"Son? Why are you here? Aunt Trixie asked when she saw me.
Trixie Sebastian, the twin sister of my real mother since I was made thru surrogacy she carry me for her twin sister's request because her body is weak due to severe heart disease. (Please refer to book 1 title: Pregnancy of the virgin)
Aunt Trixie said softly as if she was talking to a little boy. She's very pretty at her age most of the people mistakenly asked me if was my sister.
"Mom? that was the first word that came out of my mouth because of this heavy feeling but she seems to be able to notice what's wrong with me right now.
"It's okay son, I know you have a lot of burdens especially right now and I am willing to listen. Riddle look I'm not your real mom but I carry you for almost 9 months, so I know and I will always notice if you have a problem or something. (The reason why Trixie carried Riddle for 9 months can be found in book 1 "THE PREGNANCY OF THE VIRGIN".)
"Mom, I failed to be a good person like you always wanted. I failed. Mommy Trisha is probably mad at me because right now if she's alive. I'm so bad, I failed, I failed. I don't deserve your love."
"Ride what are you saying? You're not bad I know because we raised you. You always choose what's the best for others. You always forget about yourself just to protect and help someone.
"You don't understand mom." I answered. She give me a warm hug without any question and it comforts me a lot.
"I'm here to listen, do you want me to call daddy Dim?" she asked.
I shook my head because I'm not ready to confess. I'm not ready to say everything, I'm still scared and at the same time hated myself after destroying my victim's life and my own life just to save lea.
"Mom, do you feel jealous about mommy Trisha since she was the first love of daddy Dim?" I asked.
She give me a sweet smile. A very similar smile with my mommy Trisha that I always see in my old photobook. They are both beautiful and selfless.
"Never. Did you know why? because your mom is understanding and good person, However the world is unfair because Trisha's life is shorter than us, but if I'm given a chance? I still want to be with her. She's everything I have before you came and we don't need competition especially in someone's heart, In your daddy's heart and in your heart though maybe dim and me will have different path if she live up to now." He answered with a smile.
"Really? Even once? "
"Yeah, after the death of my late husband Clarence we never expect that we will love each other. There are lots of heartbreaks before we finally love and consider this marriage son, but now I can say that every tears are worth it."
All of her words are really comforting. I don't know but it seems like her life with Daddy dim is very perfect even though she had a lot of heartbreaks and pain before but still, she's standing with a big smile and great strength each day.
Aunt Trixie or mama Trixie is a very important person in my life I owe her everything that I have, I always wanted to thank this lady for nurturing me, for fighting, and giving life for me. I wouldn't be here if it weren't for mom. Imagine giving and spending more than a year just to give life for your twins sister's son? she showed me unconditional life
"Aren't you sorry? Because you married Daddy Dim? he is your twins' lover."
"No son child and I will never regret it, I already forgot the feeling of being broken when I marry your father." She answered with a smile.
"But you really love Tito Clarence, right?" Tito was his boyfriend before he married daddy dim and before my mommy, Trisha died.
"Of course Riddle, no words can describe how much I loved him, and to be honest when I was with him I see future with him."
"What about dad?"
"I really love him too, son."
"Really? Is that okay? I mean you both love them until now?"
She smiled and then nodded, I know that Aunt Trixie loves Uncle Clarence whom she first married because she thought they would be together for life. But destiny is truly playable, and the world is hard to resist. He died after they got married. This was the twist and saddest part of her life.
Imagine being widowed months after the wedding? this is painful unpredictable and hard.
After their wedding, Uncle Clarence's severe headache became so frequent that he almost writhed in pain. She became worried about it because there are times that he become violent due to a severe headache he was depressed and very ill at that time. That headache is because of the accident before the wedding (Story can be found in book 1 title pregnancy of the virgin).
He was taken to the hospital and there it was found out that his skull was damaged, which he got by accident with aunt Trixie.
Aunt Trixie was scared because of Tito Clarence's worsening condition most of the time tito Clarence cannot recognize his wife, his condition is rare. But now I'm only sure of one thing. Daddy dim owns Aunt Trixie's heart after all.
"You know son, there are 3 kinds of love. The first love, second and third love. First love was the kind of love that will make you blush and flatter the romantic excitement is really there it usually happens at a very young age and that love always did the dumbest, weirdest things for life, after a year or when you get older you will realize that it wasn't really love but don't regret about it because that feeling will shape you into a man or lady that knows how to sacrifice, to give and to let go. And I know it was my Clarence he is my first love. We did a lot of things together that shape us into mature and older ones.
"You is your second love?"
"Second love? hmmm. My second love. It was the love that will hurt you the most. It will make you cry it will break you into pieces. You will fall in love with this person and you will picture out your future with him, love that teaches us lessons love that will make us stronger and ready to face the reality of life. But second love is the one that will hurt us the most because this love includes a lot of pain, struggle, lies, and emotional damage. But believe me, it was part of life so don't give up when they hurt you, when they break you, Second love is the one where we grow the most.
"And who is your second love?"
"It was Clarence, he is my first and second love. After the accident, he forgot about me, but later on, her heart was able to recognize me and we continue our love, But it cause a lot of pain because I lost him. I lost him for the 2nd time around. And no word can describe how much it hurts.
"The third love?"
"The third love, it was your dad. third love comes blindly, with no warning and it comes silently, I'm not looking for love anymore after my husband died but it comes to me like air. I put up all my walls to protect myself little did I know that he is my safe place, one day I find myself looking for him, missing him and caring about him he is not my ideal man but I get lost in his eyes when he look at me but we see beauty in our imperfections our heartbreaks and heartache lead us to each others arms. We are sure that we love and we are ready to settle.
I was looking straight into her eyes, and I can see the happiness in her eyes while telling me her pain before they got married.
I know their love is precious and they thank the universe for letting them be each other's end game. I know for sure, what I did three months ago will be a big heartbreak for both of them. I have no chance to tell them what I did.
"What about dad? How much does he love you?
"I really love your mama Trixie son. Daddy replied who had been in the back listening.
"Won't you even include me in your heart-to-heart conversation huh? You should include me here guys." He added.
He walks toward us "Looks like the conversation is serious huh? May I join please?"
"I thought you are at work?" Mama Trixie asked.
"I have my connection remember? Marc told me that you were here so went home to see you and to check you." He answered while smiling.
This man keeps on reminding me how much he loves me, being a surrogate baby is never easy but I can say that he gave me the best childhood, he always spend time with me and he is a stage father. He guided me so well I honestly admire his sacrifices and hustles just to comfort me and give me the best life.
Marc is a good reporter to my dad. His timing is really good.
"So going back to the topic why did you ask about my love for your mommy Trixie, have you ever doubted my feelings about your mom?"
I just shook my head, Then smiled. Having a complete family Makes my life complete.
"Dad? Thank you for being the best father, I just love listening to the story before you married each other."
"No Riddle, thank you for being the best son." He answered quickly, then I feel the sadness and disappointment in myself. They have no idea of what I did because of love. They gave me everything but I have committed a sin they can't imagine, I've been fooled because of love, Now I regret why I forced myself to Lea even I know from the start that a guy like me cannot make her stay.
How?
How?
How can I say that I raped? How can I say I have ruined my life? How?
There are lots of questions in my head because of what I did, dad is kind but he won't tolerate what I've done.
Kringggg ... kringgggg ... kringgggg ... kringgggg ... kringgggg ... My phone rang and I immediately looked at who was calling and it was Lea. I immediately turned off my phone to avoid her, I need more time and space.
"Is it a girl? Dad asked then he sat down next to aunt Trixie and took her on his shoulders.
"Yeah, it's a girl." I'll answer plainly with a sad voice. There is no sense if I hide my sadness in front of my parents they know me well.
"I also went through that Ride! Are you having trouble handling her mood? Or is there a Love quarrel? Just tell me maybe I can help you son."
I shook my head and laughed. Dad was a bit arrogant as he had never experienced being rejected by a girl except for Aunt Trixie's rejection when uncle Clarence died.
"Do you want advice?" He asked with a smile.
He had no idea of what problem I'm dealing with.
"Not this time dad, maybe I will share you this next time, for now, I don't want to fight against destiny, I wanted to go with the flow dad," I answered.
"If that's what you want then I will respect you son, but don't forget that we are willing to listen okay, we always have time for you okay?" He answered while tapping my shoulder.