
"No!" Ambroz uttered firmly.
"Why? What do you mean no?" Theon asked almost verge in tears.
"Huh," He scoffed. "No. This is a mistake. You should regret this! You should hate and be frightened. You were supposed to run away and escape from my grasp as soon as you saw me in that state! You should have instead acted like you were afraid. Like the others!" He unconsciously said.
"T-the others? Someone saw you in that state before me?" Theon surprisingly asked with pungent eyes.
Ambroz was also shocked by what he said. He didn't know that he would have utter such words.
As for Theon, his heart felt like it was struck by a sharp arrow. Breathing was arduous at this point. It was hurting him. Ambroz was hurting him. But what can he do? Nothing.
"I don't see any purpose for me to tell you that, you don't need to know," Ambroz said before harshly leaving Theon with no words to say. Speechless.
Theon watched Ambroz's back, rapidly escaping from his sight, there, the tears that he was trying to suppress went racing to his chin. Theon's eyes became a blur and he cried in silence. Gripping his chest as there was an excruciating pain coming from it. His body was aching all over but he didn't mind it. The pain created in his subconscious was even more agonizing. He couldn't breathe.
Theon was trying to grasp why he is feeling this pain inside him. What was the reason? Crying over someone, whining, and finding it hard to catch air. Why is he feeling like this? The same feeling of when he lost his cousin Eliaz and his mother Zynthia, as well as the chief Ganord.
He started calming himself down when he thought that what Ambroz said was true. There was no purpose in telling him his past or what others may have seen from him. They are not even related to each other. What they did was barely something physical. Nothing was taken from each other. His feeling was the only thing created after that. Maybe he didn't regret it but Ambroz probably did.
"He looked so mad at me..." He whispered to himself. "As if I had done something so wrong. Shi-"
He almost cursed when he felt a throb from his back again when he tried to sit still. Then he decided to lie himself down and settle his body until he can finally stand up.
"I said it. I completely said it. What was I thinking serving my feelings for him that fast? Was it because of the bare moment that made me say it? Agh! I don't know anymore." He groaned and sniffed.
After overthinking, he dozed off with tears flowing from his eyes.
It was not even that long when he heard a low growling noise from afar, it echoed to his senses and he woke up pretty quickly because of that.
"Ah! What was that?" He got up and did not even feel the throb in his back.
The noise was even more raring to mind. After a growl, he heard someone yell in pain with a thick voice. A man. Sounds as if...
"Ambroz? It cannot be. Where could he be again." He tried standing up and he successfully did that.
He went outside and silence himself. But then again, he heard it once more.
"GRAH!" A loud beast-like voice with a hint of violence.
He hurried outside as he kept on thinking that what if Ambroz was already caught by the conquerors? What if he was already killed? What if he was also slaughtered like how Eliaz was and his troops?
He was overthinking again. He could not help but think this way, it really sounded like Ambroz. He was paranoid about it.
"Please, just please if there really is a God above there. Please keep Ambroz safe." He wished underneath his whispers.
He was outside when he halted. Trying to listen to where it came from.
"AGH—" There it is again, it seems to distance away each second.
"There!" He yelled and run as fast as he can to follow that voice.
"Agh... Ngh..."
"Where is he?" He started panicking as the grunts were all over the direction.
But he followed his instincts. He runs and runs as fast as he can. Trees after trees, leaves getting stepped and crunched, and the birds looking at him as he rushed to a direction of nowhere.
His heart was palpitating. Theon was worried and felt fearful. He does not want to think of it negatively but what he can he possibly do with his head already filled with the conquerors' evil doings.
After running, he found himself at the location where he followed Ambroz that one time. Where he bruised himself. After halting, there he felt all the throb in his body parts, his stomach began to feel a sting inside, and he was running out of air. But he managed it, although he almost fell.
"Why am I here? I followed his voice and it led me here..."
He roamed his eyes around and saw a familiar tree. The huge trunk tree is filled with vines.
"That's the tree Ambroz was talking to! And uttered a name? Was it Araya? Arala? Ugh, I don't know!" He groaned as he walked closer to it.
He looked at the bulky roots connecting it to the ground. And somehow, there seems to be a hole. He lean to it and held on to his knees for support. But just as he realized there was a hole, he felt someone pull him in and brought him down.
"Woah—"
The land swallowed him and he fainted after being pulled deep down. His body was hit by small roots and yet he was numb to it.
He arrived down and still was in deep slumber. Theon has brought upon himself the truth of everything he sees.
———————
ABYSSCESS