" It's hard to explain. I mean, I'm not entirely sure if I know myself. Sorry I don't have all the answers. But none of that matters, Okay? I'm here now. And you and me are connected again. You don't know how much I missed you... "
I missed you too. I missed you so much, Sam. But the words won't come out. A part of me still thinks I'm dreaming. Maybe I've fallen through some rabbit hole and entered an alternate reality. Or maybe I hit my head harder than I thought. Whatever it is, I'm afraid that if our conversation ends, I will lose him again and never get my answer.
The rain continues. But the sky has reduced it to a soft drizzle.
" What's that sound?" Sam asks, listening. " Is that rain? Julie, where are you?"
I glance around. For a moment, I forgot how I ended up here.
" Somewhere outside."
" What are you doing out there?"
" I don't remember..."
" Are you near your home?"
" No ... I —I'm not sure where I am."
" I'm not really sure of anything at the moment.
" Are you lost?"
I think about this question. There are so many ways I could answer it. Instead, I close my eyes to shut out the rest of the world, focusing on Sam's voice, trying to hold on to it for as long as I can.
" You should get out of the rain, Julie ... Find someplace safe and dry, okay?" Sam says. " And as soon as you do, give me a call back."
My heart jolts and I open my eyes.
" Wait!" My voice cracks. " Please dont hang up!"
I'm not ready to lose him again.
" Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere," he says. " Get somewhere safe and call me back. As soon as you do, I'll pick up. I promise."
He's made promises before that he didn't keep. I want to refuse but I can't seem to speak. I wish I could keep him on the line forever. But Sam repeats this words over and over until I start to believe them.
" As soon as you call me back ... I'll pick up."
I can't stay out here forever. ok m drenched and am beginning to lose the feeling in my hands. I need to get out of these woods, and out of the cold, before the sun goes down and I can't find my way back.
I don't remember how the call ended or what happened after. That part remains a blur in my mind like a missing page from a book. All I know is that I kept walking until I made it out of the woods and found the main road again.
* * *
It's late evening by the time I reach town. I hurry along wet sidewalks, passing beneath store canopies to avoid the rain. The lights from the diner where I met Mika this morning are off, but the cafe down the street is still lit up. It is the only light on for blocks. I cross the street and make my way inside. Even at this hour, the place is half filled with students from the University, coupled together beneath Moroccan lamps. Raincoats hang over the backs of bar stools. Laptop screens illuminate blank faces. I make my way toward a table in the back without ordering anything. Once I settle down, I turn my chair away from the others and face the window. There are no mirrors in this cafe, so my pale reflection in the glass catches me by surprise.
I blow out the tea candle and the image of me vanishes. I run a hand through my wet hair. My clothes are dripping into the hardwood floor. Maybe I should have wrung them out a little before I came in. Thankfully this corner of the cafe is dark enough to keep me unnoticed.
I take a few deep breaths to calm myself, and glance around the room. The woman at the table near me is reading a book. I don't want her to overhear the phone call, so I wait a little. She is sitting alone, dressed all in black, and I wonder if she works here. Maybe she's reading on her break. She sips her tea slowly, making me anxious. It isn't until she gets up to leave that I breathe easier. I pull outy phone. Its almost nine. How did it get this late? This is the first I've been aware of the time since I left the house. There are no new message or missed calls. I guess no one noticed I was gone.
I set my phone down on the table and pick it up again. I do this several more times until I lose count. The smell of caffeine and chai singes my nose. Now that I've made it out of the woods, and am thinking more clearly, the thought of calling Sam again seems ridiculous. whatever happened out there was probably all in my head. At least, I think so. Have I completely lose it?
I must have, because I pick up the phone again and dial his number. The call goes through. I hear the first ring and hold my breath.
TO BE CONTINUE .....
Author: DUSTIN THAO